The Cat's Meow Page #4

Synopsis: In November of 1924, a mysterious Hollywood death occurred aboard media mogul William Randolph Hearst's yacht. Among the famous guests that weekend were: film star Charlie Chaplin; starlet Marion Davies (who was also Hearst's mistress at the time); silent-film producer Thomas H. Ince (known for creating the first Hollywood-studio facility and for creating an "assembly line" system for filmmaking); and feared gossip columnist, Louella Parsons.
Genre: Drama, Romance
Director(s): Peter Bogdanovich
Production: Lions Gate Films Releasing
  1 win & 1 nomination.
 
IMDB:
6.4
Metacritic:
63
Rotten Tomatoes:
74%
PG-13
Year:
2001
114 min
£3,176,936
Website
388 Views


if you experience the following:

you see yourself as the most

important person in any room;

you accept money

as the strongest force in nature;

and finally,

your morality vanishes...

without a trace.

Well, thank God none of us

have been infected, eh, WR?

Umm... yes.

Thank God for that.

Charleston, everybody!

Come on, Pops,

let's show 'em how it's done!

You bet!

What are you looking at?

Oh, I'm tired.

Let's sit down.

Sit? I want to pound my feet so hard

the devil will complain.

Come on, Jay,

take us to the moon!

They've just shot all this

a couple of days ago.

I haven't seen

any of it yet.

Shh!

It's wonderful...

There!

You see that throne?

That throne

is from the 1 6th century.

That's King Lewis II.

I brought that over from Hungary.

Honey, you're wonderful.

Just wonderful.

Get in there!

- Ow!

Wow, Marion, look at you!

Yeah, but that movie

sure went in the shithouse.

Okay, Willie's at the wheel

for two hours so who's first?

- I am!

- Hands off, you little tramp!

Marion, you always have

the best moonshine.

That's because every hour,

bottles arrive from her many admirers.

Well, this one sure's got

sex appeal. Who gave it to you?

Who do you think?

Hmm, I see...

Well, it's mine now.

Ahoy there.

Tom, how are you?

Stuffed!

That was some banquet.

Wait until tomorrow. Marion's

prepared quite a birthday feast.

- Marion is a special woman.

- Yep, she is.

It's so hard to love someone

in our business.

There's so many men

who prey on beauty.

And not sincerely either, but

in cruel ways, just for the conquest.

Take a character

like Chaplin for example.

He's absolutely notorious.

I'm sure you've heard about Lita,

his leading actress.

Mm-hmm.

Apparently she's pregnant

with his child...

she's only 1 6

for Christ sakes!

That's why I keep my Nell

far away from show people.

Women aren't as strong as we are.

They're easily fooled,

their hearts

are easily corrupted.

Yeah, yeah, it is a concern.

It must be, especially...

considering the amount of time you're

forced to spend 3,000 miles apart.

This might be something else

I can help you with.

- What do you mean?

- Well...

if we were to merge

our motion picture interests,

along with

all the other benefits,

I could keep an eye

on her for you.

Hmm...

What makes you think

she needs to be watched?

- Well, she certainly has...

- Is four a crowd?

Not at all. Join us.

You were saying, Tom?

We can talk later.

- Such a charming cabin!

- Good night, everyone.

What a nice man.

Yes. Very nice.

- Here I am with surprises!

- Charlie!

- Let's see what you got, Celia.

- It's dope, Didi.

You had that

the whole car ride?

If I'd told you in the car

that box would be empty right now.

Is it true what they say

about a Jazz man and his instrument?

- Every word, sister.

- Oh!

You're with me.

Come on.

Hey!

You're not gonna be a flat tire

about our playtime, are you?

You do as you like,

Marion, dear.

Just don't expect me to join you

in such infantile nonsense.

Frank, I admire your marriage.

So simple... clean.

- Thank you, WR.

- Nothing complicating things.

Frankly I feel uninteresting

compared with the...

colorful lifestyles

of your other guests.

Lord knows what

they're all up to at this hour.

Frank,

I won't hear such talk.

The codes of decency are something

to be held in high regard.

We should feel no shame for not being

as liberal-minded as the rest.

Darling, please.

No disrespect, but you know what

one of those actress persons

- Said to me at dinner?

- What?

She had the gumption

to ask if Frank was my lover!

- No!

- Yes!

What did you tell her?!

I said, "Mr. Barham is my husband,

deary, we're not lovers."

- You set her straight.

- The thought of such a thing!

Among the finest

I've ever tasted, Celia.

The absolute finest.

- Who is it?

- It's me.

If you say,

"It's Tom Ince

to see Ms. Margaret Livingston

alone in her cabin

on a Saturday night,"

you'll get a big surprise.

It's uh...

Tom Ince to see

Miss Margaret Livingston

alone in her cabin

on a Saturday night.

I suppose that's the best

I'll get out of you.

...He said it was a sausage!

All right, everyone,

time for charades!

We call them "sha-raids."

These are the subjects

I've prepared.

Well...

We will be one team.

Very well.

Didi and Celia

will be team two.

- What a gyp.

- Shut up!

Come on, Marion. Choose.

Two medical students

I once knew.

- Let them get started.

- Noo...

"Indian Love Call,"

by Harback and Hammerstein!

- Guppies!

- No, no.

King and Queen Tut!

There was no Mrs. Tut!

- Oh oh oh!

- Oh, he's getting her now.

Concubines!

Oohh!

I know! Sex!

This charade

is being misread.

Marion, come outside

so I can explain it to you.

Now, Marion,

what's going on?

I promised myself

this wouldn't happen.

You had to promise yourself?!

I don't know,

l... can't think straight.

Have you slept with him?

- No.

- Have you?!

- No!

- Thank God.

You're not

in love with him?

He thinks

he's in love with me.

Charles is only capable

of a monogamous relationship

with his own movies.

But I want

to trust him before l...

Before you what?!

Listen to what you're saying!

You know, Willie's the first man

who ever had faith in me.

And I'm all he's got

keeping him a human being.

I think he'd... he'd...

he'd die if I left him.

I think he would.

And you think Charles Chaplin

would die if you left him?

Charlie might cry

at my grave

and recite

some lousy poem he wrote.

But give him a day or two

and he'd be back in the market.

A day or two?

Charles would copulate

with a reasonably attractive

pallbearer.

What is it, baby?

I'm sorry.

No. Don't be sorry.

- It's just that...

- Talk to me.

- It's just what?

- Everything.

- I feel like it's all slipping away.

- What is?

Everything. Me.

Tonight Hearst called me

a cripple in the picture business.

- That's a lousy thing to say.

- Do people see me as a cripple?

- No.

- Or a credit hog?

- No, honey.

- Oh God...

I used to be a force

in this town.

- You are a force.

- Not too long ago.

I used to make 40 pictures a year.

Now I'm lucky if I

can get one off the ground.

- God, I need him so badly.

- You'll get him.

- You think so?

- I know so.

- Do you?

- Yeah, I know it.

You're a force.

- I am, aren't I?

- You are.

Marion must think

you're a lousy kisser

or else she'd be back by now.

Hey, Charlie,

you look just like

Adolphe Menjou in this ad.

That's 'cause

it is Adolphe Menjou.

No wonder I never heard

of the picture. Who wants to see

a Charlie Chaplin production

without Charlie Chaplin?

Type it up, will you?

Sh*t.

Just be strong

and keep telling him no.

- Understand?

- Yeah.

Four people on the bed

and Chaplin's the only one asleep.

That's something

you don't see every day.

WR?

A wire's come through

from the New York office.

It's an item

that will be published

in tomorrow's

New York Daily News.

- Grace Kingsley.

Rate this script:3.0 / 2 votes

Steven Peros

Steven Peros is an American playwright, screenwriter, director, and television writer. He is the author of both the stage play and screenplay for The Cat's Meow, which was made into the 2002 Lionsgate film directed by Peter Bogdanovich and starring Kirsten Dunst, Eddie Izzard, Edward Herrmann, Cary Elwes, Jennifer Tilly, and Joanna Lumley. Additional Film Writing credits include his directorial debut, Footprints (2011), which was hailed as "One of the Ten Best Films So Far This Year" by Armond White, Chairman of the New York Film Critics Circle and was similarly praised by critics Kevin Thomas, F.X. Feeney, Mick LaSalle, and White during the film's initial release. He followed this with The Undying (2011), which he directed and co-wrote, and which starred Robin Weigert, Wes Studi, Jay O. Sanders, and Sybil Temtchine. As a playwright, The Cat's Meow had its world premiere in Los Angeles in 1997 and is published by Samuel French, Inc.. It has been performed in four countries as of 2013. His earlier play, Karlaboy (1994) also premiered in Los Angeles where it received a Drama-Logue Award for Outstanding Achievement in Writing. It is also published by Samuel French.Steven George Peros was born in Brooklyn, New York, and raised in North Babylon, New York, where he attended public school. He graduated from New York University's Tisch School of the Arts with a BFA in Film and Television. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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