They're Watching Page #4

you didn't meet Goran

because he's

a real people pleaser.

GREG:
Alex.

KATE:
Jesus Christ.

SARAH:
Oh!

ALEX:
Sorry.

Oi.

KATE:
Watch it, Alex.

ALEX:
Sorry.

KATE:
Great

f***in' day, guys.

Okay, we go to nice

restaurant for dinner.

We meet in lobby

in 50 minutes.

It's time for shower.

Come.

KATE:
I'd say it's

time for a shower.

You are overdue.

SARAH:
Oh, am I

early, Mr. Abernathy?

I thought we had

your interview scheduled

for 7:
30?

Sarah, we still

have 30 minutes.

SARAH:
Oh, that'll

be plenty of time.

I only have a few questions.

GREG:
To sleep!

SARAH:
You can try to sleep,

but I'm not goin' away

until I get my story.

Really?

Mmm-hmm.

SARAH:
Wow.

Mr. Abernathy, that

is quite unexpected.

May I ask you what the

circumstances were behind?

Well the, uh, the terms

of the settlement agreement

prohibit my mentioning

specifics, but, um,

there might have been,

uh, an altercation.

SARAH:
An altercation?

Between myself

and Mr. Torini,

during which Mr. Torini's

eye may have become...

SARAH:
Wait, wait, wait.

You punched Alex?

(EXCLAIMS)

Oh, my gosh.

(CHUCKLES)

So, Miss Ellroy,

viewers are dying to know,

to what do you ascribe

your meteoric rise

in the film world?

Oh, well, uh,

my unique vision

comes from a lifetime

of suffering, naturally.

I, uh, I had to fall

back on my safety school

when Harvard refused me

my private parking space

for my BMW.

Oh!

It was terrible!

The fools.

Fools!

I don't like to talk

about it really, so.

Next topic.

Moving on from tragedy.

Moving on.

I hear that your

stunning documentary work

has made you the

toast of Moldova.

(LAUGHS) Well, as they say,

only filmmaker Moldova,

best filmmaker Moldova.

I've heard this

about Moldova.

(LAUGHING)

You're staring.

I am, yeah.

You like having

the camera on.

I don't

wanna miss anything.

Like what?

Um, what is all

this news about Goran?

(LAUGHS) Seriously?

(LAUGHS) Yes.

All right, um, okay,

you want, uh, come on,

I'll show ya.

Okay.

I won't!

Not even, not even

like one single breath.

If you, if you say

one thing to Kate,

and you get us fired...

(STAMMERS) I don't

even know what I'll do.

I will, I will sell you to

Vladimir is what I'll do.

Girl scout's honor.

She's a girl scout on

top of everything else.

This is amazing.

Now, just remember,

you wanted to see this.

Okay.

All right?

Okay.

Okay.

(FROG CROAKS)

(SPRAYING)

Who's a good guy.

You a good guy?

The little guy.

GREG:
Hey, man, have

you seen Goran anywhere?

I need him for his interview.

No, I haven't seen him,

go ask what's his face.

Disco Dracula.

GREG:
Disco Dracula.

Hey, man.

Greg, my good friend.

How can Vladimir be helping?

GREG:
Uh, I'm

looking for Goran.

Have you seen him anywhere?

I think I see Goran and

your producer in barn.

Come, I take you.

So, uh, Alex tells me

you were in Afghanistan.

GREG:
He does, huh?

Alex has a big mouth.

The reason I ask is

because I have friends

who can get things

into Romania.

And if you have friends

maybe get things

out of Afghanistan, we can.

We can...

(SPEAKS IN OTHER LANGUAGE)

GREG:
Vladimir, are you, uh,

are you asking me to

smuggle heroin for you?

Is camera on?

I... Vladimir would never

suggest such a thing.

GREG:
No, man,

film's expensive,

I wouldn't just be

rolling it like that.

Think about it,

it's all I ask, huh?

Oi!

GREG:
Hey, Kate.

KATE:
Oh, Jesus, Greg,

get the f*** out of here!

Get out of here!

GREG:
I'm so sorry.

KATE:
F***!

(SHOUTING IN OTHER LANGUAGE)

KATE:
Jesus.

GREG:
Goran, don't.

Hey, what the f***

are you doing, man?

GREG:
Nothing.

What the f*** is this?

GREG:
It's nothing.

What?

What's okay,

what the f*** is this?

VLADIMIR:
The

camera is not on.

We were just talking

about this, it's not on.

GREG:
It's not on,

it's fine.

(VLADIMIR SPEAKS IN

OTHER LANGUAGE)

GREG:
I just need you

for an interview.

GORAN:
F*** off!

That's the face,

that is why I do this.

It is for that face.

Your shock sustains us.

What?

It's a beautiful thing.

(CHUCKLING)

I can't believe you

guys didn't get fired.

We get fired?

Why would we get fired?

She's the one got soccer

dick up her snooze hole.

What do you think

she's gonna tell

your Uncle Wallace

back in New York,

that I walked in on her

f***in' the buyer's

boyfriend? Come on.

(BLOWS RASPBERRY)

This is like...

This is our, this is our

get-out-of-jail-free card.

And we only show it

to pretty much everybody

we meet, so...

Yeah, only, only

pretty much everybody.

What would she

have done if Goran

would've been there today?

She would have been fine,

she's a total pro.

She just would

have been like...

Stop!

Goal!

(LAUGHING)

Okay, can you just...

Wait, can you come here

and play this, like, last

part just one more time.

Why, is it workin' for you?

Is this gettin' you hot?

No, there was, can you...

There's just, like,

something that's bugging...

(KNOCK AT DOOR)

...me a little bit

at the end.

Yeah?

KATE:
Dinner,

dummies, let's go.

We're comin'.

All right, Kate.

Next time, Sarah provoked.

Let's go eat.

Uh...

You guys, what am

I gonna do with this,

like, laptop?

Okay, wait up, guys.

(SPEAKING OTHER LANGUAGE)

SARAH:
Um. I'm sorry,

ma'am, could you...

(SPEAKING OTHER LANGUAGE)

(SPEAKING OTHER LANGUAGE)

And now go,

now go home. Go!

What the frick?

You guys, did you see

that old lady upstairs?

(LAUGHING)

Oh, my God, finally,

I'm starving.

Come on, guys, let's

go, she's here.

SARAH:
Did you

guys not see her?

Hey, Sarah, come on,

let's go, we're eating.

SARAH:
Greg, that lady

that was your mom is

upstairs right now.

It doesn't matter, look,

come on, we haven't eaten

since Berlin.

(SPEAKING OTHER LANGUAGE)

Best restaurant in town.

Of course, only restaurant

is best restaurant.

Huh, come on.

GREG:
What's it,

what does it mean?

It means the Burning Stake.

GREG:
Okay, good

enough for me.

They're gonna burn my steak.

All right.

SARAH:
What?

This is the table.

KATE:
This is the table.

ALEX:
Hi, Buddy.

SARAH:
Sh*t, Greg,

those are the guys

who were at the church.

Sit down, don't worry.

Just don't make eye contact.

Dude, dude, how 'bout

takin' those guys on?

Don't make eye contact.

They look like

cool guys.

KATE:
Let's just order

some food. Can you get

the waitress?

Vodka, vodka, vodka.

KATE:
Vodka all around.

ALEX:
Vodka,

vodka, vodka, vodka.

All right.

Sarah, get in on this.

Becky's tomorrow.

SARAH:
Yeah, I want one.

Amsterdam for three days

and then, God bless us,

back in the States.

Hey, to the States.

Hey, to the States.

SARAH:
States.

Amsterdam. Amsterdam.

Famous Soviet magic trick

make vodka disappear.

Watch, focus pocus.

(CHUCKLES)

Focus pocus?

(LAUGHING)

It's disappear!

I know that trick,

I know that trick.

Cheers.

I'm a magician, too.

Two sevens in a

row means bad luck

for the rest of your life.

Okay, well,

two sevens in a row

means I get to roll again.

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