What's the Worst That Could Happen? Page #8

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for concerning Fairbanks.

- Thank you, Jerry.

- No problem.

Didn't I see you at the Ice

Capades show last Monday?

Come on, Tardio.

I don't do Ice Capades.

The shoes say butch,

but the socks say...

"Hi, how you doin'?"

- Hey, Jack.

- Hey, baby.

- Where's Amber?

- She asked for the day off.

I knew she was upset.

Amber got a pretty good

head on her shoulders.

Maybe you need to listen

to what she has to say.

You don't even like Amber.

Amber and I happen to agree

on this one...

so therefore I say she OK.

- But?

- But?

But you making this thing

personal with this Fairbanks...

and that's bad for business.

And that's the first thing

I taught you about this game.

Kevin, I got two words for you.

- Bankruptcy auction.

- What?

I just got off the phone

with Shelly.

- He hacked into their e-mail.

- Talk to me.

Fairbanks is gonna be

at his beach house...

for a bankruptcy auction

the day after tomorrow...

and after, he's gonna be out of

the country for a couple months.

Leave it alone, son.

This is your old uncle Jack.

If you only listen to me

one time...

for the rest of your life,

listen to me now.

Take it from a man

who raised you from a pup.

Let it go. I seen other guys

go down the road you're going...

and you know

what they call that? Dead end.

Let it go, Kevin.

Goddamn, Kevin, let it go.

Seven million dollars worth

of art, jewelry, and antiques.

I'll drive. Hand me my keys over

there, right underneath there.

Come on, Lutetia.

Don't worry about it.

Nobody even watches

these hearings. Excuse me.

You've gone too far, Max.

Swearing on TV?

You make a fool

out of yourself...

publicly humiliate

the both of us...

and put your entire company

at risk, for what?

Some trinket

out of a crackerjack box?

Look, when I catch

this little putz...

Don't come home, Max.

- What?

- You're a jerk. Grow up.

Where's my lover? All right.

Berger was looking for you.

He found me.

How you doin'?

You're going, aren't you?

Look, Amber,

you gave me something.

I lost it.

I can't have that between us.

Well, I would much rather

have that between us...

than two inches of glass

at some state prison.

I'm sorry, you know?

A man in my position...

You know, you have always

said this is about me.

This has never been

anything more...

than a juvenile

dick-measuring contest.

Wait a minute. If this was

a dick-measuring contest...

I'd be declared the winner.

Baby elephant trunk.

Baby, I'm just playing.

You know

I'm just messing with you.

Kevin, grow up.

He's making me nuts. I don't

know what to do with him.

- So, what's the pre-nup like?

- There isn't one.

Then divorce him.

Cream the bastard.

Oh, I don't know. I don't know

what this says about me...

but I'm kind of fond

of the old dog.

I mean, s...

- Is Jack inside?

- I think so.

Man trouble?

It's always man trouble.

Well, now you got

woman trouble, too.

That's my jacket.

What are you doing with it?

- You're the thief's wife.

- The thief?

- Your husband stole my ring.

- What?

That was my ring,

and I gave it to my boyfriend.

You want your jacket?

Have your jacket.

Wait a minute.

Pull daddy like a chariot.

Look, kids.

Oh, what a beautiful child!

- Thanks.

- Boy? Girl? Doesn't matter.

Lovely child. So innocent.

Damn. Where's that lens?

- What a nice surprise.

- Yes, it is, isn't it?

Hey, you feel like

taking a walk?

Sounds good,

but I got to go see an optician.

Yeah. You know, right now

my eye is acting up.

You're a little blurry

right now.

Really? Is that blurry?

Uh, no. I see that just fine.

That's good. Relax, would you?

This is just an overlap

of two connected worlds.

You never cross your line,

I never cross mine.

Know what I mean, Kevin?

- Damn!

- Just gas. Poor little thing.

Even in the outdoors, huh?

So what's new, Kevin?

Uh, nothing.

Just playing at golf.

Doing that Tiger Woods thing.

You?

Oh, busy. There's still

a lot of crime out there.

Well, I'm sorry

to hear about that.

Especially

after all your efforts.

It can be time-consuming.

I guess that's why I never

took up a sport like you.

Although for some reason...

I've always been drawn

to figure skating.

Speaking of crime, do you know

what crime I hate the most?

- Insurance fraud.

- Oh, yeah? Why's that?

Because the crook is using me.

"Oh, detective,

they took everything...

"and here's the list

of the stolen items...

"and can I have

that docket number...

"so I can claim

my insurance money?"

Nothing makes me angrier

than trying to solve a case...

that never happened.

So you think you got a burglary

that doesn't smell right?

Big townhouse. Beacon Hill.

I'm wondering if the arrogant

son of a b*tch bankrupt bum...

who owns the place

maybe didn't set it up himself.

Yeah, well...

I didn't... I didn't hear nothing

about no scam...

but if I do, I'll let you know.

Do you still blink when you're

not telling the truth, Kevin?

Must be the contact lenses.

Walkies.

Come on, Pix.

We gotta get you a bran muffin.

We're getting everybody

bran muffins. Good, good.

Be cool.

Mr. Man.

Gloria, what the hell

are you doing here?

I drove out here because there's

something I need to tell you.

Here, pick one.

Any one.

- Yep. There it is again.

- What does it mean?

The guy's got five daggers

in his head.

What do you think it means?

How bad is it?

I guess a guy with six daggers

in his head would be worse...

but they don't make that card.

It just keeps coming up.

Why the hell didn't you tell me?

Would you have listened to me?

Do you ever listen to anybody?

Max, put a stop to all of this.

No good is gonna come of it.

- I can't.

- Why?

I can't, I can't, I can't!

Once a man in my position

gives in...

lets his defenses down...

is weak for one single moment,

he's dead.

Dead, you understand?

That's the way it is

with animals in the jungle...

that's the way it is with me.

Oh, cut the crap, Max.

It's only a ring.

A silly, stupid ring!

Yeah, and a bone

is just a bone...

until two lions decide...

that only one of them

is gonna walk away with it.

You know what your problem is?

You always have to win.

You figure out

what it is you want...

and then you'll do anything

to get it...

and when you get it,

you toss it aside...

and move on to the next thing.

I loved you, Max.

I knew who you were,

and I still loved you.

Who else can say that?

You know who you are, and you

can barely tolerate yourself.

Nobody talks to me that way.

Nobody.

- I do!

- That turns me on.

No! Get off me!

Ow! What?

You're doing it again,

you horny little bastard.

Give me a hand.

You hurt my back.

No. I quit, Max. Good-bye.

Come on. Glor...

You quit? You're fired!

There goes

your medical and your dental!

You know what? I don't need it.

And I don't need you.

All right.

- Hello, hello.

- Buzz off.

I was...

Compound secure, chief.

Come here.

I am so flattered, sir.

I've thought about this, too.

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