Where's the Money Page #8

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Never!

Are you crazy?!

I got a mind to teach

your ass a lesson.

No, no lesson-

let's just teach-

ooh, don't touch my gun.

Don't ever touch my gun.

Okay, not touching the gun.

Just touching your finger.

Touching a gun's

like touching a man's dick.

- Don't touch my gun.

- He said it's his dick!

- I'm not touching the gun.

- You're touching the gun.

- Agh!

- He shot him!

I told you don't touch

the gun, man!

You kill us,

you not gonna get no money.

So let me go back to the house,

and let me get the money.

24 hours, that's all I need.

24 hours.

How do I know you ain't

gonna just gonna f*** up?

There goes my sandal game!

Do I look

like I'm gonna f*** up?

Ah, man, he ain't gonna f*** up.

He ain't gonna f*** up.

Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh.

You know what?

I believe you.

- Okay, whoa.

- You know what?

For the first time,

you actually look like

your father's son.

I'm proud of you.

All right.

All right, motherfuckers!

24 hours for your ass!

And then I'm gonna come,

snatch up your mama,

and ride her sweet ass

outta here.

Come on with

the mama stuff, man.

You all right?

I would be better

if I wasn't shot!

Juice, come on, man,

50 cent got shot nine times.

You got shot in your pinky toe,

acting like a b*tch.

Sh*t hurt, okay?!

It's just a graze, come on.

About to lose a leg!

You're fine.

What's the play?

I don't know a play, okay?

You heard what he said.

If I don't have the money,

he's gonna come back,

he's gonna shoot us,

he's gonna go to the frat house

and kill everybody there,

what am I supposed to do?

I need some anesthesia.

You know what,

matter of fact,

shoot me in the head

like a horse, put me down.

Wait, wait, wait,

yeah, yeah, that's it.

- No, no!

- No, no, no, not put him down.

Put him to sleep.

Can you get roofies?

What? You know what?

I'm insulted right now.

That you would think

that I'm the roofie guy.

Next time I need roofies,

I'll present it

in a more diplomatic way,

but for now,

can you get me roofies,

yes or no?

Yeah, of course.

Gentlemen, welcome to your

final night of pledge-ship.

I know this ain't been

an easy time for y'all.

Been especially hard

on some of you.

And we had to make it

hard on you

because what you're about

to step into is so great.

Brotherhood.

Built on loyalty...

Honesty... trust.

And booze and p*ssy.

I love these guys, man.

And now,

in the grand tradition

of our esteemed forefathers

who preceded us,

we will seal

the bond of brotherhood

through the drinking

of the ceremonial punch

consisting of grain alcohol,

store-brand fruit punch,

and a little bit

of liquid thc.

Who wants to step up?

To loyalty...

Trust...

And honesty.

With that, we'd like

to welcome you former shitbags

as our brothers.

Kappa Alpha chi for life!

I think we might have

gone heavy

on the t... h...

C.

I think I'm good.

This escalator's broken.

That punch was strong.

Okay, um...

Work. Work.

Gotta get to work.

I don't know why.

I don't know why.

I don't know why.

I don't know why we-

we doing this.

Wait...

He's here's somewhere.

Ahh.

Sarah loves Russell.

Who the f*** is Russell!

Money, listen,

I just wanna talk to you.

What are you doing

down here, pledge?

- Don't you know who I am?

- Who the f*** are you?

You dumb son of a b*tch.

I'm you, motherf***er.

Nigga, you me?

Go on now, hit that sh*t.

We in this together, huh?

Goddamn.

It's in the wall.

I'm looking in the wall!

You're right, Brock.

D*cks are funny.

Whoa, whoa, what are you

doing, del? Get back to work.

Hello? Where are you?

I will find you, money,

and I will spend you.

You son of a b*tch.

Come on.

I got the money!

I got the money!

Hey, hey, hey, hey!

I got the money!

I got the-

no, I got the money,

motherf***er!

Where is he?

- He should've been back here by now.

- I don't know.

I can't really guesstimate

how long it takes

to knock out a room

full of white boys,

snatch a million dollars,

and drive all the way

to this neighborhood

in Thursday traffic.

Evening, dummies.

Here's the traitor.

What the f*** did you do,

buttersworth?!

I didn't do nothing!

I was knocked out!

We got roofied.

Everyone else is still out.

While we were out,

someone jacked all our sh*t!

Took our weed,

our cash, everything!

You doubted me about this,

then look what happened!

- I knew you were up to something!

- I wasn't up to nothing.

You guys always talking

about brotherhood,

having each other's back

through thick and thin.

Something crazy happens,

this how y'all act?

Come on.

You're not my brother.

You're a f***ing thief.

I'm not a thief.

I would never steal

y'all's sh*t.

But I think I know who did.

So what I'll do

is I'll go get it for y'all.

And I'll come right back,

'cause where I'm from,

that's what brothers do,

we have each other's back.

So just ease up.

Hey.

You're not going anywhere.

At least not by yourself.

A kappa Alpha chi brother

never stands alone,

so if you're going,

we're going.

Come on!

Well, that's great.

That's real cute.

I think I'm gonna handle

this one on my own.

You guys just chill here,

all right?

I don't think so,

buttersworth.

You don't have to do

anything on your own anymore.

You're kappa Alpha chi now.

You guys don't understand.

This guy is real.

Y'all just stay here and chill.

I got this.

Not a chance.

These guys are right.

We got your back.

We're family now, right?

Kappa Alpha chi for life.

All right.

Kappa Alpha chi for life.

You know there's, like,

a bunch of d*cks on your face?

- Like a bunch.

- Yeah, there's a lot of 'em.

98...

Ooh...

Now, now, Berta.

I got a lot of money here.

I can make you happy.

I'll get you anything

you want.

We'll make a life together.

I don't want

your dirty money, Leon.

I'm fine with my life

just as it is.

We just got the phone back on.

Thinking about a second line.

Where's my son?

Woman, how am I gonna focus

on getting up in that p*ssy

when all you can talk about

is what came out of it?

I think I can get us

out of here.

Go ahead, you got that?

Oh, you got soft hands.

I never noticed.

You shut up.

You shut up.

You shut up.

You shut the f*** up.

You guys hang out by the back

door and wait for the signal.

Okay, yeah, totally.

Yeah, what's

the signal, though?

Bro, I told you,

it's "man. "

- Man. Man.

- Man. Man.

- Like- like, "man!"

- Man. Man.

Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes.

F*** you, Berta!

You just missed out on the

greatest dick you ever known!

Um, black Mr. clean!

I heard 'roids

make your dick small!

What the f***

did you just say to me?

you and this b*tch

are just lucky to be alive!

Oh, you gonna be sorry

you said that.

We- we- we cool.

It's cool.

I'm sorry.

I apologize.

Get your ass back!

Motherfuckers

have tried and died

sneaking up on Leon goodlow!

You make out

anything he's saying?

Sounds like when a chick's

telling you about her childhood

while she's eating out

your a**hole.

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