Wayne's World

Spend all day with us.

There are two--

pardon me--

two of everything in

every Noah's arcade.

That means

two of Zantar,

That means

two of Zantar,

Bay Wolf, Ninja Commando,

Snake-azon,

Psycho Chopper...

It's really good

seeing you, Benjamin.

You haven't been into

Shakey's for so long.

Well, I've

been real busy.

It's two for you

'cause one won't do.

All this week,

kids under 6

get every fifth--

There's a new pet.

Ch-Ch-Chia

Chia Pet--

the pottery that grows.

They are very fast.

Simple. Plug it in,

and insert the plug

from just about anything.

Simple.

Even for our customers

in Waukegan, Elgin, and Aurora--

We'll be there

right on time.

So call!

Clap on, clap off

The Clapper

Wayne's World,

Wayne's World

Party time

Excellent

[ Guitar Riff ]

O.K.

All right,

excellent.

Excellent.

Whoo!

O.K., extreme close-up!

Waa!

Waa!

Waa!

Excellent.

Excellent

extreme close-up.

Now it's time for

Wayne's World's totally amazing

excellent discoveries.

Our guest

is Ron Paxton.

Welcome to

Wayne's World, Ron.

Thanks, Wayne.

Now, you're the inventor

of the Suck Kut, right?

What exactly

is a Suck Kut?

The Suck Kut is a revolution

in home hair cutting.

Wow! What a totally amazing

excellent discovery.

Well, yes.

Fireworks!

Now, Ron, the question that's

on everybody's mind is,

how does it work?

I'm fully prepared to give

a complete demonstration.

O.K. O.K., Garth,

just sit there.

He's going to put that

thing on your melon, O.K.?

Just a trim.

Don't buzz me, all right?

Uhh! Uhh!

Ohh! Ohh!

Ohh! Ohh!

Tell me, Ron.

Exactly how does

the Suck Kut work?

Well, as you can see,

it sucks as it cuts.

It certainly

does suck.

Ohh! Ohh!

What are we looking at?

Wayne's World. These guys do

their show out of their basement.

Ohh! Ohh! Ohh!

Ohh!

Ohh!

People watch this?

Yeah, lots.

Turn it off, man!

Turn it off!

It's sucking

my will to live!

Oh, the humanity!

You want to hand me

the telephone?

Sure.

Uhh!

Uhh!

Russell, this

is Benjamin.

Are you

watching TV?

Listen, could you

turn it to channel 10?

I want you to find out

who these guys are

and where they

do their show.

I think we can

sell it to Vanderhoff.

Take your Ritalin, O.K.?

O.K., you're

in a forest.

Forest?

You're in a forest

with Heather Locklear.

With Heather?

And you're very warm.

Very...

- Warm?

- warm.

These guys

are so funny.

Oh, they're

obviously brilliant.

Hmm.

Wow! What a totally amazing

excellent discovery...not!

Thanks, Ron.

O.K., that's all the time

we have for this week.

Until then, good night!

Party on, Wayne.

Party on, Garth.

It's Wayne's World,

Wayne's World

Party time

Excellent

[ Guitar Riff ]

And...

we're clear!

All right!

Excellent!

Whoo! Whoo!

All right!

Excellent!

Excellent!

Let me bring you

up to speed.

My name is

Wayne Campbell.

I live in

Aurora, Illinois,

which is

a suburb of Chicago.

Excellent!

I've had plenty

of Joe jobs.

Nothing I'd call

a career.

Let me put it

this way.

I have an extensive collection

of name tags and hair nets.

O.K., I still

live with my parents,

which I admit

is both bogus and sad.

But at least I've got

an amazing cable access show,

and I still

know how to party.

But what

I'd really love

is to do Wayne's World

for a living.

It might happen.

Yeah, and monkeys might

fly out of my butt.

[ Horn Honks ]

Ahh, the Mirthmobile.

This is my best friend

Garth Algar.

Hi.

I think we'll go with a little

Bohemian Rhapsody, gentlemen.

Good call.

I see a little

silhouette of a man

Scaramouche,

Scaramouche

Will you do

the fandango?

Thunderbolts

and lightning

Very, very

frightening

Galileo

Galileo

- Galileo

- Galileo

Galileo, Figaro

Let me go-o-o-o

I'm just a poor boy

Nobody loves me

He's just

a poor boy

From a poor family

Spare him his life

from this monstrosity

Whoa!

It's Phil.

Phil, what are you

doing here?

You're partied out,

man...again.

What if he honks

in the car?

I'm giving you

a no-honk guarantee.

Phil! Um...

if you're

going to spew,

spew into this.

Easy come, easy go

Will you let me go?

Bismillah

No! We will not

let you go

Let him go

Bismillah

We will not

let you go

Let him go

Bismillah

We will not

let you go

Let me go

We will not

let you go

Let me go

Let me go-o-o-o

No, no, no, no,

no, no, no

Oh, mama mia,

mama mia

Mama mia,

let me go

Beelzebub

Has a devil

put aside for me

For me

For me

So you think

you can stone me

And spit in my eye

So you think you

can love me and leave me

To die

Oh, baby

Garth, pull over.

Oh! Oh, man!

Come on!

Not again.

He does this

every Friday.

Stop torturing

yourself, man!

You'll never

afford it!

Live in

the now!

It will be mine.

Oh, yes.

It will be mine.

Ooh

Oh, yeah

Oh, yeah

Nothing really matters

Anyone can see

Nothing really matters

Nothing

really matters

To me

Hey, Wayne's world!

Wayne's world! Party!

- Yeah!

- Whoo!

Excellent!

Way to go!

- Whoo!

- Whoo!

Party on, Wayne!

Hey, Campbell.

Uno momento, fellas.

Officer Kuharski,

how's it going?

Fine.

Say, I smell bacon.

Does anyone else

smell bacon?

Yeah, I

definitely smell

a pork product

of some type.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know

what you're doing, Campbell.

Bacon, pig, oink-oink,

police officer.

Ha ha ha.

I said that to cops

when I was your age.

Hey, what

are you up to?

I just pulled over

a tour bus

on its way to Chicago.

We had a tip there was

some drug smuggling going down.

We searched

the entire vehicle.

It was clean, so we proceeded

with body cavity searches.

No way.

Way! I inspected

12 individuals myself--

Inside and out.

Eeew!

Uhh!

Ugh!

O.K., this guy needs coffee

and crullers stat!

We got to get him

to Rampart.

Let's go!

This is

Stan Mikita's Donuts.

Excellent munchie post.

This is

the manager, Glen.

He's here

24 hours a day.

I recommend

the sugar pucks.

They're excellent.

Come on.

I'd never done

a crazy thing in my life

before that night.

Why is it if a man kills

another man in battle

it's called heroic?

Yet if he kills a man

in the heat of passion

it's called murder?

Hello! What do you

think you're doing?

Only me and Garth get

to talk to the camera.

Come on.

I don't really have too much

to say right now.

What's that?

Ohh! Ohh!

Hi, Mr.Withers.

How's the amusement park going?

Just great, Wayne.

Four coffees and

a half a dozen crullers, please.

And one jelly donut.

Hey, there's your girlfriend,

Garth. Yeah.

[ Tchaikovsky's Romeo And Juliet

Fantasy Overture Plays ]

Ow!

Excuse me.

I fell.

Don't you guys ever get tired

of ordering the same thing?

- No.

- No.

Uh-oh.

Don't look. Stacy.

Where?

Oh, God.

I made eye contact.

Psycho hose beast.

Happy anniversary, Wayne.

Stacy, we broke up

two months ago.

That doesn't mean

we can't still go out.

Well, it does, actually.

That's what

breaking up is.

You going to go

to the Gasworks tonight?

No!

- No!

- No!

Don't you want

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