What's New Pussycat Page #4

# Woo her...

# In Vienna.

You must stand underneath her window.

And I shall pretend to be you.

And I shall pour your heart out.

Oh!

We shall halloo her name

to the reverberant hills.

Lefebvre!

Lefebvre!

You are, without doubt,

one of the finest men

what ever breathed.

Who is?

Who is?

I'll soon show you...

who is.

# Dear old pals

# Jolly old pals

# Always together

# In all kinds of weather

Eins, zwei, drei.

That's the one.

The third one, up there. That one.

We must attract her attention.

Direct hit!

Who's there?

"But, soft! What light from

yonder window breaks?"

Psst! "My darling, your face

is like the pale autumn moon."

- You're joking?

- I'm not joking.

- I can't say that!

- Why can't you say that?

- It's ghastly!

- Did someone call me?

I did! Your Apollo, god of the sun,

is calling his aphrodisiac.

- I'm going to be sick.

- But who's there?

My darling, your face

is like the pale autumn moon.

My face is what? Now, who are you?

- Help me. I love that woman!

- No wonder she thinks you're such a twit.

Who are you?

Not addressing you, sir.

Would you kindly leave the tage?

My darling, your face is like

the pale autumn moon. Your face...

- Thank you!

- What did you say my face was?

Your face is like the pale autumn moon!

Are you deaf?

Don't speak to her

like what you done, you rude man.

Give her the nice things!

What's going on there?

- He's saying your face is like the moon.

- My face?

Not your face, you idiot. The face

on the lady what's in the top tower!

Will you shut up?

Come back to bed!

Listen, whoever you are,

you are dull and I'm going in.

- She's going in! Quick!

- We can't get any sleep!

Will you please shut up and go away!

- Go home!

- And you, too! Shut up!

Right! Everybody, inside!

Trickle back to your truckle beds.

Everybody, faites vos jeux.

Ooh! Ah!

Give her something romantic!

Say romantic things to her!

Your name... is like a bell

that hangs in my heart.

May it ring... and swing.

Lefebvre!

Lefebvre!

Miss Lefebvre! Miss Lefebvre!

It's me, baby Fritz, and I love you!

Police!

Help, help!

Police!

And now, group, whose emotional

problems shall we discuss today?

- Me, me, me, me.

- No, mine. Mine. Mine.

Me, me, me, me!

I've been coming here ten months and

we haven't discussed my problem once.

Perhaps if you'd be kind enough

to tell us what your problem is

then we could all have a go

at discussing it or something.

I can't. It's dirty.

Weren't we discussing, last week,

Mr Durrell's relationship with his father?

Actually, we were discussing the dream

about the train entering the tunnel.

Oh,ja, ja. The train in the tunnel.

That was a good one.

By the way, ladies and gentlemen, we

have with us a new member of our group.

He's a young man who has got

certain emotional problems.

All your life you should have such

problems as this young man has got.

He's the editor

of a well-known fashion magazine.

I'm referring to

none other than Mr Michael James.

Ahem.

I haven't been sleeping very well

and if I... if I go without it

I find that, um, quite often,

I, um, fall asleep.

Carole is my girlfriend.

She's part of the whole... perishing thing.

She, um, lies... puts me on the bed.

She... on the bed...

and sometimes she misses

and I go under the bed,

but this is what we describe

as a pot shot and it doesn't count.

Argh! Argh!

- Argh! Argh!

- Quills!

Control your knees immediately

or they'll be shaved within the hour.

Mr Quills! Have you no shame?

Why do you keep attacking new members

in this way, you great fat Moby Dick?

# When it's springtime in Vienna

Quills is a paranoiac.

He sleeps with the light on.

- Pansy!

- Nail biter!

- I prefer the sickness to the cure.

- Early days, Mr James.

- Didn't you mention a dark closet?

- Good idea. I've got one over here.

- Goody, another free-for-all!

-

It's a raid! Run for your lives!

Miss Lefebvre. You look

positively ravishing in that face.

Thank you, Herr Professor.

Group, listen.

I've some marvellous fresh

emotional experiences to tell you about.

You see, the other day...

He told me any time I had trouble

controlling myself to blow this.

You have... trouble controlling yourself?

Only with men. I have an intense need

to be loved by many men many times.

Really?

- A little wine, would you care for?

- Yes.

You'd never know by your placid exterior

that underneath that ice-cold facade

beats the heart of a savage...

lustful... passionate animal.

What will you have

for breakfast tomorrow?

Orange juice, tea and toast.

I have to call someone

and tell them I will not be home tonight.

The phone's down by the bed,

next to my prayer shawl.

Agh!

- I'm sorry about the fight.

- What?

- I decided you were right.

- What, what, what, what?

- About some things.

- What... what did you decide?

- I'm moving in with you.

- You're moving in?

Yes. What the hell's the matter with you?

You now... moving in?

You... in... moving?

Yes, yes.

I am sick of wasting any more time.

You're now moving in...?

You... you've decided...?

Yes. Darling, listen. If we were

living together like husband and wife

maybe you'd see

it wasn't all horrible after all.

- Oh, but it is. It's horrible.

- Michael!

Go downstairs, pussycat, and I'll join you

in a while and we'll have a nice fight.

You don't want me here for a reason.

You're covering up.

I want the moment to be right!

- I want it to be a special occasin.

- Oh, well...

Listen to me. You said your mother

and father are coming next week.

Do you want us to celebrate

us two living out of wedlock?

- I don't think they'd appreciate it.

- Well, look, let's discuss it later.

Something's wrong... someplace.

Well, look what's sleeping in your bed.

As a man's life goes down the drain,

you are there.

Oh dear, all this work I've got to do.

Wash the dishes,

polish the furniture, do this, do that.

I say, I do earn my pay.

Here we go, cock, spotless we must be.

Ah.

Uh, pussycat. I can please explain.

Michael! I had to see you.

You haven't called me

since that last fantastic night.

You hyperthyroid.

Carole! Look, I love you!

I love you, Carole!

It's not what it seems!

I'm opening up a seminary!

Begging your pardon,

I'm going to find the john.

Mm. Ah!

There it is, fine. Good.

Oh, my...

Another overdose...

Um... Um...

Uh, hello, help? Succour?

Um, emergency ward, yes.

My name is Michael James.

Je suis Michael James.

There is an trange... uh...

bird ici... Uh... she...

- Ooh!

- Oh!

Just relax. That's fine.

Take it easy, now.

I'm sorry.

May I ask what is your relationship

to this girl? Are you her fianc?

No, I'm just a friend.

It's a pretty rocky friendship you've got.

Pussycat?

Pussycat?

Do you think you could love a short man?

I mean, if he had very attractive red hair?

Victor, I adore you.

Collected Poems of Shelley.

I always wanted to read...

- Sorry, I saw Shelley first.

- You did not! I saw it first!

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