The World's Fastest Indian Page #7

thas what they kept telling everyone.

Soon be over.

20 million dead and four years later

it was still going on.

Not as bad

as the big flu epidemic though.

Killed 21 million, that did.

Maybe more.

Every day,

when I left to go to work...

my mum would spray some formalin

on my shirt...

and maybe thas why

I didn't catch it.

Or maybe I was just lucky.

You never know.

- Knock on wood.

- Yep.

You know,

life's a funny thing...

you never know

whas around the corner, do you?

Your shaving brush.

Has had is day.

It won't achieve.

The Modern way.

Burma Shave.

"She doesn't kiss ya

like she used to?

Has she seen

some smoother rooster?

Burma Shave.

These signs we dedicate...

to men...

who've had no date of late.

Burma Shave".

Yeah, thas us.

Well, you anyway.

Look at that.

Thas a cowboy and a half.

I was thinking I'd come out

to the Salt with you.

I'd like to be there

the first time you see it...

is only a couple of miles

up the road so.

Yeah, alright then,

that sounds good.

Looks like there's a lot of people

in town for speed week, huh?

Yeah, looks like it.

This is it, Burt.

We're gonna take a left right up here.

Bonneville...

I mean I can't believe it.

I mean I'm here, I've made it.

I've made it.

You know, all my life

I wanted to do something big.

Something better and bigger

than all the other jokers.

This is it, Bonneville.

This is the place

where big things happen.

Do you realize, Rusty, the fastest

man has ever gone on land is here?

Right here, where we are now.

Malcolm Campbell did it here,

with a Bluebird.

First guy to go

over 300 mile an hour...

and then later his son, Donald Campbell

was here with Proteus.

He crashed at 350 mile an hour

and lived to tell the tale.

John Cobb was here.

First guy

to go over 400 mile an hour.

All the great attempts.

George Easton with Thunderbolt and...

Mickey Thompson

with Challenger.

I'm telling you, Rusty,

this place is holy ground, mate.

Holy ground.

And I made it here.

Well, Burt.

Thanks a million.

I'll be looking for you

in the record books.

You take care out there in Vietnam,

won't you?

I'll be trying.

- Okay, mate.

- Drive safe.

- See ya

- See ya.

God.

Jesus.

- Gidday.

- Hey, there.

- Is going to be a great day.

- Yeah.

Still... no wind.

Lovely day for a run.

Sals in good shape.

Yeah. Firm and dry.

Dead flat. No soft patches.

Not like the beach.

I can do it here.

Yep.

This week.

Is what we're here for.

Wow, is that yours?

Yep.

Gosh, she's a beauty.

I bet she goes fast.

- That yours?

- Yeah, thas an old Indian.

My name's Munro, Burt Munro.

- From down under, New Zealand.

- A long way from home.

Jim Moffatt, San Jose,

California.

- Nice to meet you, Burt.

- Good to meet you, Jim.

Les get to the start line.

The race is about to start

and all the racers are excited.

This car is driven by Jim Moffatt,

San Jose, California.

The other pilots are...

- Come on, guys, 15 minutes.

- Come on.

Come on, les go.

- Morning.

- Hello, Burt Munro.

- Mike.

- Hi, Mike.

- Are you checked in?

- No, not yet.

Well, you've got to remove the shell

before we do the tech inspection.

- Where do I check in?

- Is just over there.

- Thanks, fellas.

- Okay.

I gotta see this.

Hello, I've come to check in.

Munro, Burt Munro.

Registration number?

What?

Registration number.

I don't see your number here.

No, is number 35.

Is on the side of my motorcycle

over there, thas my lucky number.

Have you registered?

No, thas what

I've come over for.

These two blokes sent me over here,

Mike and someone else.

Sir, registration closed

last month.

If you haven't registered,

I'm sorry, you just can't run.

I can't run?

Well, how was I supposed to know

I should have pre-registered?

I've come a heck of a long way

to ride my bike.

I'm not going anywhere

until I've done just that.

I've come all the way from New Zealand,

you know. Is a long way.

Look, mister,

we don't make the rules.

An event like this doesn't just happen

in one day, rules are rules.

Entries closed July 31st.

Well, crikey, I live in Invercargill,

is half way round the bloody earth.

How was I supposed to know these things?

I didn't know all this stuff.

Sir, is not our problem.

I thought I could just turn up here

and have my bike timed.

- You don't have to call me...

- Well, you thought wrong.

Jim Moffatt!

Is Burt, Burt Munro.

Can you come over here, mate?

I'll be right back.

I need a bit of help.

Hey, Burt. Whas up?

Well, I have these blokes telling

me I can't run my bike...

because I'm not pre-registered.

- You didn't register?

- No, I didn't know anything about it.

You know how it is Jim,

rules are rules.

- You should have registered months ago.

- I didn't know.

I'll have a talk with these guys later,

see if I can change their minds.

- Your bloos worth bottling.

- I don't know about that.

Look,

we can talk about this later.

Maybe you can let him go

through tech inspection.

Get that out of the way?

Just in case we can let him ride.

You're asking a lot.

Alright.

- Okay.

- Alright.

- Make me proud.

- Thanks a lot.

You give me a bit

of a fright there.

You know these don't look

like high speed tyres.

Well, they are high speed tyres.

Look at these hairline cracks,

these tyres have got to be 25 years old.

- What happened to the tread?

- What?

I said,

what happened to the tread?

Well, I cut it off,

thas what happened to the tread...

I cut it off with a carving knife...

otherwise it wouldn't be

a high speed tyre, would it?

What are you talking about?

Well, you've got to keep the weight in

otherwise when you get to a high speed...

the centrifugal force will

the tread right off, wouldn't it?

I run them on 65 pounds of air and

that tyre's safe up to 300 miles an hour.

I guarantee it. These are high

speed tyres and I made them.

Well, you're going to have

to replace them.

The suspension here is

a leaf spring...

I mean can we pass that?

Geez, last leaf spring on a motorcycle

must have been in the 1920s.

Well, it is 42 years old.

- These brakes look completely inadequate.

- Well, I'm planning on going, not stopping.

Well, the brakes were old

fashioned 40 years ago.

Is this a hinge of a gate post?

No, thas from an old kitchen door.

Let me just ask you what is this?

Is a cork, what does it look like?

Is a cork from a brandy bottle.

You know, the thing is is all about

weight. The less weight, the faster you go.

And where's your chute?

- What?

- Where's your parachute?

I'm not planning on bailing out.

No wait,

you've got to have a safety chute.

Well, I can't afford one.

These forks, if they give out we've

got ourselves some real problems.

I think I'd have a bit of

a problem that way, wouldn't I?

- Where's your fire suit?

- What?

Where's your fire suit?

Good heavens, man,

I don't intend to burst into flames.

Always wear me old suit pants

for good luck.

If they were good enough

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