Twist of Faith

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State your name for the record.

Dennis Gray.

- Where were you born?

- Toledo, Ohio.

- What year?

- '48.

And where did you attend school?

St. Charles grade school,

Central Catholic high school.

And what did you do after graduating

from high school?

I went into seminary - St. Gregory, Cincinnati.

Why did you decide to go into the seminary?

I decided that it would be a good life

if I was a priest.

See that.

We just got back from a fire. It was fun.

Little attic fire. Wasn't much, but I'm filthy.

This is the infamous fire pole.

Every little kid's dream.

- Tony!

- Yeah?

Fire safety. Time to go!

Anyhow, time to go.

Any of you know what monsters look like?

- They're slimy.

- Are they slimy?

- Are they really big?

- They have 10,000 eyes.

A lot of eyes? They got blinking stuff on them?

What I want to show you is that

what you might think a monster looks like,

is a lot what a fireman looks like

when he comes to your house at night.

OK, more or less like a monster?

No!

If you put the neck on.

- What about now?

- Now!

What about now? Look. Am I a monster?

No!

This is me coming into my neighborhood

every day for the last six months.

This is a nice park - one of the big things

that attracted us to the neighborhood.

Right in there, there's a walking trail,

public grade school's way back in there.

It's like living in the forest.

Hi, honey. Your hair looks great.

Thanks!

Mitch. Hey, Sam.

You guys go in the family room.

What makes it all worth it, right there.

Hey, Daddy, I can do somersaults.

- You can?

- Yeah. Watch.

All right.

Salt of the earth.

Mitchel? You gotta go to bed.

Remember that secret

you were gonna tell Mommy?

Here, Mitchel.

Go. Go fast. She won't even see you.

- Tell me about Tony Comes.

- Just a friend.

A good friend?

He was a friend.

- And how did you know Tony?

- He was from school.

- What school?

- Central.

- As a student?

- Correct. And as a fireman.

You knew him when he was a child, right?

Teenager.

And you ever take him out to the cottage?

He would come up different times.

He'd usually drive himself.

What kind of relationship did you

have with Tony?

More of a counselor.

He got us out of a lot of trouble.

He got me out of a lot of trouble.

You're late for class, you go to his office.

He did a lot of fun sh*t. He took you

to the racetrack, he took you to...

He took me out to eat.

In a family of seven kids, we didn't

eat out much. McDonald's was a big deal.

He'd pick on you.

His constant comment to me was,

"Comes, you're the only person I know

that would f*** up a wet dream."

At the time, it was, "Ha-ha, funny."

Now it's, OK, he mentions "wet dream."

And he said it all the time.

Was this part of some conditioning process?

It screws with you to the point where

you wonder, "How much was I manipulated,

"and at what point did I graduate

"to the 'Now it's appropriate

to f***ing try something with this kid'?"

Did the church ever provide you, or any

of the Catholic schools at which you taught,

any guidelines as to what conduct was

considered to be inappropriate with a minor?

No.

Did they ever advise you as to when, if at all,

- child abuse should be reported?

- No.

Did they ever advise you when, if at all,

sexual contact with a minor

should be reported or to whom?

Nope.

The place I was first molested

is the rectory at St. Joseph.

Every day I gotta go to my psychologist's

office, I gotta drive by this place.

An invitation to Denny Gray's cottage was...

That was where it was at.

You could smoke, you could drink,

rake a pile of leaves 12 foot high,

dump a half a can of gas on it and light it,

and nobody gives a sh*t.

It was f***ing cool.

And once I started getting abused,

for one reason or another,

I convinced myself

that that was still the better option.

Which I don't quite get.

Did you ever put your penis

in the mouths of any students

- when you were at central Catholic?

- Objection. Fifth amendment. Do not answer.

Did you ever put the penises

of any of your students in your mouth...

- Same objection.

- ...while at Central Catholic?

Do not answer.

Did you ever put your penis in the anus

of any of your students...

- Continuing objection.

- ...while you were at Central Catholic?

Continuing objection. Do not answer.

If you can imagine laying there

as still as can be, just...

I was asleep and then, as I came to,

I was like, "Oh..."

Realized what was happening

and just kept my eyes closed

and waited for it to be done.

And by done, I mean done.

It's like there's a siren going off in your head

"this is not happening, this is not happening,"

yet, the reality that it is happening

and you're trying to figure out why

and what the hell do I do?

And being so confounded that you do nothing,

that you just f***ing freeze.

And then the shame, after,

or now, at 20, or you know, 33 years old,

that I didn't sit up and just f***ing punch him

square in the face.

You know?

You're still feeling yucky?

- Your teeth hurt?

- Yes.

Yeah?

So what do I need to ask Grandma?

- To check my teeth.

- Check your teeth for what?

To make it... to see if it's better?

- To see if it'll get better?

- Yeah.

What do you think is wrong?

When I was lying in bed, it started hurting.

When you were sleeping

it started hurting?

Does the cold water make it hurt more?

Open your mouth. OK.

Is there blood on my hand?

Breathe.

Can you breathe? Breathe.

Take a sip.

One of the reasons

that I fell in love with Tony...

Sorry, I'm not exactly centered.

One of the reasons that I fell in love

with Tony was...

because he really did wear

his heart on his sleeve.

And unlike a lot of men, he was

very comfortable sharing his feelings

about me, about life...

Which was the complete opposite of me.

By the time we were married,

I had found out that Tony had been abused.

It was the first moment I had heard

Dennis Gray's name.

And I never knew.

Sorry. Trying not to cry.

I never knew how deeply...

that name would be ingrained

in our lives forever.

Tony and I had bought a new house

and I remember...

we'd been here a couple of days

and I was out shopping

for things for the house.

My cell phone rang and it was Tony,

and he said,

"You're not going to believe

who lives five houses down from us."

And I said, "Who?"

He said, "Dennis Gray."

It was a horrible summer.

Daddy! Dad!

I can jump on the jungle gym!

I gotta watch out!

Daddy!

Because of the situation,

we had to tell our daughter

what had happened to Tony.

What's going on?

You think something's up?

You know how Mom and Dad tell you...

to cross your legs when you sit down

and don't let other people see your underwear,

your privates are your privates

and if somebody touches you there,

tell a big person.

Well...

a long time ago,

when Daddy was a little bit older

than you are,

somebody did that to Daddy.

To me.

And today...

the person who hurt Daddy a long time ago,

Daddy saw that person.

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