5 Headed Shark Attack

Now, I want sexy.

Give me sexy.

I like sexy. Yes.

I love it!

Beautiful. Nice.

I like that.

I like that.

Give me some plump.

Yeah. Do it. Do it.

What about you?

What about you?

Yes.

Beautiful.

Seduce me.

Do it. Do it.

Yes. I like that.

That's hot.

-Hey there, cutie.

-Hey.

All right.

Here, everybody.

I love it!

Wait. Is that blood?

-My God.

-Bloody hell.

What is that?

My God.

Look! Over there!

Is that a shark?

-A shark?

-And a big one.

-My God. Take a picture.

-Hey!

Hey, Juan!

Juan, come here!

Juan! Juan, get here, Juan!

My God, Juan!

We have a shark!

Juan, bring your video camera!

I love it.

Juan, bring your video camera!

Come on!

My God.

-I like it like hell.

-Is there something in the water?

There it is.

There it is.

Beautiful.

Holy sh*t, it's coming!

Sh*t!

Attention San Juan Police.

We have a federal report

of a shark attack

off Palomino Island.

Please investigate.

Calling dispatch.

This is Officer Sterling.

We are approaching

Palomino Island. Standby.

Hello?

Anyone here?

There should be six people

on this boat.

Maybe they're diving.

No. I don't think so.

-Does it work?

-Let's see.

Yeah.

Wait, wait, wait, wait.

Go back. Did you see that?

Go back. That.

What the hell?

I better call

search and rescue. Now.

Six people don't

disappear just like that.

Copy.

This may have convinced me

to become a vegetarian as well.

I love vegetarians.

-They taste great.

-Bon apptit.

Here we go.

God.

Well, if the cyanide

killed fish...

When they're filled with plastic,

they eventually starve to death.

Way to go world.

I don't even want to know.

And to think,

humans produced

almost 300 million tons

of this stuff.

Too bad it's not nutritious.

That's actually

not a bad idea.

Nutritious, edible plastic.

I have that already planning.

All right, guys? That's mine.

Dr. Yost, these fine officers were

hoping to ask you a few questions.

Something about a shark.

Sure, let me just clean up.

I think she means

while we clean up.

Well, wait.

Why me?

Come on, I'll help.

Thanks.

So, to what do I owe

the pleasure, officers?

They're here investigating the

missing people on that yacht.

Okay. I'm not sure that I

can help, but go for it.

We believe this was

a shark attack.

Do you know how many

shark attacks

there have been

in Puerto Rico? Eleven.

And no one's died

of a shark attack since 1924.

I find it highly unlikely.

-Sharks are dwindling in

oceans everywhere. -Yeah.

Yeah. We know. They're not

here for a lecture, Dr. Yost.

I was hoping that maybe

you can help me with this.

I found this camera

on the boat.

The people disappeared.

We believe this is

a great white.

Give me a break. Great whites

don't just kill people on boats.

What's next, they fly

through tornadoes?

That's odd.

Can a shark like this exist?

We've had multiple sightings

of some sort of...

I think when Captain Sterling

is trying to ask is,

Is it possible for shark

to have more than one head?

Or is this just

a shark frenzy?

Most likely the ladder.

There have been reports

of sharks with multiple heads.

I've heard of two

and even three-headed sharks,

but shark attacks

are very rare here,

so I wouldn't expect

another one.

Did you say

multiple sightings?

Yeah. We've received

a few calls.

-This is a joke.

-Actually...

it's not at all impossible.

Let me look. Okay.

There have been hundreds

if not thousands of instances

of animals with more

than one head.

Here's an actual

two-headed shark,

but it only lived

a few hours.

Also in mythology,

take for example, Cerberus.

-Cerberus? -Cerberus was the

gigantic, two-headed hound of Hades,

who guarded the gates

of the underworld

and prevented the escape

of the shades of the dead.

-I mean, it could be... -This

is just ridiculous. Laughable.

I mean, a species like this couldn't

even exist with multiple heads.

As far as I can tell, these are

digital distortions on the image.

Or should we call them myths?

Or simply Photoshop.

-Yeah. But right...

-No. No buts.

This is just not possible.

Correct, doctor?

I have to agree,

it's very unlikely.

Well. Anyway.

Thank you for your time.

Thank you.

-Appreciate it.

-Good luck.

-Thank you.

-Yeah.

Hey, Dr. Yo.

How's it looking out here?

Why are we going out again?

The aquarium's future,

my future.

Our futures.

What's he talking about,

Dr. Yo?

She didn't tell you.

Tell us what?

We're going to catch

the shark everyone's hunting.

-That's right.

-What?

-Here she goes. Watch this.

-Shut up, Ram.

Is this for real?

We're supposed

to catch a shark? Seriously?

Dr. Yo?

I'm so sorry. My hands are tied.

I was going to tell you guys.

We can't actually do that,

can we?

-Technically, n...

-Technically,

it falls under the purview

of "Don't ask, don't tell."

And we're all okay

with that, right?

Because if you're not, you can

say good-bye to this job,

this opportunity,

and your futures.

You could gone about this

a different way.

You didn't have to put out

a press release.

What way would that

have been?

The right way.

Dr. Yo, I'm not here to mince

words, okay? We need a shark.

And what better than the

killer great white shark?

And we need it now.

It's no secret that aquarium

is suffering, and the only way

we're going to stay afloat is

if we can get a big exhibit.

Otherwise, we're done.

It's that simple.

Get the kids what they want.

Something different, right? A shark!

I mean, anyone can get a snorkel

and a pair of fins and see

80% of the species

we got in that aquarium.

But a shark...

that sells tickets.

Besides, it's conservation.

We can study it. We can rid

the ocean of this danger.

If we don't do it, there

will be droves of poachers

killing dozens of sharks.

I mean, that'd be horrible.

So, everyone, you're

either in or you're out.

And if you're out, I'd ask you

to step off the boat now.

Okay, good.

Let's head out.

Bait's all set. Cameras,

batteries, bait. All set.

I'll check the feed

on the GoPro.

-Linds, you good on your monitor?

-Yeah.

I don't like this.

I don't even think it's legal.

Yeah, me neither.

-Anything?

-Nothing.

Not even a guppy.

-You have anything, Linds?

-No.

But that could be

a good thing.

Sharks, they tend to scare other

animals when they're around.

But there's, like,

nothing here.

Yeah, she's right.

I don't see anything.

I mean, no fish,

no crustaceans,

not even at a snail.

Not that surprised,

word is the coral is dying

because of the cyanide

being used by the fishermen

for the fish

for aquarium trade.

Aren't we kind of complicit

in that now?

Hey son, throw it in

like you got a pair. Okay?

Wish we had

a little dog or something.

You know, that's really get

the beast belly rolling.

Are you serious?

That's messed up.

-I was just kidding.

-Are you?

Hey, guys,

I think I see something.

Right there.

-There, there. -Yeah, there's

definitely something there.

What is it?

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