We'll Never Have Paris Page #3

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I hope I was able to help.

Yeah.

Are you thinking about Devon?

I do not even feel bad though.

Maybe I am a sociopath.

I guess we are

allowed to kiss now.

That is so romantic.

Do you think maybe?

We should get ready for bed.

Yeah.

I mean, I am ready but, okay.

Okay.

Whoa.

Um...

I do not really know how to ramp

up to where we were before.

Do you want to talk to me?

Sure. About what?

No, like dirty.

Oh. Oh! Um...

I am good. I do not really have

anything to say dirtily.

Okay. -Why? Did you

want me to talk to you?

No. No, I mean,

if you wanted to.

Do you want to?

Talk to me like that?

Um, sure.

Yeah, that could be fun.

Okay. Yeah. Go for it.

Whenever you are ready

alternatively, take your time.

Let me just set the mood.

Um...

Okay, so...

Take out your cock.

I have not put it in yet.

No, not out of... Never mind.

Oh! Okay, yes. Yes, ma'am.

Alternatively, do you want me?

To address you as something?

No. This is not that.

You know, forget it.

No, hey, I am taking out my cock.

Okay.

Give me that thing.

- What?

- Nothing. I am sorry.

Your hand is cold.

That

feels so good, Kelsey. Keep going.

Thanks, Quinn.

Yeah, that does feel good.

Keep going.

Do it faster, Kelsey. Do it.

Whatever you say, Quinn.

Sorry, this is making me

a little uncomfortable.

I feel like I am in a threesome

with two of me.

Oh, wait.

What?

'Cause my hand feels too good

on your cock?

I do not think I am going to last.

Why, 'cause it feels too good?

Yes, it feels good.

Sorry, I did not make it, Kelsey.

That is okay. I am flattered.

Who are you? What is that?

- Hi.

- Hi, hey.

Therefore, the toilet is broken.

Therefore, I hope you can wait

to go to the bathroom.

Sure.

Um, I was thinking maybe we could

get brunch and go to the beach.

- What do you think?

- The beach. Wow.

They still have

sand at those things?

'Cause I always found that to

be the one flaw with beaches.

Come on. Get up.

Okay, you get ready,

in addition, I... Before we go,

I have to stop at my landlord's

because I lost my

checkbook again.

In addition, the toilet is...

Okay.

What is this?

It is a face scrubber.

It is for Edward James Olmos.

Jesus!

Oh, my God! Perhaps

a sacrificial offering.

You building a pipe organ?

You like my new lipstick.

It called creamsicle.

What is wrong? Is it

something with the toilet?

Quinn? Are you okay, boo?

"Boo"?

Yeah.

I cannot, I cannot.

- You cannot what?

- I cannot go to the beach.

I do not feel well.

What do you want?

I want to go home.

I need to go rest.

Okay.

Are you angry?

Yeah, a little.

Kel, I am sorry.

I just need to go

home for a minute.

Okay.

I am sorry.

Oh, no.

My God.

Please, God, forgive me.

I am sorry.

Help me live with this guilt

alternatively, help me get past it.

I think I had to

do this with Kelsey

to better my

relationship with Devon.

Amen.

Hey. Hey, hey.

Hey, you. Wait.

My bush!

It is for love, man.

Crime of passion.

What a lucky girl.

Devon.

What? What are you doing here?

Are your parents here?

No.

My God!

I picked this flower

from that angry man's garden.

Did you come from somewhere?

Did you come from 1973?

No. I just wanted

to look nice for you.

In addition, you come bearing

a rose that you picked.

What do you think?

I am a florist.

Therefore, you started smoking.

Starting is the hardest part.

Therefore, what made you?

Decide to do this?

I realized that I

couldn't run away

from you and everything else.

The problem

existed somewhere in me

moreover, my fears

of moving forward.

Moreover, you are not feeling

curious about other people?

I was, maybe. I do not know.

I think it was just

that moment, you know,

when you either

turn away or go deeper.

Yeah.

I did think I had

feelings for Kelsey.

Yeah, I knew it.

Did anything happen?

No.

We kissed last night, and then we

did a couple other things too.

Did you sleep with her?

No.

It was stupid,

however, I am just happy

that it is over and...

I mean, it will be a little uncomfortable

with her at work now but...

Are you kidding me?

What?

You are going to keep

working with her?

I need a job, and honestly,

she is just a friend.

You are a f***ing

we are a silly f***! No!

- What?

- No!

- Hey.

- Everything all right?

Its fine, Kurt.

Can you just, please...

You didn't tell me your brother was

home. I tried calling you, man...

He's my brother. You don't

get to call him right now.

In addition, you know what?

You're right.

We have problems that we need

to figure out separately.

- You're not ready.

- No. Wait.

In addition, maybe you should

go be with other girls.

Otherwise, it's always

going to be plaguing you.

I'm not plagued.

Besides, what girls would I...?

Oh, I'm sorry. Let me go and

find some girls for you to f***.

Devon, that's not what I meant.

- I just don't know anybody.

- Just leave.

So now you have to go bone

a bunch of other girls.

I guess.

In addition, Devon's

all right with this?

- She told me I had to.

- Huh.

Kelsey keeps calling, texting.

See? You're magnetic.

Okay, so I'll do that with

the boning. Take a moment.

Then I'll see what the deal

is with Devon. I don't know.

I mean, right now, I have

to get it out of my system,

like a poison.

Very romantic.

It's not

supposed to be romantic.

I need to be a guy,

a guy who fucks girls.

I need to f***ing f***.

I still don't think you should

be with anybody right now.

Maybe we should have

a party here or something.

No. My parents are coming back from

the Dutch house in a couple months.

A couple months...

I'm not looking to remodel.

Look, you just need to

clear your head for a moment.

Why don't we go somewhere?

Like out of town.

We'll forget about girls.

Yes, thank you.

That is what I'm saying.

Great.

Yeah, we'll just go be guys.

We'll go be f***ing guys.

Yes.

This is Fresh Air.

I'm Terry Gross.

The fear of ticks

is taking some of the pleasure

out of walking in the woods...

You ever send

a check to them, NPR?

Yeah, all the time.

Yeah, I gotta do that.

See, those are

the kinda things, you know,

when you're in a relationship,

that just get swept under the rug.

I miss Devon.

- No.

- Yes, dude.

I think I got it out of my

system, you know, with this

and the surrey and

the weird little horse.

Dude, you have to take time.

You know, her

brother won't call me back?

- What? You called Kurt?

- Here you go.

I left him a couple

messages just saying

I hope we can still

hang out and be friends.

- Dude, that is her brother.

- But he's my friend.

- And it's been, like, two days.

- Preemptive.

Oh, my God. Quinn, listen.

You really have to chill out, you

maniac. You have to be alone.

Don't see anybody.

Just take a deep breath.

And enjoy this freedom.

What do I do?

What do people do?

Hmm.

Single.

Pennsylvania, ranch, family...

Beach.

Okay.

Hmm.

All right.

All right.

Sh*t!

- Quinn.

- Hi.

- Hi.

- Hey.

Wow.

Pull up a saddle.

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