28 Days Page #6

Lily, wait for me.

Beat you.

What are you doing?

Great. Another thing l suck at.

Well, hold on. Gwen, hey.

Please.

Come here a second.

-What?

-What were you thinking about?

When you threw the ball,

what were you thinking about?

l don't know. The mating habits

of African ants. l don't know.

The striped thing.

You were thinking about

hitting the mattress.

Well, you know, it might sound funny

to you, but that's all wrong.

When you lock in on the strike zone...

...it's looking about

the size of a peanut.

And you think, ''Damn. l gotta get

that little ball in there?''

You've psyched yourself

right out of the game.

The strike zone, the call...

...the count, the batter,

forget all that.

You gotta think about the little

things. The things you can control.

You can control your stance,

your balance...

...your release, your follow-through.

Think about those little things

and only those little things....

You know? l mean....

Because when you let go of the ball...

...it's over.

You don't have a say in what happens.

That's somebody else's job.

-l want you to try this.

-l don't want to.

l'm just curious.

-l don't want to do it.

-l just want to see how you hold it.

Don't grab it, don't grab it.

Look at it, look at it.

Hold it like an egg.

Loose. Easy. All right?

Let me get a look at it

from over there.

Let me get a look at it

from over there.

All right.

l want you to throw it over here

nice and easy.

Point at me with your left hand.

Throw it where you're pointing at.

Better. But you nutted the batter...

...and the other team's beating

the crap out of you.

Try again. Heads up.

l want you to do it again.

This time, shut your eyes.

-What?

-Just shut your eyes.

-So weird.

-Fire away.

Right there.

That is a strike in any country.

You're a natural.

Come on.

Folks, the definition of insanity...

...is repeating the same behavior over

and over, expecting different results.

Thank you.

l have a question.

Once we all leave, we have needs

that are going to need to be filled...

...by people, physically, at times.

How and when can we do that?

Not how, just when?

Yeah, l know, l know.

People in recovery want to know

when's a good time to start dating.

And my rule of thumb is, when you

get home, get yourself a plant.

l like spider plants,

but whatever turns you on.

Then, in about a year, get a pet.

And then, if, in say...

...two years, the plant

and the pet are still alive...

...then you can start to think about

having a relationship.

Thanks.

l'll be fine. l know what to do.

Don't drink, go to meetings,

find a sponsor, ask for help.

Don't drink, go to meetings,

find a sponsor, ask for help.

Happy traiIs to you

Keep smiIing untiI then

Who cares about the cIouds

If we're together

Just sing a song

And bring the sunny....

Well, l hope he makes it.

Statistically,

only three out of 1 0 of us will.

So in a way...

...it's good for us if he goes back

to using. You know?

Odds-wise.

God, l love afternoons like this.

Do you know what's missing?

That l don't have a dry vodka martini

with two olives in a chilled glass.

God, l miss that.

Lately l've been

lying awake at night...

...thinking of the dumb-ass things

l've done when l was messed up.

One night last year, at dinner,

l threw up all over my glazed ham.

Then l thought,

''Well, maybe nobody noticed.''

l don't think of it as a garnish.

l'm a winner.

Oh, God.

You know what the worst one was?

For me?

My best friend in the whole world.

We grew up playing ball,

hunting and fishing.

One Sunday morning, he walks in

on me and his wife in bed.

You never live that one down.

Tell me one of yours.

Excuse me?

What's the worst thing you did

when you were messed up?

l don't know.

Come on. Give me a couple.

l'll pick one.

l don't really remember any.

l just told you some stuff that's....

l'm a drunk.

Drunks forget everything. You know?

Come on.

Why? So l can recount the last 1 5

disgusting years to humiliate myself?

-No, thanks.

-Why not?

Because l don't feel like

talking about it.

You too good for me?

Are you dense?

Did your mom drop you on your head?

l said no. l don't want to

talk about it. Just drop it.

God, it's so hard.

You're a doctor.

That's the way it's supposed to be.

We carry our own bags here.

This isn't the Sheraton.

Your chores are posted.

We will take the stairs.

What? l paid you a shitload of money.

l am not doing any chores.

-Pills.

-Booze.

Coke and sex.

It's your daughter, Darian, Deirdre.

Don't worry about Darian.

I tucked her into bed hours ago.

So did I.

No.

Oh, God!

lt was an unbelievable episode.

l wish you'd seen it.

Everyone was losing their minds.

What are you doing?

Packing.

What does it look like?

-You're not leaving for a couple days.

-So?

l am leaving.

Might as well get ready.

There's no point in

making this room all homey...

...for only, like, 42 more hours.

There's 20 minutes left till curfew.

Let's get ice cream.

-Satisfy your sugar cravings.

-No, thanks.

You don't have to do this.

Do what?

How do you know what l have to do?

Have you ever left rehab?

No, but l--

You've never left rehab, so you

don't know what you're talking about.

True, but l have been a part

of some very emotional sing-outs--

l'm sorry. That's right.

You sang ''Lean On Me'' a few times.

The stupidest cheesy song ever.

You must know about leaving rehab

better than anyone.

l got an eyelash. Make a wish.

Custody of my kids.

Sobriety.

Come on, baby. We all want that.

Think of something else.

My foreskin back.

No one asked me before they took it.

They just took it.

Way to share, Gerhardt.

Way to share.

Okay, here we go.

All gone.

Read the sign.

Betty, where's the love?

Daniel, wow.

Guzzling Gwen.

What happened?

This? l honest to God don't know.

Well, it's really nice to see you.

Get a room.

Oh, my God, it's a joke!

lt's a miracle! Oh, you know what?

l could use your medical expertise,

if you got a second.

l got a second.

-Use a condom.

-Ah, two! Two in one day!

Gerhardt?

l wrote this for Andrea's going away,

and that is for you.

-Am l the lead?

-Yes.

lf you could do that,

that would be great.

l should direct this.

-You don't want me.

-You'll be great.

Gwen, l'll ruin it.

You get to wear lipstick.

Really?

So just think Meryl Streep.

Think Cry in the Dark. Remember?

''Dingo stole my baby.

A dingo stole my baby.''

Andrea D., mail pickup

at the Parker cabin, main room.

Okay, go. Go, go.

-Gerhardt, come on!

-All right. Okay.

Watch the phone.

Somebody sent you

a cute little monkey.

We used to make those here.

They're real easy.

You take a string,

tie it around the toes.

Becomes the head.

And arms--

Come here.

Sit down.

Hello, everybody. My name's Gwen.

l'm an alcoholic and an addict.

But l guess you already know that.

ln honor of Andrea's departure...

...instead of singing

''Lean On Me'' yet again...

...we have our own version

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