You're Telling Me! Page #2

in an entirely | different light.

You all right, boy? | Yeah.

Glad you weren't hurt.

That's a puncture-proof tire.

Couldn't hurt that tire.

Knock the tree down first.

I still think Robert's | far too young to marry,

and I was afraid some cheap | girl of vulgar family...

You understand.

Delicious, delicious!

Robert tells me your husband | is a businessman.

Yes, in a manner of speaking.

However, his greatest | interest is in his inventions.

May I ask, | what does he invent?

Oh, various things.

For instance, he's been | working, lately, on a tire.

A tire? | An automobile tire?

That's been | invented already.

An automobile tire | that cannot be punctured.

Oh, but that's | impossible surely.

I've never heard | of any such tire.

And if there'd been a demand | for a puncture-proof tire,

surely someone would've | invented one before this.

They've been trying to | for 20 years, and here she is.

Mrs. Murchison, | this is my husband.

Your husband?

Well, this is a pleasant surprise. | I want to show you this tire.

Look at the resiliency in that | thing. I think I'd better be going.

Samuel,

won't you please take | your invention out of here?

All right.

I take it Mr. Bisbee | did not come from Virginia.

No.

So Abigail's been telling you | her family history, eh?

Well, | you ain't seen a thing.

Wait till I show you | the Bisbee clan.

We were all Union men.

Sam, I don't think Mrs. Murchison | would be interested in those pictures.

Oh, sure she would. | Real down-to-earth people.

Speak our language.

Now, there's Uncle Bean. | Bean Bisbee, the tiger.

Fight at the drop of a hat,

and yet underneath it all as | tenderhearted as a baby lamb.

Look at those eyes...

Wrong picture. | That was Uncle Jim.

He was the black sheep of the | family, until he got into politics.

Now he's got a big home | up at Passamaquoddy.

And that's Aunt Minnie,

an angel of mercy if ever | there was one, and there was.

Known from California | to Maine and back again.

Stay up all night | taking care of the boys,

night after night.

I really must be going now.

Wait a minute. I want to show | you my private art collection.

Okay, Abigail?

Oh!

Not bad, eh?

Get the knee action?

And stands without hitching!

Another relative, I presume.

No, no, no.

Just a little girl I met down | in the New Hebrides Islands.

Hello. | Hello.

What's the news | from the front?

All quiet, up to now.

Shall we take a chance? | Now or never!

Your naive gaucherie is amazing. Huh?

I said | your naive gaucherie.

Oh, yes.

Thanks, thanks very much. | Nice of you to mention that.

So this is the family | my son wants to marry into.

Yes, it is. | I really can't believe it.

The whole affair will be | definitely broken up at once.

We shall | disinherit Robert

sooner than consent | to a marriage as...

As impossible | as this one is!

Why, I'll crack her | in the eye.

Come, Robert. | Just a moment, Mother.

I don't know what's happened, but | I'm sure my mother doesn't mean...

Your mother means everything | she has said and more!

But, Mother, you can't talk | to Pauline's family like that.

What's happened?

Tell me. What is it? Your father.

Everything was lovely, | then he came in.

Me? What'd I do? | Never mind, Dad.

They don't understand you. | That's all.

I meant | every word I said.

I'm ashamed that | my son should...

You've said quite enough. | Now, please go.

Bob, take your mother out | of here and don't come back.

Pauline, | I can explain everything.

Say, who started all this?

Come, Robert. | Have you no pride left?

Don't you even know when | you've been ordered out?

Pauline. | Goodbye.

You better go, son. You've | caused enough trouble around here.

Well, I guess I told him.

Yes, you certainly | fixed that up.

You've got nothing | to worry about.

I got a letter from the National | Tire Company right here in my pocket.

Well, | isn't that just dandy.

Now, I suppose I can marry | a balloon tire.

Well, I've been married | to one for 20 years,

and a flat one at that!

Now, you two, | listen to this letter.

"Mr. Samuel Bisbee...

"Dear sir.

"Your letter, at hand, regarding | the Bisbee Puncture-Proof Tire.

"If you care to | demonstrate your... "

Mr. Samuel Bisbee.

Mr. Bisbee? I'm Mr. Robbins, | the president of the company.

Pardon my glove. Glad | to know you, Mr. Robbins.

Gentlemen, Mr. Bisbee. | How do you do?

Gentlemen, glad to know you.

Are you ready to | show us your invention?

I'll be with you | in half a tick.

What's the idea | of the arsenal?

Going target shooting?

Use that for | demonstrating purposes.

Hey, what's this?

That's another | of my inventions.

I call it | the "nose lifter-upper. "

Makes breathing easy | and prevents snoring.

However, that's not for sale.

And this?

This makes scrubbing floors | a pleasure.

Put one on each foot, and | use the sponge as a polo ball.

What's this?

Twins.

That's not for sale | just at present.

I thought we came here | to see a puncture-proof tire.

Yes. Did you bring a tire with you?

I have four tires | on my car, downstairs.

If you'll follow me,

I'll give you | a demonstration

of a 1000% | puncture-proof tire,

the Bisbee | Puncture-Proof Tire.

All right, gentlemen, | let's go.

I don't like his looks. | He acts like a maniac.

He's harmless. | Yes?

Oh, pardon me. | Okay.

Help me push this heap down the line.

Looks just like | an ordinary tire to me.

Give him a chance.

All right, thank you, gentlemen. | Will you please stand back?

These bullets bounce.

I'm going to show you a real | 1000% puncture-proof tire.

That's funny.

I'll try the other one.

I told you he was just | another fool inventor.

I guess you're right.

You think so, eh?

Well, I tell you, I haven't | crossed on those front tires,

but I put | the rear tires on myself.

I'm going to prove...

Watch this.

Now, this'll be | a different story.

They're a huge success!

A perfect case of deflation!

Calling all cars.

Maniac shooting up cars on | Main Street. That is all.

Hey, what are you doing there? Hey!

Where you going? Where | I usually go on Sundays.

Church? | Yes.

I thought I might go | to church, myself, today.

Mother's going with me.

You know why I'm here.

I can't stay away from you.

I called you | all day yesterday.

I know. | I wanted to answer.

Oh, Bob, it's no use.

I've thought it all out.

I'll come by for you tonight, and | we'll drive to Stanton and get married.

I have more pride than | to marry into a family that...

That thinks | they're too good for me.

Mother didn't mean that.

She was just annoyed | with your dad.

Well, Dad suits me.

I think he has just as good | manners as your mother has.

Don't go.

Your dad's all right.

You bet he is!

And when he gets back from putting | that big deal over in the city,

why, we'll have | as much money as you have.

You wait and see.

Are you two children | quarreling?

Good morning, Mrs. Bisbee. | Good morning, Mr. Murchison.

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