Today's Special Page #3

come to this place.

I can't believe

you brought me here.

Samir:
Hey, hey,

listen to me.

This is too greasy.

Okay? Look at this grease.

Look at that, okay?

It's too much.

The customers

are complaining.

Okay? Too much ghee.

Ghee. Ghee, there's

too much ghee. Too much.

I'm talking to you here.

And this. This is

a health violation,

all right?

This has to go in the trash.

Okay? It's disgusting.

Oh!

F***!

F***! Look at this.

F***?

Look at my shirt?

F***?

You f*** to me?

What?

I f*** to you.

What?

You f*** to me,

I f*** to you!

I f*** to you!

What? Where

are you going?

I finish.

I finish.

Where are you going?

What's he...

What are you doing?

Hey.

Hey, hey!

Come back. What the...

Don't speak to me!

Hey, hey, you can't quit.

Health violation...

This is your job!

Big sh*t, I am leaving.

What? Okay, come back.

That's over. Over!

Uh-uh, come finish.

Hey!

Great!

Just be a few more minutes.

Tikka masala, tikka masala.

Okay. Onions, garlic...

Okay, onions.

Um...

Onions... Ah!

Onions.

Okay, lamb, lamb, lamb.

Is this lamb or beef?

Yes?

No, what kind of meat is this?

Yes?

Thanks for your help.

Let's call it lamb, shall we?

Yes?

Thought so.

Okay. Garam masala.

Garam masala.

No.

Garam masala?

Garam masala?

Yeah. Okay.

Thank you, pierre.

Two saag paneer,

one palak paneer,

one chicken vindaloo.

Yeah, seven naan.

Seven, okay?

Yeah, it's tandoori palace,

7414 37th avenue. Yeah.

I know it's an

indian restaurant.

Just come to

the back. Yeah.

Okay, credit card is...

Oh! Oh, sh*t!

Have you any idea

how many taxi drivers

There are in new york

named akbar?

Okay, well,

He said he was an amazing cook

And he used to cook

for indira gandhi.

No, man, good luck to you.

Well, I guess

I'll just have

to go and beg

Munnamia to come

back and cook for us.

No wait!

No, no, no, no.

Wait, wait, wait.

Wait, wait, wait.

Whoever he is,

we'll find him.

Whoever he is.

Wow!

Hey!

Um, thank you very much.

Look, this would not be

a permanent position

or anything like that.

Oh! That's perfectly

all right.

I've never had

a permanent

position in my life.

Oh.

Oh, that's quite

an accomplishment.

Okay, so it's a standard

menu, pretty much.

Whoa, what is it?

What are you doing?

Hmm! Masala.

Masala is the soul

of indian food.

And food is the soul of india.

Smell it.

Of course you

can't really tell

until it's in the oil.

The masala is the symphony,

And the oil is the orchestra.

The greatest

chef in the world

taught me that.

Really, who?

My mother.

Come on,

come on! Move!

A man should have

three passions in his life.

His country,

his religion

and his cricket.

What about his wife?

Wife is not a passion.

Wife is an expense.

Oh, man.

Oh, there.

It was wonderful!

We're going to

tell everyone we know.

And she knows everyone.

Good night.

Thank you again.

Lovely!

Wonderful meal!

Good luck to you.

It's been a pleasure.

We'll see you again.

Okay, bye-bye.

Thank you.

Thank you very much.

Thank you.

Woman:
Oh! Lester,

what's gotten into you?

Delivery man not back yet.

Oh.

And we have backup.

Uh, backup? Well,

who goes usually?

It's never happened before.

Oh, man!

Oh, no!

You okay...

Oh, samir?

Hey, hi.

Hi. Yeah.

Are you okay?

Yeah, I'm fine.

Well, what...

What are you

doing here?

Oh, we live here.

We live over

on 78th street.

And this is my

daughter, abigail.

Oh. Hi, abigail.

Well, what are you doing here?

I mean, shouldn't you

be off in paris making

terrines or something?

Yeah, no, I'm doing that.

Yeah, I just got

a little bit delayed.

Just had a family emergency.

Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.

No, it's totally fine.

It's all good.

Oh, god!

Okay. Well, maybe

"fine" is not the word.

Mmm, this is really good.

Really?

Yeah, it's...

Where's this from?

Um, well, it's...

My family owns

a restaurant

On 74th street.

Tandoori palace.

That's why I'm helping

out making deliveries.

I know that place,

I used to go there

all the time

When I first moved

here from buffalo.

But I don't remember

it being this good.

Back then, all

I could afford was

the free papadam.

Um, we're going this way.

Oh, okay.

But...

Pumpkin,

look at your face.

It's all over you.

Do you mind?

I need to get

a wet nap for her.

Uh...

Please?

Okay, okay. All right.

Thanks.

Hi. Hi, pumpkin.

Thank you.

Hi.

All right.

Oh, gosh!

Uh, you know what?

I actually have a napkin.

I think

I can probably

take care of it.

There you go, there.

She has very good taste.

It's one of our most

favorite dishes.

Okay, I think she's clean.

Well, thank you.

Say, "thank you."

Thanks.

And, uh...

Okay, I'll see you.

See you.

See you around. Yeah.

Good to see you.

Hey.

Get together sometime

and get a bite to eat.

Yeah, sure.

But only because

we're neighbors.

Right.

And I'm off on wednesdays.

Yeah, I know.

I made the schedule.

Thank you.

Everything was delicious.

Thank you.

I've never tasted

curries like that.

Well, that's that.

Shall we settle up?

Yes. So, I was hoping

that maybe you'd

come back tomorrow

Or finish out the week

if you're free.

Well, yeah,

of course I'm free,

but as for coming back,

I'll think it over. Hmm?

Well, when will you

know for sure?

Um...

Tell you what,

may I borrow your pen?

Hold that for a second.

I'll give you my address,

You come over

to my house

tomorrow morning,

And we'll discuss

issues large and small.

Hakim:
Wake up! Samir!

Wake up!

Ow!

Wake up, samir!

Wake...

Okay, all right, okay.

What's happening? What?

Go, wash yourself.

It's time for

morning prayers.

When did you become religious?

Hakim! Hakim,

are you all right?

Please, woman,

you stay out of this.

I'm teaching our son

how to say his

morning prayers.

When did you become religious?

Just follow my movements, huh?

Okay.

I'm going

to pray aloud.

No, no, no.

Don't be crazy.

Come on.

Shh!

This is...

Stop talking.

Okay, just be

careful, all right?

Follow my hands.

Allah...

You see! You see?

This is what happens.

Okay? You can't do this.

Come on, hakim.

Would you just,

please, sit down.

Don't do this.

Sit down!

Jesus!

Never mind bloody jesus.

Jesus is not going

to teach you namaz.

Nobody is going

to teach you namaz!

Only me, your father.

Please, please, woman, please.

You have never

wanted to learn

anything from me.

Never wanted to

listen to me about

anything in life.

Okay, okay.

Please stop.

And now, now...

Okay, you know what?

I'm done. Okay?

I'm out of here.

All right, I have to go.

Beta, it's 6:
00

in the morning.

I'm meeting someone

for breakfast.

Meeting?

Whom are you meeting?

Samir:
Nobody you know.

See what you did?

Now he has a meeting.

Please, please, woman.

I'm sorry I'm a little early.

You're right on time,

my friend. Come on in.

That was a present

from the granddaughter

of a maharaja.

Oh! Wow,

it's beautiful.

You didn't need

to go to all this

trouble, really.

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