VeggieTales: King George and the Ducky

Season #2 Episode #13

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(The episode opens on the countertop with Jimmy and Jerry Gourd, who are disguised respectively as Bob and Larry.)

Jimmy:
Hi, kids! And welcome to VeggieTales! I'm Bob the Tomato!

Jerry:
And I'm Larry... (Jimmy nudges him) the Cucumber!

Jimmy:
And we're here to answer your questions!

Jerry:
Right!

Jimmy:
Now, we got a letter today, from a kid named, uh... Jimmy, who lives in a place near... texas somewhere.

Jerry:
Yeah, texas!

Jimmy:
Now, this kid, Jimmy, says that he knows this other kid named, uh...

Jerry:
Jerry!

Jimmy:
Yeah, sure! Jerry! This other kid named Jerry! Now, Jimmy says that this kid, Jerry, is soooo selfish, one of the most selfish kids in the world, so selfish, it just makes you sick!

Jerry:
No. No, he's not.

Jimmy:
Who's not?

Jerry:
Jerry. He's not selfish, he's nice.

Jimmy:
No! He's selfish! Remember? The letter?

Jerry:
Uh, no! Jimmy said that Jerry was nice, while that other kid... Hubert was selfish!

Jimmy:
Hubert?

Jerry:
Yeah, Hubert.

Jimmy:
Who's gonna name their kid Hubert? Look, Jerry- er, Larry! In the letter we got today from that kid Jimmy who lives near texas somewhere, he said that his friend Jerry was selfish! That's what it said, remember?

(Jerry is now grumpy as his Larry mask falls off.)

Jerry:
You wanna piece of me?

Jimmy:
Hey! Whoa! Oh, man! You're the one that said Jerry! I was gonna-

Bob:
(Off-screen) Hey! What's going on here?

(Jimmy and Jerry become afraid when they hear Bob's voice. Jerry looks around worriedly before putting his mask back on, albeit upside down. Bob and Larry then show up.)

Larry:
Yeah! What are you guys doing?

Jimmy:
Uh, hi there! I'm Bob the Tomato!

Jerry:
And I'm not selfish!

Bob:
You're not Bob the Tomato, I'm Bob the Tomato! Jimmy? Jerry? Is that you? What in the world are you guys doing?

Jimmy:
Aw man! We were just trying to help.

Jerry:
Yeah, help.

Jimmy:
We figured you needed a break.

Bob:
Break? I just had a break! I don't need another one.

Jimmy:
Aw, come on, Bob! Please let us do this! We've been wanting to host a show ever since Dave and the Giant Pickle!

Bob:
I don't know about this. I'm not sure I-

Jimmy:
We've got a story!

Bob:
You do?

Jimmy:
Yeah, we do! Jerry wrote it himself, right, Jerry?

Jerry:
That's right, Jimmy. I got a story.

Larry:
Well, what's it about?

Jimmy:
It teaches kids not to be selfish.

Bob:
Oh. Well that's a good thing to teach kids, I suppose. Maybe, if you've got a good story-

Jimmy:
Oh, thanks, Bob! You won't be sorry. You'll see.

Larry:
What's it called?

Jimmy:
Um, it's called, um... I don't know. Jerry, what's it called?

Jerry:
It's called "The Englishman Who Went Up a Hill and Came Down With All the Bananas".

(Jimmy nudges Jerry, which makes Jerry's mask become right side up again.)

Bob:
Catchy.

Jimmy:
Now, if you'll excuse us, we've got a show to do.

Bob:
Oh, okay.

Larry:
Break a leg.

Jimmy:
Well, Jimmy from near texas, here's a story for you to show that other selfish kid.

Jerry:
Hubert! Roll film!

(The screen goes dark, but nothing happens.)

Jerry:
(Off-screen) Uh, roll film!

(Story begins in the style of an old fashioned film, before the story's title comes up as...)

Jerry:
(Off-screen) "The Englishman Who Went Up a Hill and Came Down With All The Bananas".

(Camera pans down to show Scallion #1 wearing an Englishman costume while standing next to a big pile of bananas.)

Scallion #1:
Hello, I am the Englishman who went up a hill and came down with all the bananas, leaving, of course, the inhabitants of the hill with no bananas, and therefore, bestowing the term "selfish" upon myself.

Jean-Claude:
(Off-screen) You're so selfish!

Scallion #1:
I know, but I've got all the bananas.

Jean-Claude:
(Off-screen) Well, aren't you going to eat them?

Scallion #1:
Why of course not! You can't eat bananas without strawberries.

(Camera whip pans over to show Jerry wearing a Swedish costume while standing next to a big pile of strawberries.)

Jerry:
Hello! I'm the Swede who went up a hill and came down with all the strawberries, leaving, of course, the inhabitants of the hill with no strawberries, and therefore, bestowing the term "selfish" upon myself.

(Jimmy comes up to Jerry.)

Jimmy:
You're not Swedish.

Jerry:
Shh!

(Jimmy rolls his eyes and exits the stage.)

Phillipe:
(Off-screen) You're so selfish!

Jerry:
I know, but I've got all the strawberries!

Phillipe:
(Off-screen) Well, aren't you going to eat them?

Jerry:
Oh no! You can't eat strawberries without bananas!

(Camera pans out to show a wide view of Scallion #1 and Jerry.)

Scallion #1:
Pardon me, good Swede, could you spare a strawberry?

Jerry:
Uh, no.

Jean-Claude:
(Off-screen) You're so selfish!

Jerry:
Excuse me, Mr. Englishman, could I trouble you for a banana?

Scallion #1:
Uh, no.

Phillipe:
(Off-screen) You're so selfish! You guys are not so bright!

Jerry:
(Off-screen) The end.

(The screen goes dark, before fading to Jimmy and Jerry on the countertop again.)

Jimmy:
Oh, wow, that was something. I guess it's not good to be selfish, eh, Jerry?

Jerry:
Mmm-mmm. Nope. Not so good.

Jimmy:
Oh, yeah. Let's see if Qwerty has a verse for us today.

Jerry:
Yeah, Qwerty!

(Bob and Larry look at each other in disbelief. Jimmy and Jerry approach Qwerty, who is turned off.)

Jimmy:
Hi, Qwerty! Got a verse? Qwerty? Qwerty? Uh, Qwerty? Oh, great! Somebody turned off Qwerty! Who turned off Qwerty!?!?

(Bob sighs and shakes his head in frustration.)

Jimmy:
Uh, let's see, control, shift, tab, delete. Uh, no, no. Shift, escape, six, option. Uh, no, uh, function, escape, tab, L.

Jerry:
(comes back while holding a cardboard sign with "Don't be selfish" scrawled on it) Hey, Jimmy.

Jimmy:
Oh, would you look at that! "Don't be selfish"! Heh, that's a good one. Well, we're out of time for today, kids. Remember, God-

Bob:
Hold it, hold it! Stop, stop, stop! You can't end a show like that! Well it's way too short, and the story was kinda, little... eh... I don't know. Qwerty's off, and there's not even a verse! No no! This is all wrong, we gotta do it again!

(Bob hops up in front of the screen.)

Bob:
My apologies, boys and girls. We're gonna give this another go around. (to Jimmy and Jerry) Jimmy, Jerry! Take off those ridiculous costumes, we got a real story to tell!

(Jimmy and Jerry do as Bob tells them to, while Larry comes up to Bob.)

Bob:
Larry, do you remember that letter we got from Lucy Thomas of Bismarck, North Dakota?

Larry:
Uh, yeah. The one where she said that she didn't like to play with her little sister because she wanted to keep all her toys to herself?

Bob:
That's the one. I say it's time we taught little Lucy a thing or two about being selfish. What do you say?

Larry:
I say, aye-aye, Skipper!

(Larry hops off, leaving Bob alone.)

Bob:
(sighs) It's good to be back. Action!

(Screen goes dark. Scene opens to an establishing shot of a castle.)

Bob:
(Narrating) Once upon a time, there lived a king. Like other kings, he had a really neat castle to live in and a lovely little kingdom to rule, but unlike other kings, this king spent most of his time, in the bathtub. Oh Yes, His name was George, King George.

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