The Last Flight of Noah's Ark Page #2

My dad. He knew all about animals. He

said you gotta talk slow and easy to them.

- Let them know you wanna be their friend.

- Kid, l don't wanna be their friend.

l hate animals.

They stink, they're dirty and they're dumb

and they're dynamite

when they get scared.

Brutus isn't dirty and he isn't dumb.

Watch out, l'll do it.

- Oh, yeah, you're gonna do it, huh?

- Yeah.

Watch.

Here, Brutus, come on, boy.

Come on.

(lows)

See?

Well, you can put another bug

in his ear, kid.

Tell him if he raises any kind of a ruckus

while we're in the air,

he'll end up on a barbecue.

You're the one that belongs on a barbecue,

hollering at helpless creatures.

- Helpless?

- Come on, Brutus, this is no place for you.

Come here, kid, just watch yourself.

The ramp's going up.

He'll be back. He'll be right back.

- Jimmy...

- OK, kids, we're closing shop.

Everybody off.

Miss... uh... Come on, let's get

the little darlings off, we're closing shop.

Be careful.

Follow me, children.

- So long, Petey, l won't ever forget you.

- You really are my best buddy.

l'm gonna miss you a lot.

And you be careful

and you be a good boy, now.

Yeah.

Well...

Looks like the big day has finally arrived.

- We're gonna miss you something fierce.

- l'm gonna miss you too.

Why can't someone else go to that

old island? Why does it have to be you?

Because l'm a farm girl.

l can teach them what they ought to know.

l gotta go.

Come on, miss, we gotta pull out.

Bye-bye. Bye-bye.

Up you go. There you are.

That captain guy doesn't like animals.

He said they're dirty and they're dumb.

And he'll barbecue Brutus.

She wouldn't let him.

She might need help.

- Are we ready to start?

- Just about.

- Julie, l'm going with them.

- They won't let you.

They'll never see me.

l'll crawl through that hole like the man did.

- But he's started the engines.

- l gotta hurry.

- Bye, Julie.

- Wait for me.

- Hurry, Julie.

- l'm up.

Hurry, Julie.

Julie, l can't make it.

Hurry!

Hurry!

- (he yells)

- Bobby! Bobby! Bobby!

Bobby! Bobby! Bobby!

Here goes nothing.

(inaudible)

(inaudible)

- Who's in that plane?

- What plane?

- That plane!

- Oh... Uh...

lt's Dugan.

Coslough.

Come on, the car.

(laughs)

Look.

They're waving us goodbye.

(inaudible)

They aren't the only ones.

Hold onto your bloomers, honey.

Come on, Coslough. Step on it.

The car!

- Coslough, do something.

- All right, Mr. Benchley.

That'll fix him.

(Benchley yells)

(Dugan laughs)

- Yeah!

- Who was in the car?

Bill collectors.

- You owe them money?

- Not any more.

Must you pollute the entire cockpit,

Mr. Dugan?

Oh, l always smoke cigars

for takeoffs and landings.

That's the tough part.

You'll get used to them, Bernie.

- lt's Bernadette, Mr. Dugan.

- Oh, have it your own way, Reverend.

(Bernadette) Reverend!

lf l were a star

A tiny star

You'd be my starlight

Half of me is me

The other half of me is you

lf l were a bird

A tiny bird

You'd be my wings

For only half of me is me

The other half of me is you

Reaching out

And touching hands

ls a way of sharing

Having faith and caring

Will always see us through

lf l were a tree

You'd be my roots

We'd grow together

Half of me is me

The other half is you

(classical music plays)

Do we have to listen to that junk?

- Junk, Mr. Dugan?

- lt's boring, Bernie.

Bach was one of the greatest composers

who ever lived.

Don't you appreciate good music?

Tell you what, Bernie, l'll make you a deal.

You turn off that noise

and l won't smoke any more.

Agreed.

(music stops)

(she coughs)

Well, we're on course.

So...

l don't believe it.

- Thanks a load, Stoney. Thanks a lot.

- Are we on fire?

Like everything else in this scrap heap,

the automatic pilot is kaput. Finito, finish

Oh, that's all?

Mr. Dugan, don't worry. lf you're tired

and you want a little nap, l can manage.

- You?

- Yes.

- You can fly?

- Yes.

Well, l've had a few hours' instruction

on the Mission's Cessna.

This is a little bit bigger but with some help

from you, l'm sure l could cope.

- Cessna?

- Cessna.

Lady, you couldn't fly this crate with

a couple of hundred hours of instructions.

l wouldn't be so sure, Mr. Dugan. Anyhow,

do what you want. l was just offering.

All right, Amelia Earhart, be my guest.

Just keep your compass at 250 degrees.

That's very good, Bernie, l'm impressed.

You know, it's amazing what a couple

of hours of flight instructions can do.

- Aren't you gonna help me?

- You said you knew how to fly.

- Mr. Dugan.

- Pull up. Up, up!

- l'm pulling.

- Up, up, up, up!

Up, up, up, up, up, up!

(quacking)

What the hell is this duck doing in here?

Just leave him alone. l'll get him.

Bobby! Julie!

- What are you doing?

- Give me him.

We came here to make sure

the animals made the trip safely.

- How'd you get on board?

- Through the Bombay doors.

- What? You might've been killed.

- (lowing)

- lt's Melinda. She seems awfully upset.

- She probably heard about the barbecue.

- Melinda? There's more kids back there?

- No, no, no, Melinda's the cow.

- Brutus's girlfriend. She's getting sick.

- Oh, great, that's all we need.

- What the hell did l get into?

- You shouldn't curse in front of ladies.

- Look, kid, don't you tell me how to talk.

- l better go.

You stay there. l'll handle it.

Keep your hands steady on the wheel

and follow the compass.

- You can do that, can't you?

- Aye-aye, sir.

(whispers comfortingly)

(angry lowing)

Ah, shut up.

All we need is another one like you.

Mr. Dugan? Mr. Dugan, wake up!

Mr. Dugan, Brutus didn't mean it. lt's just

you shouldn't have yelled at him like that.

- (snorts)

- Mr. Dugan?

(classical music)

- Miss Lafleur! Miss Lafleur!

- What? What?

- There's been a little accident.

- l'm scared, Miss Lafleur.

- What?

- Brutus. Brutus knocked Mr. Dugan out.

Oh, no.

OK, OK, OK, children.

l'm sure he'll come out of it.

Just loosen his collar. Julie, perhaps you

can wet a cloth and put it on his forehead.

Let me know when he's OK.

And don't worry. God is my copilot.

l hope he flies better than you.

- Peace offering.

- Thank you.

You're not angry any more?

Ah, what the hell, Bernie. lt's a new day.

ln about a minute, you are gonna see the

most beautiful sunrise you've ever seen.

Keep your eye back there. Back there,

as far as you can toward the tail.

Keep watching. lt happens very fast,

like an explosion, all red and orange.

You've never really seen one

until you've seen one from up here.

- What is it doing over there?

- l don't know, l can't believe it.

lt's not supposed to come in off the wing.

lt's supposed to come off the tail.

Excuse me.

We're still on course.

- We've been flying the wrong course.

- What do you mean, the wrong course?

l mean the battery from this cassette player

has been interfering with the magnetic field

of the compass.

lt's been giving me a false reading.

How long was that hanging there?

l don't know, a long time.

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