There's No Business Like Show Business Page #6

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Help yourself.

Won't bother me.

It'll bother me,

but I like it.

OK, Mac.

We're havin' a heat wave

A tropical heat wave

The temperature's rising,

it isn't surprising

She's certainly...

Hold it.

Wait a second.

Hold it, fellas. Hold it.

This is terrible.

Terrible?

No, you don't understand.

You can't

use that song.

We're using it.

We have new costumes

and new arrangements.

Well, it's all set.

It's a big number.

You're joking.

I wish I was.

But Heat Wave's

my big number, too.

It is?

What are

we going to do?

My whole act's

built around it.

I have boys

working with me...

but of course,

you're the headliners,

so I guess it's out.

I'll just have to cancel

and go back

to New York.

No, you can't do that.

What about us?

What about all the things

we're gonna do together?

But, Tim,

what else can I do?

It puts me

in a terrible spot.

Well...

I'll tell you what,

forget about it.

Forget the whole thing.

You go right ahead.

It's your number. There are

lots of things we can do.

We'll work something out.

I'll go talk to the family.

I'll see you later.

I hope so.

And thank you.

Yeah.

I'll see you later.

Whew. That was close.

He had me worried.

Not me. I never had

a moment's doubt.

Gentlemen, the winner

and new champion.

Wow!

We're havin' a heat wave

A tropical heat wave

The temperature's rising,

it isn't surprising

She certainly can

Can-can

She started a heat wave

By letting her seat wave

In such a way that

the customers say that

She certainly can

Can-can

Gee, gee

Her anatomy

Makes the mercury

Zoom

To 93

Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!

We're havin' a heat wave

A tropical heat wave

The way that she moves

that thermometer proves

That she certainly can

What's your name, honey?

Pablo.

Certainly can

Chico.

Certainly can

Miguelito.

Pablo

Chico

Miguelito

Ahh! Can-can

Pablo

It say here under

Weather report

It say

A front of warm air

is moving in from

Where?

Jamaica

Moderately high

barometric pressure

Will cover

the, uh, Northeast and

Where else?

The deep South

Small danger of

What?

Fruit frost

Hot and humid nights

can be expected

St. Vincent, 95

Guadeloupe, 97

Santo Domingo, 99

Martinique

105

We're havin' a heat wave

A tropical

Heat wave

The temperature's rising

It isn't surprising

He certainly can

Can

I started this heat wave

By

Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!

And in such a way that

The customers say that

I certainly can

Can-can

Gee, gee, gee...

It's easy to see

why he did it.

Ow!

Makes the mercury

Rise to

93

We're havin' a heat wave

A tropical, tropical

heat wave

The way that I move

that thermometer proves

She certainly

Certainly,

certainly can

I certainly, certainly,

certainly can

Can-can

Yeah? Then

what happened?

Then after Lew Harris bought

my contract from Eddie,

he sent me out on the road

for a few seasons.

He told me I had

an awful lot to learn

and I talked as if I had

marshmallows in my mouth.

Ha. I liked it.

It was different.

Yes, like green hair.

Yeah.

It's lovely.

You know,

I never thought

anything like this

could ever happen

to me.

Well, anyway...

I guess Lew thinks

I'm ready now.

He's planning to build

a whole new revue

around me next season

on Broadway.

I'd like to build

something around you:

A barbed-wire fence.

Where do you think

we should go

on our honeymoon?

What?

I think we oughta

stay right here.

Then we wouldn't waste

all that time traveling,

and, besides,

they tell me the rainy

season's coming on.

I really have to go, Tim.

It's getting late.

Why don't we get

a sandwich at the hotel?

I'm hungry.

We just had spaghetti

at the other place.

You bought me

breadsticks, remember?

Huh? Yeah. I forgot.

Well, when we're married,

we won't eat out.

We'll bake

our own breadsticks.

Grow our own wheat?

Sure. With a large family,

you gotta cut corners.

Just how large a family

are you planning?

Oh, quartet:

Baritone, tenor,

soprano, alto.

You like the script so far?

You left out

a very important part:

The menace.

Oh, we don't need one.

We'll keep it

light and airy.

What if your heroine

is a career woman,

gonna fight her way to

the top, no matter what?

Then I'll clear

the path for her.

Why, I'm...

trustworthy,

loyal, helpful,

friendly, courteous,

kind, obedient,

cheerful, thrifty,

brave, clean,

and reverent,

and we could

start a fire

without rubbing

two sticks together.

What do you say, baby?

Don't call us.

We'll call you.

Good night, Tim.

Is that all?

Good night.

Oh, I forgot to return

your breadstick.

I'm awfully sorry.

I'll forgive you.

Good night.

Is that still all?

Tim, I had

a wonderful evening.

I like you very much.

I hope you ask me out

again sometime.

And if you want

to kiss me good night...

Mm-hmm.

Good night.

A man chases a girl

Until she catches him

He runs after a girl

Until he's caught

He fishes for a girl

Until she's landed him

It all comes out exactly

the way she thought

Uncertain

He tags along behind

Uncertain

Till she

makes up his mind

A man chases a girl

until she catches him

But don't run too fast

while you are saying no

And once

you've caught him

Don't ever let him go

A man chases a girl

Vicky:
Until

she catches him

He runs after a girl

Until he's caught

He fishes for a girl

Until she's landed him

It all comes out

Exactly the way

she thought

Once you've got him

Don't ever let him

Once you've got him

Don't ever let him

Once you've got him

Don't let him go

"Well, Mom, Latin and I are

finally on speaking terms,

"and I am not as worried

"about the final

examinations now

"as I was a month ago.

"However, I'll be grateful

for all the help I can get,

"so please light

a candle for me.

"Please light

four candles for me.

"I miss you all very much.

"Love, Steve.

"Pax vobiscum.

That's Latin

for "peace be with you."

Let me see that.

You know, it

wouldn't surprise me

if he was top man

in his class.

Morning, Pop.

Morning, Mom.

Would you like

to try

that entrance again?

See, I'm your father.

This lady happens

to be your mother.

Leave him alone, Terry.

He hasn't got anything

straight for two weeks.

Why should he start now?

What's up?

Let him eat.

He needs his strength.

I'll get it.

Hello.

Yes, he's here.

That girl who steals

everybody's material

wants to talk to you.

Shh!

She'll hear you.

Good. Maybe she'll

give me back my song.

Hello, Vicky.

How are you

this morning?

Hmm?

Yeah, it's me.

No, really.

No... no... no... no,

there's

nothing wrong.

It's just... yeah.

Yeah, capacity.

Standing room only.

No, I haven't

had a chance

to tell them yet.

I... I... I...

Excuse me.

Wait just a minute,

will ya, Vicky?

Excuse me, Mother.

Uh, excuse me.

You know something?

I think they're married.

Married? Who?

Tim and that girl.

Didn't you hear him?

"I haven't had a chance

to tell them yet."

What else could it be?

No, no, no.

What do you mean,

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