The Descent

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Come on!

Look out girls, here we go.

Look to the left.

Paddle!

- Can you see her?

- Mummy!

Come on!

Hold on!

Christ!

Yes!

- Mummy!

- Hi, guys!

Oh, Jessie. Yeah!

That was amazing.

- Oh, you girls were screaming.

- All right, Jessie?

- That wasn't so bad, was it?

- No, it was a piece of piss.

Whoo!

B*tch!

- Bit more, bit more.

- Go on, Paul. Fish her out.

There. Got you.

- You all right?

- Yeah.

It's freezing. I can't feel my fingers.

Heave!

Jessie, Jessie.

Ah, come here. Oh, babe.

It was just amazing.

Would you like to do that?

Come on, Jessie, it's freezing.

Let's go back to the car.

Go with your Daddy.

- I'll just help the girls.

- All right.

It's OK, you go on. We can finish up here.

You sure? Thanks, guys.

I'll see you at the hotel.

See you.

Jess, shall I phone Rachel's mum?

See if Rachel wants

to come to dinner on Thursday?

Yeah? OK.

When she comes round,

she can help us plan your birthday party.

Are you going to invite any boys this time?

Are you OK? You seem a bit distant.

I'm fine.

Jess?

Jessie!

Jessie!

Sh, sh. I'm sorry. She's gone.

- I'm sorry.

- No!

No, no.

No, no, no.

She's gone, Sarah. Shh.

Shh.

Well, it's mud, blood and beer...

or sweet Jesus.

Great. Turn that shite off.

That's frightening.

Listen, we don't have to do this, you know.

We can head back and stay in town.

Get wasted, go to a barn dance.

Now that is frightening.

You're right, we don't have to do this.

But I'm not going to be the one to tell Juno.

She's a piece of work, man.

She always brings us out into the middle of...

Well, look at it.

- She came to Scotland last year.

- Yeah, and left pretty quickly.

Sarah! Beth!

Juno.

You look fantastic.

Ah, come here. Oh.

Let me look at you. Wow!

Everything is going to be fine.

Better. It's going to be great.

Becca and Sam can't wait to see you.

Why don't you go in?

- Give me these.

- Yeah.

Thanks.

- OK?

- Yeah, OK.

Ooh, very nice.

- How is she?

- Well, she's here.

One step at a time, eh?

Hey, hey, hey!

Who are you calling a f***ing cheater?

I'm calling you a f***ing cheater.

Hello!

Hey!

Hello.

- You do look really good.

- Oh, you look amazing.

- Hey!

- Let me put the bags down.

Oh, so nice to see you.

- We're starving.

- OK, go, go.

- What have you got?

- Er, well, there's a bit of...

Sam. Sam.

Thank you so much for your letter.

It meant a lot to me.

Oh, Sarah, look,

I'm so sorry that I couldn't be there.

You know, mid-terms and...

You know, Sam is going to be Doctor Van Ney

in like a year's time.

No!

- Please tell me it's longer than that?

- I am so proud of my little sister.

- Who wants a drink?

- Yes! Me!

- Brandy shot?

- Yeah, yeah.

- So, Beth...

- Mm-hm?

I hear it all starts falling apart past 25?

Is that what they teach you

at medical school, yeah? To take the piss?

- Cheeky b*tch!

- Ow!

Can anyone make me feel any older?

- Oh, here we go.

- Hello.

- Hi, you must be the teacher.

- Beth, Sarah, this is Holly.

Juno's protg?

- I always thought Juno would eat her young.

- Oh, nice.

I'm well able to handle myself,

thanks very much.

I've heard about you.

You're that mentalist that jumps off buildings.

- Base jumping. You should try it, seriously.

- So you live in America now?

Ran out of things to jump off in Galway,

you know.

I'm always searching for the next big high.

- Sure you'd know all about that.

- Sorry?

Juno showed me a photo

of when you used to climb together.

I found this classic picture. Ah!

- Oh, no!

- Oh, no!

- Look at the state of us!

- Oh, my God. That's bad.

Sexy!

Love each day.

Used to be something Paul used to say.

Anyway... cheers.

Here's to our adventure.

- Skol.

- Cheers.

Come on, light, you bastard.

So, have you done Boreham Caverns before?

I saw it in a book once.

It's for tourists. It's not adventure.

Might as well have hand rails

and a f***ing gift shop.

If you're a caver, jumper, climber...

...you just do it and not give a shite.

Or the thing that's bigger than you will get you.

You want adventure, Holly?

When have I ever let you down?

What?

Holly, tomorrow is going to be awesome. OK?

Take this. You need it.

What about Josh, Sam?

Are you guys still together?

Kind of. Sort of.

Different... shifts.

Oh, my God.

- Oh, my Jesus!

- What do you think, eh?

Don't say a f***ing word, all right?

It was a Christmas present.

Shut up.

- What about you Holly? Got a man?

- Oh...

I'm a sports f*** like Juno.

- What?

- Rebecca, too, I think.

But when I'm older,

I want to have lots of babies.

Beth, did Sarah tell you that...

Oh!

Wakey.

Wakey.

I feel like road kill. Give me five minutes.

Five minutes.

Good morning, my little ones.

Wakey, wakey.

- Good morning.

- Is that what you call it? It's f***ing freezing!

Holly!

We're leaving at seven. Don't be late.

Try that.

The queen is dead.

Long live... the f***ing queen.

Beth, you're not driving.

- If you drive we'll never get there.

- Paper, scissors, stone.

- Come on.

- Oh, you're a dick.

- Go on.

- OK.

- There you go.

- No, wait, babe. Best of three.

I'll drive. Right?

Ladies, group photo.

You'd better hurry it up. We're running late.

- I look like sh*t.

- We all look like sh*t. Just give me a smile.

- Hat? No hat?

- No hat.

- No hat, no hat.

- All right.

- Run, run, run, run.

- Say "sausage"!

Sausage!

- Sarah, slow down a bit.

- I'm having fun.

She's having fun.

Whoa! Turn, turn, turn there.

- Let's off road.

- Great.

You should have some water.

Trying to set this watch is impossible.

The buttons are too f***ing small.

- Leave it alone.

- Why do you wear it, anyway?

- My boyfriend gave it to me, it's sentimental.

- It's f***ing mental.

Any guy that gave that to me, I'd dump him.

Juno, are you sure this is the right way?

- Relax, I've never been lost in my life.

- Marvelous.

- So have you done these caves before?

- No.

But they are only level two.

Quite safe, don't worry.

- I wasn't.

- The only danger is that I might fall asleep.

Boreham Caves.

More like boredom caves.

- Nice parking.

- Thanks.

This one time in Galway.

When I free-climbed the cathedral,

a priest chased me

down the whole of the ground floor.

That was brilliant.

- I shouldn't have wasted the effort, though.

Holly, shut up.

Rebecca, leave her alone.

OK, guys, let's get moving. We're running late.

Come on, keep up.

Hey, Holly, wait up.

Move it, short arse.

Oi, Carter, get to the back.

Come on, you lazy bastard.

You finally caught up with me.

- Juno, are we there yet?

- There's a river about half a mile ahead.

When we reach it,

we follow it up to the mouth of the cave, OK?

How does she know there's a river up ahead?

I can't hear a thing.

She can probably smell it.

She came up here last week

to check the route out.

It's rule number one -

file a flight plan and stick to it.

- And rule number two?

- Don't go wandering off.

You think it's dark when you turn out the lights.

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