The Nun's Story Page #8

Reverend Mother.

I'm at the end of my struggles.

Your sisters love you...

the doctors trust you...

and your students

respect you enormously.

You can cheat your sisters...

but you cannot cheat yourself or God.

Have you struggled long enough to say

surely that you've come to the end?

I think I've been struggling all these years,

Reverend Mother.

In the beginning, each struggle

seemed different from the one before it.

But then they began to repeat...

and I saw

they all had the same core: obedience...

without question...

without inner murmuring.

Perfect obedience as Christ practiced it...

as I no longer can.

Yes?

There are times when my conscience asks

which has priority.

It or the Holy Rule?

When the bell calls me to chapel...

I often have to sacrifice

what might be the decisive moment...

in a spiritual talk with a patient.

I'm late every day

for chapel or refectory or both.

When I have night duty,

I break the Grand Silence...

because I can no longer cut short a talk

with a patient who seems to need me.

Mother, why must God's helpers

be struck dumb by five bells...

in the very hours when men in trouble

want to talk about their souls?

You entered the convent to be a nun,

not to be a nurse.

The religious life must be more important

to you than your love of medicine.

Won't you make one more effort for God?

And for me as His instrument?

I have tried, Reverend Mother.

When I go from here,

I shall take you with me in my heart...

and keep you each day in my prayers.

-Lisa.

-Sister.

Lisa, you often talked

about entering the convent.

Yes, Sister. I'm going to.

You're not entering because

of any personal feeling of admiration...

you might have...

for any of the sisters?

No, not really. I don't think so.

I just wanted to know, Lisa,

because I'm going out.

I felt you were going to.

I'm glad you're coming in.

Is it certain that you're leaving?

I have asked.

What happens now?

I have no idea.

Here's an address.

The underground needs nurses.

-We shall miss you.

-And I shall miss....

You'll be a fine nun, Lisa. Not a failure.

As a representative of the Archbishop,

I must ask you, Sister Luke...

if you are doing this of your own free will?

Yes.

Sister, have you really considered

the seriousness of what you're doing?

Yes.

There are these three papers

to sign, Sister.

One copy is for you, one is for us...

and one is for the papal archives.

Have you somewhere to go?

Yes.

Sister, is there nothing we can do?

Nothing.

From here

you will go to the portress?room.

She will give you further instructions.

You may leave your keys on my desk.

And in conclusion, the dowry

your father gave when you entered.

You must take it.

Go through here to Room 12.

Everything is ready.

Press the button when you are finished

and I will open.

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