28 Hotel Rooms Page #2

and then I look up and see an ugly

woman, I might be extremely turned on.

Oh, oh, oh.

What? No, it's gonna...

You... It's good, it's

good, it's good. What?

You don't like that?

No, it's good.

This nail is so small that it's...

It looks so sad, this nail.

But you have to... Don't you

feel for the underdog a little?

I do. Like, "poor little guy"?

It's odd that you have...

you have no nail there.

It's kind of...

it's kind of freakish.

It's gettin' kinda scary.

Shut up and paint it.

Is it that you... Did you

dance when you were a kid?

Yeah.

You did?

Mm-hmm.

Like ballet?

Mm-hmm.

Really?

Did you do modern dance? Mm-hmm.

Jazz?

Mm-hmm.

Did you ever break-dance?

Mm-mmm.

Barefoot Polynesian hula?

Mm-hmm.

- I'm so bad at this.

- Mm-hmm.

What do you even like

about me?

Could you tell me?

Yeah, sure.

Okay.

Do it.

You want me to...

You want me to tell you

what I like about you?

Yeah.

Um...

What do you mean? List.

Like-Like make the list.

Like a top ten list? Yeah.

That's impossible to do.

I can't sum it all up.

It's not impossible.

Um, I think you're

a very smart woman,

which isn't saying much

compared to me.

But it's good. Very good.

Um...

You're beautiful. That

goes without saying. Sexy.

I love your eyes.

Great eyes. Um... I

love your moles.

Um...

Your...

The way you-you walk.

Look good doing it.

Um...

I feel...

really ugly.

Just... a horrible person.

But then...

I like you.

I go to sleep.

When... When I wake up, I...

I can't concentrate at work

I can't...

I love him.

I love him.

I think.

I don't know what to think.

Yeah.

I know.

I know.

What do you like

about me?

Something. Good.

See? It's hard.

It's not easy.

I like your laugh.

I like when you cry too. But I... I don't like

when you're sad, but I like when you cry.

There something...

How about both at once?

When you laugh and cry?

You like that?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I love that.

You do it... And when you laugh

your nostrils kind of flare.

They're-They're almost, like,

breathing. Right now.

It... It's beautiful.

That might be my number one.

Oh, God.

Bye.

Bye.

Don't go.

Yeah, let's live here.

Take another flight. I can't. He's picking

me up from the airport. I gotta go.

Bye.

Bye.

I love you.

Now would be a good time to express

your feelings, reciprocal or otherwise.

Yes.

Yes?

I love you.

That's why I'm here.

That's why I'm doing this.

What are we doing?

We're...

I don't know.

You tell me.

I don't know.

I'd like to know.

We could keep meeting.

You mean cheating.

Yeah. I suppose.

Well, let's call it what it is.

I wanna keep doing this.

I'm happy.

No, I'm happy.

Okay. Yeah, well, I'm still

working through that section.

Okay. That-That's

awesome, Lauren. Bye.

So?

So, he loved it.

I told you. He's a genius. No, he loves

everything though. That's his way.

He's very...

He's always very kind.

No, no, no... I'm telling

you, this is the one.

This is the one. It's better than the first one.

Come on. Trust me. I know.

- I hope you're right.

- I know I'm right.

And I read it.

To my second book.

Yeah.

You look beautiful.

So do you.

In a manly way.

Give me a kiss.

Give me a kiss.

Listen.

I want a kiss.

Hey. Look over there.

Hey, what's that?

It's the Empire State Building.

We're gonna climb that tonight.

We're goin' nuts tonight.

We're gonna eat.

We're gonna eat light.

We're gonna have a nice dessert.

We're gonna get drunk on wine.

And then we're gonna

f***in' dance.

Seriously. I'm giving you a f***in' New York tour.

It's starting tonight.

Starting tonight. No, I have...

I've had dinners with...

so many people from New York

at work, these offices, I...

You got recognized today. It's...

That's so rare. It never happens.

I know. And yet...

I mean, you know...

It's not safe.

I understand. I don't think you should feel paranoid.

New York's a big city.

I don't think anyone's gonna recognize you.

If they recognize you...

If they recognize it, we can be friends. We

can be friends walking around New York city.

I know. Look, I have an idea.

You're not gonna be sorry.

Just give it a chance.

Does it involve food?

- It's gonna be great.

- Better be, like, the greatest idea ever,

'cause I'm really,

really into my idea.

It's...

It's totally amazing, because the fact that

they gave me more than one team this time...

means that they see me

as somebody who, um...

It's good. It's just,

it's really, really good.

And it means I have the power to

actually do something for once.

The only problem is Aaron.

F***ing Aaron is gonna try to

f*** things up for me as usual,

'cause he's always jealous.

Now, if we merge,

then I'll end up being in a

position to run those teams too.

So... I'm cold.

I can handle him.

Now I just gotta kick ass.

Then I can pick my projects.

Only wanna answer to Charlie.

That's all I wanna do anyway.

Am I talking too much.

I'm talking too much.

No.

Are you okay?

Yeah. No, I'm fine.

Is this you stoned?

You get all paranoid and distant?

I'm fine.

I had a thing.

With her?

No.

You can tell me about her. No, it's not her.

It's just... It's nothing.

What?

My book got killed.

Like really killed.

The reviews were...

It was like I murdered

their children or something.

You know what? You just gotta move on.

It's your second book, you know.

"Move on."

Move on to what?

It's... No one's gonna

read my book now.

Well, I think it's good.

Nobody gives a sh*t.

I mean, no one cares.

You know, I wanna do something

in my life.

I wanna... I want...

You know? I want...

Come on, you're just stoned.

Come on.

I want what I do to matter.

What I do matters.

And I don't wanna

just move widgets around.

You mean, like, ensuring the continuing

growth of major corporations?

Hey, without you, who'd exploit the

people, rape the land and make billions?

That's not very funny.

Actually, it is.

I'm paid fairly

for the work I do.

What?

High school teachers barely

exist over the poverty line.

Maybe I deserve more.

Maybe...

Maybe my contribution to the health of

this nation is actually worth more.

Dollars, right?

It's all about dollars.

Yeah. Actually, it is.

You don't create anything. I mean, you

don't... You just move numbers around.

Mmm.

Right?

I create efficiency,

which creates wealth.

For what?

For money.

If you do it for the money,

then you're just a whore.

I do it just for the money.

Seriously.

Wow. Look at you,

you bourgeois pig.

Look at you,

commie bastard.

Seriously.

Seriously?

- Yeah.

- Okay. Seriously, I think that life is f***ing short.

And we're animals, and we have

to f***ing fight for our food,

and the weak die,

and the strong survive.

Wow. Who are you?

And what are you doing

in my room?

What are you doing?

What do you think I'm doing?

You're leaving?

Not everyone gets to just lay around and

have their f***ing feelings all day long.

Okay? And, you know, gets to sort of turn

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