Where's the Money

---

Listen, la, la,

big city of dreams, baby.

You got Hollywood,

bel air,

silicon beach,

and Beverly hills, right?

Four of the wealthiest

neighborhoods in the country.

And then...

There's south central.

Now be honest,

all right,

when you hear the words

"south central,"

what do you think,

gangs, drugs, guns?

Well, then,

what the hell

are all these rich white people

doing here, hmm?!

You see, six blocks from one

of the most expensive colleges

in the country sits one

of the poorest neighborhoods

in the country.

And that's

where your boy grew up.

We got a family business.

More emphasis

on "family" than "business. "

'Cause we always broke.

20 years ago,

my dad and uncle

started this gym

to keep kids out of gangs

and off the streets,

give them

some positive role models.

Then they got locked up

for bank robbery.

I believe

they call that irony.

That left me and my moms

to run this place on our own.

She done a whole lot of good

for this community,

but doing good don't really

pay the bills,

you know what I'm saying,

and the bank's about

to shut us down.

Over the years we kept

the doors open

with endless side hustles,

and that's where my boy

juice comes in.

We've been best boys

since I was a little jit.

Now juice?

He the plug.

You need anything,

he can get it.

Just don't ask him how.

Why you laughing?

Why you laughing?

But luckily

my girlfriend Alicia

has always been there

to get us back on track.

I mean, she don't know

she's my girlfriend yet.

She got a serious crush on me.

Like, serious crush.

She say she waiting

for a real man,

but if that's not me,

then why she been flirting

so hard?

Look at her!

Look how she looking at me!

Zoom in.

Come on, you see that, right?

So that's life in the hood.

I mean,

we don't have much,

but if I can keep

those gym doors open,

I can keep my little family

together, and really,

that's what it's all about.

Nah! I'm just f***ing with you.

It's about

them dead presidents, y'all!

Get it!

I'm gonna kick your ass

so hard,

you're gonna be able

to give yourself a rim job.

You really wanna

go out like that?

South central, baby.

Yeah, think about it.

It's no game.

You in it right now.

- Let's go.

- I'm crazy.

I'm crazy! I'm crazy!

You will die today!

Now I apologize

for the language, y'all,

but this is the kind

of tough talk

you're gonna hear out

in these streets.

Now of course I could teach

y'all how to fight.

Give 'em a little one,

two, three, four.

But what's that gonna solve?

What I'm uniquely qualified

to teach y'all

is that sometimes your best

weapons are your words.

We're gonna put these down

and pick this up.

Words?

This is the mma class.

So stop being a little b*tch

and let's fight.

Oh, okay, look at this guy.

Little hyped up.

Tone it down a notch.

That's great.

I see what you're doing.

Nothing he says

can provoke me

because I am de-escalating

the situation.

I never thought I'd get

this close to a vagina

- until I was at least ten.

- -What's a vagina?

Look, I'm gonna tell you

one time and one time only.

You gonna sit your little ass

in that corner,

and I'm gonna count to three.

- One.

- - Three!

Whoo! Punched my dick!

Okay, listen!

Oh!

What you-

time out, okay?!

What's up?!

This is my class!

I command y'all to sit down!

Sit down and listen to me!

- What about with my deep voice?!

- Hey!

Oh, that was an accident. Y'all

saw it was an accident, right?

You, you, you.

You look like you know cpr.

Come on, white girl,

go ahead, do some magic.

Go, go, go, check his pulse.

What the heck

is going on here, del?

Listen, y'all don't ruin

this for me.

Just stay tight.

Hey, Alicia.

We're just wrapping up

our session on de-escalation.

He gonna be okay.

And that is how not

to get into a fight.

Oh, man! Whoo!

Watch out for the kid

with the curly hair.

- He is mean.

- It's not a joke, del.

I ask you to watch my class

for ten minutes.

He started it. Hey!

That's the dumbest sh*t I've

heard from anyone all day,

- and that includes juice.

- As promised, I got you a pair

of refurbished Jordans, okay,

and according to the shoefax,

I only got two people

wearing these shoes prior.

You realize you're

the adult here, right?

When you gonna start

acting like one?

Del, quit trying to get

my staff pregnant

and fix the damn air

conditioner!

Ain't nobody trying

to get her pregnant, ma.

- Mind your business.

- Just 'cause you f***in' it up

don't mean you ain't tryin'.

Del, look at that thing.

It's gonna fall

and kill somebody.

You were gonna call

the repairman.

- That's your fault, mama.

- Oh, a rep-

you know what?

I'm trippin'.

Let me dip into

this discretionary fund

so I can pay for that sh*t.

You cannot give your own son

the middle finger.

Why not? I've already

tried the first two.

One, del,

get yourself out of bed

and go to school

before you flunk out.

Two, I'm not

gonna tell you again,

stop smoking weed

and playing video games.

No results,

so I'm gonna try three

and see what happens.

When the phone

get turned back on?

Dre's gym.

This is del speaking.

You have

a call from fulsom prison.

This call is timed

and monitored.

Yo, yo, yo, del!

It's your pops.

What you calling

here for, dad?

Did you not just say

"this is dre's gym"?

Who the f*** you think dre is?

It's me, nigga! It's me!

I can call

whenever the f*** I please!

Now, look, I know you

struggling and everything,

but, listen,

i might have a way to help you.

We've been getting along

just fine my whole life

- without your help.

- Look, I know, son-

you have one more minute.

F***ing jail robot.

I ain't got time to be polite.

I know you are mad at me,

but listen,

I care about you,

and I care about your mama,

and I highly suggest if you

wanna keep that place open,

you get your skinny ass

down here and see me

before it's motherfuckin'

too late.

My boy!

You done came to see

your old man, huh?

Look, dad,

this is business, all right?

Let's not pretend

it's anything else.

You said you could help me.

I'm here to find out how.

You know what?

You smart. Just like me.

I'm nothing like you.

Okay, now look, look, look.

Now, I know i

wasn't in your life.

All right? But I wanna

make it up to you.

Okay? I wanna

make it up to you.

- Ba-dow.

- That's a pretty small box

to contain

my entire childhood, dad.

It's a gift

from my motherfuckin' heart.

What is this?

That's a Mr. potato head.

- A what?

- Look at that.

I knew you was gonna

love that. Look at that.

You got the little eyes

right here,

then you got

the little nose.

Got a little comb

for the mustache.

This is some smart sh*t.

This is gonna teach you

some sh*t.

And he also got that,

just in case I got to lay

a couple motherfuckers down

up in here.

Look, dad, I'm an adult now.

Oh, so you too old to learn?

So I guess you

too old to learn

how to solve your little

bank problem, huh?

Look, what I meant to say

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