We'll Never Have Paris Page #4

Synopsis: WE'LL NEVER HAVE PARIS is a hilarious, clumsy and at once human account of screwing up on a transcontinental level in a noble effort to win back 'the one.' A romantic comedy.
Genre: Comedy, Romance
Production: Orion Releasing
  1 win & 1 nomination.
 
IMDB:
4.6
Metacritic:
36
Rotten Tomatoes:
27%
R
Year:
2014
92 min
Website
92 Views


Whoa.

Howdy.

Wow.

The last time I was in a saddle

was on a horse at summer camp.

I had an anxiety attack and

woke up in the cantor's office.

No pun intended.

Cantor...

See, if they would just put an

Ethiopian restaurant in Ethiopia,

it would solve

a lot of problems.

Sorry, I'm nervous.

Yeah. I am now too.

So you like the beach?

The beach?

Yeah, well, I saw on...

On what?

I saw on...

On Facebook.

Did I, like, write that

somewhere or something?

No, no.

- Do you know what you're getting?

- No.

Sorry.

I didn't follow you here.

I just need a moment.

Kelsey.

This isn't me. I don't

do these kind of things.

Sorry. This is...

I'm the girl Quinn

left his girlfriend for.

And you must be the girl he left

his girlfriend for the second time

after he left me

for his girlfriend.

No. Excuse me.

What is going on?

How did you know I'd be here?

Facebook.

That was a private message.

You're so

non-savvy with computers.

My ineptitude does

not make this okay.

Look, I've been thinking, and

I think you made a mistake.

I mean, that we made a mistake because

this is not rotten at the core,

like there were symptoms of

something gone awry

that we were ignoring.

I think that if we

were just really honest...

Kelsey, wait. Calm down.

I'm just trying to

cool off for a moment.

I don't want to

see anyone right now.

She's nobody.

I'm not seeing her.

Maybe you need to get

your eyes checked again

because I see

the f*** out of her.

You need to grow up.

I'm sorry.

I don't even know what to say.

You can leave now.

I'm not this kind of guy,

juggling women.

Okay.

I think it's out of my system.

What?

What?

What's out of your system?

What are you talking about?

You just said this

is out of your system.

What is out of your system?

You're a pint-sized narcissist.

And I could barely

feel you inside me.

You sure you got it out

of your system? -Yes.

It was never in my

system to begin with.

Try this.

I quit my job this morning

which is a big step.

Yeah, you made a pledge to NPR,

you went on one date,

and now you're unemployed.

I'd call that personal growth.

Yes. I've matured.

You sure you want Devon?

That's all I've ever wanted.

Cheers to that, man.

And it's been good

having you around again.

Cheers, man.

It's spicy.

No, it's good...

Good spice. It's painful.

I call it the Oaxaca dirty bomb.

It's pleasant though, right?

Just like the name suggests.

It's made with

real habanero chilies

that I

cultivated hydroponically.

I'm gonna go get Devon back.

What about your drink?

Hi, Jean. Is Devon here?

No.

Okay.

Is Devon here?

No.

Is she here though?

What the f*** are

you doing, Quinn?

This isn't Anne Frank.

She's not here.

What do you want?

I want to be back with her.

I was an idiot.

I know it now, and I need her.

I'm falling apart.

Hey, man.

Quinn, I thought

when I saw you again,

I would slap you till you had

to have your jaw wired shut.

But I look at you now

and you're like a poor,

pathetic, wounded gazelle.

Thank you.

She's gone.

- Devon?

- She left last week.

- Where?

- Paris.

We have family there.

She got a place.

She's gonna take a semester off

from the university, find herself.

Well, how long is

she gonna be there?

I can't get in

the middle of this.

Hello.

Hi. Hi.

I'm so sorry that I showed up

at the Ethiopian place.

No. It's fine.

What are you doing?

Honestly, trying to figure out

Devon's exact location in Paris

so I can chase her down.

Well, didn't she send flowers

through the shop

to her, like,

grandparents in France?

Their address is

probably in the database.

She's not staying with them.

They don't speak English.

Well, I really just wanted to say I

was sorry for being a total idiot.

No.

Sometimes the healthiest thing we

can do is make a fool of ourselves.

Yes, Quinn.

- Hi. Hey, Kurt.

- Hey.

Listen,

I want to send her flowers.

A housewarming gift. You gotta

let me do that. Please.

I'm an ex-florist, okay.

I know what flowers she wants,

what she needs.

Can I just have her address? I mean,

come on, what am I going to do?

What?

Quinn. Oh, my God! You're...

You're here.

- I am.

- Okay.

Wow. Okay.

- Come on in.

- All right. You sure or...

Yeah. I mean, I assume

that's why you're in Paris,

at my door, with a suitcase.

Yeah. I mean,

if it's a bad time or...

- Come in.

- Okay.

How did you know where I was?

I have my ways.

- This is beautiful, nice.

- Thanks. Yeah.

Thanks.

- I brought you something.

- Oh.

Oh!

- Mmm.

- Mmm.

Right.

- Clogs.

- Yeah.

They're handmade, in America.

Thanks.

How did you find this place?

Well, a couple who

are friends of my mom's...

- It's their son's.

- Oh.

Is he here?

No, no.

He was when I got here,

however, he is staying in Provence

with his family now.

I actually went down there

for a couple of days

to stay with his family and him.

- Yeah?

- Yeah.

What is he... What does him

do, this son? How old is he?

Um, he is 32.

He's a classical violinist.

He tours around with his dad.

It's funny,

I just watched 400 Blows.

Yeah?

Well, no, I'm just saying 'cause it's

French and all, and here we are.

It's coincidence.

Did he play for you?

- Did whom...

- The kid.

Guillaume. Yeah.

Is he okay or...

He was amazing.

What did he play?

Oh, gee, I think

he played some Mozart.

Mmm, Mozart.

Yeah, it's pretty music.

It's interesting 'cause it's

not as technically challenging

as other composers,

you know, Bach and...

It sounded nice.

No. That's the thing.

It does, you know.

Even though it's easier.

So how long are...

- When are you supposed to go back?

- Mmm?

How long are you here?

Oh, I can't remember.

I have to check the ticket.

It's flexible. I mean...

Yeah.

What is happening?

Do you not want me here?

No, it's not that.

I'm sorry, it's just...

Jesus Christ!

I was not expecting this.

Yeah, because it was a surprise.

I'm here in Paris

to win you back.

This supposed

to be my time to...

- Find yourself, I know.

- Yeah.

Well, I came to tell you

that you can stop looking

because you're perfect

the way you are.

You know, this has brought up

many issues for me too.

In addition, I just don't know

if you're ready to be with me.

I am. I, you know,

explored and grew...

Well, I may need to do that too.

Is there...

Did you meet

someone or something?

Wait, you met some f***ing guy

named Guillaume?

In like the last week?

What happened?

Are you with him now?

You don't even know him.

This is bullshit.

It's not bullshit.

So what? It's real love. Okay.

Sorry, I forgot

running off to Paris.

The odds are that

within the first week,

you'll meet

the man of your dreams.

The world

according to Nancy Meyers.

It has nothing to do

with getting back at me.

You weren't even

supposed to be here.

How is this about you right now?

And don't judge my

feelings or romances.

You thought you're in love

with some wannabe model.

She modeled once for Mervyn's.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes

Simon Helberg

Simon Maxwell Helberg (born December 9, 1980) is an American actor, comedian, and musician. He is best known for his role as Howard Wolowitz in the sitcom The Big Bang Theory (2007–present), for which he won a Critics' Choice Television Award for Best Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series, and as Cosmé McMoon in the film Florence Foster Jenkins (2016), which earned him a Golden Globe Award nomination for Best Supporting Actor in a Motion Picture. Helberg has appeared on the sketch comedy series MADtv and is also known for his role as Moist in Joss Whedon's web miniseries Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog (2008). He has further performed in films such as Old School (2003), Good Night, and Good Luck (2005), Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story (2007) and A Serious Man (2009). more…

All Simon Helberg scripts | Simon Helberg Scripts

0 fans

Submitted on August 05, 2018

Discuss this script with the community:

0 Comments

    Translation

    Translate and read this script in other languages:

    Select another language:

    • - Select -
    • 简体中文 (Chinese - Simplified)
    • 繁體中文 (Chinese - Traditional)
    • Español (Spanish)
    • Esperanto (Esperanto)
    • 日本語 (Japanese)
    • Português (Portuguese)
    • Deutsch (German)
    • العربية (Arabic)
    • Français (French)
    • Русский (Russian)
    • ಕನ್ನಡ (Kannada)
    • 한국어 (Korean)
    • עברית (Hebrew)
    • Gaeilge (Irish)
    • Українська (Ukrainian)
    • اردو (Urdu)
    • Magyar (Hungarian)
    • मानक हिन्दी (Hindi)
    • Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Italiano (Italian)
    • தமிழ் (Tamil)
    • Türkçe (Turkish)
    • తెలుగు (Telugu)
    • ภาษาไทย (Thai)
    • Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese)
    • Čeština (Czech)
    • Polski (Polish)
    • Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Românește (Romanian)
    • Nederlands (Dutch)
    • Ελληνικά (Greek)
    • Latinum (Latin)
    • Svenska (Swedish)
    • Dansk (Danish)
    • Suomi (Finnish)
    • فارسی (Persian)
    • ייִדיש (Yiddish)
    • հայերեն (Armenian)
    • Norsk (Norwegian)
    • English (English)

    Citation

    Use the citation below to add this screenplay to your bibliography:

    Style:MLAChicagoAPA

    "We'll Never Have Paris" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 20 Nov. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/we'll_never_have_paris_23171>.

    We need you!

    Help us build the largest writers community and scripts collection on the web!

    Watch the movie trailer

    We'll Never Have Paris

    The Studio:

    ScreenWriting Tool

    Write your screenplay and focus on the story with many helpful features.


    Quiz

    Are you a screenwriting master?

    »
    What does "CUT TO:" indicate in a screenplay?
    A A transition to a new scene
    B A camera movement
    C The end of a scene
    D The beginning of the screenplay