Teacher's Pet Page #6

Well, I...|Just catching up on a little reading.

"The Mind in a Primitive Environment. "

"Symptoms and Syndromes"?

Yeah, like Burns and Allen.

"The Effects of Frustration|on the American Woman. "

That is the story of my life.|That I gotta read.

"Formulation and"... What does|this guy do, write in double talk?

Must haVe taken him a good 60 years|to write all this stuff.

Yeah!

With no time off|for bad behaViour.

The old boy must be about ready|to retire on his pension.

Hey, wait a minute.|Here's a picture of the guy.

Brother!

What is this?

Doesn't anyone do any work|around this joint any more?

- I'll read it during lunch.|- Mr. Gannon?

- Yeah?|- I was wondering if...

Roy said it was all right with him|if it was all right with you...

that I could try writing a few obituaries.

Yeah, I think that's a good idea.

And here's a great one to start on:|Dr. Hugo Pine.

How did he die?

I haVen't decided yet.

What's a fiVe-letter word|for New Zealand parrot?

I know I don't haVe|an appointment with her...

but I just want to see her|for a few minutes.

She's reading the rest of your story.|She'll see you when she's done.

I want to see her about something|else. It won't take more than-

- Sorry.|- Come in.

Mr. Gallagher, I'm so excited|about this piece.

- Thanks.|- It's a brilliant job.

I'Ve just been comparing it|with these other stories and...

Well, you don't know what it means|for a teacher to find someone like you.

It wasn't so good.|Awfully long, I thought.

It could stand a little work.

And I'd loVe to sit here with you|and work on-

Okay, let's.|Do you mind if I take my coat-

No, I'm sorry I haVe a dinner|appointment. It's a friend's birthday.

As a matter of fact, I'm late already.|But before you go...

- I want you to make me a promise.|- What's that?

That you'll giVe up|the wallpaper business...

and really make a stab at reporting.

- No, I don't think-|- I'll help you in eVery way that I can.

Mr. Gallagher, I'Ve neVer before asked|a night class student to do this.

I'm so sure about you.

These pieces you wrote|are good enough to be printed...

- in any paper in this town.|- Before I take a step like that...

shouldn't I should prepare myself|a little more?

I didn't mean tomorrow.

- Take some other subjects?|- Of course.

- English. History is Valuable.|- What about Psychology?

Excellent.

Any particular class or teacher?

It's a little late for this semester,|but Dr. Pine is here at the UniVersity.

He's one of the most eminent men|in the country.

No, I don't get along with|eggheads like that.

Not Hugo.|Hugo?

Dr. Pine.

He's a delightful, unassuming,|wonderful person.

Yeah.

As a matter of fact,|he's the one I'm haVing dinner with.

I'll mention it to him.

I'm sure there's something|that he could suggest.

No doubt.|But you do think that...

someday you really might consider|giVing up what you'Ve been doing?

Someday? I'm giVing it up right now.

I can see I'Ve been wasting my time.

Mr. Gallagher, I'm delighted.

Let's shake on it.

Mr. Gallagher!

So long, Professor.

Cigars? Cigarettes?

What kind would you like, sir?

These days a girl's gotta know|all about deductibles, capital gainses...

things like that, or she can wind up|working for the goVernment.

What do you think?

- What?|- NeVer mind.

You'Ve been thinking enough today.

Someone you know?

Slightly.

Who's the character with her?

He's dreamy. Must be from Hollywood.

He's a psychologist.

No kidding!

Well, what do you know?

It just shows you, you can't tell by looks.

Jim-zee, what's a psychologist?

A guy who giVes all kinds of adVice|about things he knows nothing about.

So he's got more degrees|than a thermometer.

So he speaks seVen languages.|So he's read eVery book.

So what?

The important thing is|he's had no experience.

He didn't start at the bottom|and work up.

That's the only way you can learn.

You're so right, Jim-zee. Take me.

Where would I be if I just read books?

I gotta go get undressed.

Coming oVer after?

Talk to him about|anything but psychology...

and I bet you he's a dead pigeon.

Don't get mad at me.

I'Ve got plenty of experience.

That's what I like about you.

Coming oVer after?

You got a date.

Just thought I'd drop by and say,|"Happy Birthday".

Mr. Gallagher, how thoughtful of you.|This is Dr. Pine.

- How do you do?|- How do you do?

He's the star pupil|I was telling you about.

- Yes.|- He's Very adVanced.

Won't you join us for a drink?

Don't mind if I do. Scotch.

- Erica?|- Nothing, thanks. I'm doing just fine.

- Waiter.|- Yes, sir?

Two scotches.

- Where's your friend?|- Who?

You mean Miss DeFore? She had to|go backstage. She sings here.

She's Very pretty.

- Very talented, too.|- I'm sure.

Really a delightful, unassuming,|wonderful person.

Congratulations on|Symptoms and Syndromes.

- That ought to sweep the country.|- HaVe you read it?

Hasn't eVeryone?|I doubt it.

I haVen't been able to|get through it myself.

Miss Stone mentioned that you|might be interested...

in taking|an elementary psychology course.

No, I changed my mind.|Just a waste of time.

I agree with you.|Those lectures can be mighty dull.

I know. I giVe them.

I could suggest|a course of reading for you.

GiVe you twice as much in half the time.|And it'd be a pleasure for you.

There wouldn't be a single book|written by me.

Cigars? Cigarettes?

- Cheers!|- Cheers.

Cheers.

Cigars?

Then he spears this hot line driVe,|runs oVer and touches second...

then diVes oVer|and tags the runner sliding in.

It was in 1921.

The only unassisted triple play|in World Series history.

- His name was Bill...|- Wambsganss.

Yeah.

Wasn't that the 1920 Series?

'21.

No, it was the '20 Series,|now that I think of it.

I remember reading about it.|CleVeland against the Dodgers.

The Indians took fiVe games.

That year they first played|a fiVe out of nine game series.

They did it again in '21,|but the following year they went back...

to best four out of seVen.|Waiter! Round.

We were on the bridge.|The Admiral and I looked off...

and there was a kamikaze|headed straight for the Enterprise...

coming in low-|Isn't that a coincidence!

I was on the Enterprise at the time.

What a day. What a day that was.

I remember I was topside|at that particular moment.

- I was on duty at the time-|- Would you like to dance?

Of course. Just go right ahead.

It's the Mambo.

What's the matter?|It's a bit crowded.

It doesn't look too dangerous.|Where's your sense of adVenture?

If you'll excuse us.

Looks like they're getting ready|to start the floor show.

- Yeah, good.|- Cheers.

- Same table?|- Triples yet.

- Where's he putting them?|- Where are we going to put him?

Try it. It's Very simple.

How about you, sir?

Well, I'll try.

That was a Watutsi tribal rhythm.|It's played at Victory celebrations.

To the Watutsis.

Now a little change|from the Afro-Cuban rhythm.

Ladies and gentlemen,|the gal who inVented rock 'n' roll...

Miss Peggy DeFore!

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