*batteries not included Page #3

- Hector. He's a musician,

so he travels around a lot,

different places.

So, what about you?

No more girlfriend?

No, she got smart.

Don't say that.

She'll be back.

- Yeah? Why should she?

- Because.

You're an artist.

Oh, God, an artist.

- Can I come in?

- No.

I make a very artistic

cup of coffee.

No, um...

I want to go to bed-

to sleep.

I have to take a nap.

Did I say something wrong?

No, it was nice

talking to you.

I'll see you tomorrow, OK?

OK.

Tomorrow.

Mason?

Maybe it was for you.

What?

Maybe they're here,

those things,

because of you.

Give me back

my camera, man.

Unexplained phenomena, man.

Bust it up, Benny!

Want to do business?

Severance pay.

Wanna see

a strange object?

There you go, fool!

Frank!

Frank!

Aah!

What's happening?

Tonight's the night.

- Already?

- Uh-huh.

The fuses!

She blew the fuses.

There it is!

Ooh!

How's she doing?

It happened.

I'm a grandmother.

It's twins!

This calls for cigars.

- You got any cigars?

- Cigars?

This is history!

D- Do you realize

what's going on here?

Machines

that reproduce themselves!

Spare parts

with intelligence!

Living hardware!

I- I don't know

how you got here,

or why you picked us,

but... we pledge allegiance

to honor and protect you...

in sickness and in health...

in rain and sleet...

in the best of times

and the worst of times...

and, w-we...

so help us, God!

Shh!

What's that?

Batteries not included.

The Lord is my shepherd,

I shall not want.

He leadeth me

beside the still waters.

Faye...

Faye, this has gone far enough.

Come on. Get up.

Got to accept it, Frank.

It's over.

Poor little soul.

What soul? What soul?

Mrs. Riley, Mrs. Riley-

Mrs. Riley,

it's a chunk of metal.

It's nine ounces of canned goods,

most of it from your apartment.

Now we can

really look inside-

Wait a minute.

Last night you were so excited.

Now they're chunks of metal?

You don't bury the most advanced,

self-perpetuating,

machine-tooled,

flying clockwork known to man!

Mrs. Riley, please!

You know, that little tiny,

helpless spare part-

It got born,

and it never had a chance.

It could happen to anyone.

What's the matter with you?

What did I say?

Marisa.

Marisa, wait a minute!

Hey! Whatcha doing?

Marisa, wait a minute!

Wait up!

Would you stop?

- Wait a minute!

- I'm worried about the baby, OK?

I can't help it, but don't let it

bother you. It's not your problem.

Harry?

Where are you going?

Stop him!

Oh, God, what is it?

Harry, wait a minute!

Harry!

Harry, please!

Ahh!

Champ, what are you doing?

Come on, open up.

Let's talk about this.

You don't have to say anything.

I'll do all the talking.

What are you gonna do with that?

Gary, Glen.

Uh, smells good, Pop.

You back in business?

What's it look like?

Ham san, Miracle Whip,

Canadian on the side.

Steak medium rare!

Two over easy, English,

no toast, and hold the spuds.

Burger up.

Boy, I'm sure going to hate

to crunch this place up.

Oh, thank you, ma'am.

What's this,

April fool?

He's working on it.

It's his first day, OK?

Hey, pal...

like this.

Remember?

Burger up.

Now, that's more like it.

Look at this!

Lefty, hey!

Give me that ketchup.

- This one?

- No, the other one.

Oh, yeah, here you go.

Thanks.

What?

What do you mean, "what"?

Hey, Frank.

Guess what I did.

- What now?

- I named the little guys.

Flotsam and Jetsam!

Isn't that cute?

Yeah, cute.

Be nice, Papa.

I'm always nice.

I've got a kitchen to run.

If you're not nice,

you'll drive them away.

Meaning what?

I like being a family again.

Just you and me

and Flotsam and Jetsam

and... and Bobby.

OK, Faye.

OK.

- Oh.

- Carlos.

Is this what

you're talking about?

It's full of junk.

It's a storage shed, you idiot.

No, it's not.

It's full of ghosts

or spirits or something.

They're just trying

to make me look bad.

You don't need ghosts

for that, Carlos.

Your time's running out,

my friend.

Hey, I'm hungry. How about

a little service around here.

What's great about a place

you can't even get a menu?

You want a menu, pal?

What for? You're gonna get

the special of the day.

Man, you shouldn't even be in here.

I'm gonna report all you guys.

Bobby, have you had

your lunch?

Wait a minute.

Excuse me.

There.

Now, what about you?

You want to sleep over?

Why don't you call your mommy

and tell her where you'll be.

No thanks, Mrs. Riley.

I can't tonight.

Bobby, you want

to go out and play?

You ain't going nowhere

unless you eat something.

You look terrible.

Thin. Here.

- Come on, lady. You gotta stop this.

- Eat, for the love of Mike.

You're just like your father.

I don't know nothing about my father,

and I don't wanna know.

Don't say that. He loves you.

Lady, I'm not

who you think I am.

Of course you are,

my little munchkin.

I'm learning how Lacey works,

how this city works.

- It's my way out of here.

- Where are you going?

Anywhere.

I'm smart, I'm talented.

- I get ideas all the time.

- Of course you do.

Why don't you talk to your father

tonight at dinner?

I'll cook a ham.

You're inviting me

for dinner?

You'd love my ham.

Oh, my goodness,

is that a smile?

I think I just saw a smile.

Oh, not here, honey.

Back inside on the counter.

What the hell is that?

It's them. The little guys.

My little munchkins.

Stay away from me.

You're not fooling anybody.

Crazy, my ass.

Marisa, open up.

Hi.

Listen, you are going

to stop worrying

about that baby.

Step aside.

Whole wheat bread.

Lots of milk.

We've got whole milk,

half fat, non-fat.

One baby book.

What are you doing?

You don't have to take care of me.

I got you these

for that special yen.

Mm-mmm.

Oh. Oh.

You made me

an art collector.

He's, uh, a new guy,

very talented.

What's this one

say to you?

That's my favorite.

It's, um, it's a guy

standing in the sun.

- Sun? What sun? There's no sun.

- Oh, yes, there is.

See, all you see now

is the shadows.

See, if he moves

two steps in any direction,

he'll be in the sunlight.

I've been looking at it a lot,

you know, because it's art.

You got to keep

looking at it.

What?

What are you staring at?

He's on his way.

- Carlos?

- Yo, Mr. Kovacs.

Carlos, what are you

doing here?

I want one more chance.

I got to have this job,

you understand?

You've been happy

up till now, right?

Mr. Lacey.

This is, uh...

I know who he is.

Mr. Lacey.

I gave them the money.

And they sent it

right back.

Come here.

I got a commitment to have

this entire block down to grade level.

Grade level. Comprende?

I can do it, sir.

There's no problem,

I assure you.

In three days, permits expire

and legal options go out the window.

- I know about options, lot assemblies-

- Interest rates are going back up,

and I'm paying a demolition crew

to sit around in a restaurant

they're supposed to be knocking down.

Tonight.

I'll have them out by tonight.

You've had your chance, kid.

I've made other arrangements.

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