A Farewell to Arms Page #8

Unless you're crazy.

Not as crazy as you think. I'm not

going to let you off the hook, ever.

I won't startle the whole countryside

now, letting them know I'm not married.

We could go to some other village.

Wherever we went, it would be too

embarrassing. I show too plainly.

I can't be married

in this splendid matronly shape.

You'd make a beautiful bride

in any shape.

We'll get married as soon as

I'm thin again.

Everyone will say,

"What a handsome couple."

We'll have orange blossoms, organ

music, and somebody to mind the baby.

Come in.

How nice, Mrs. Zimmerman.

I got to tell you a joke.

When my son told me you were

coming, he made a mistake.

He thought you were cousins.

Here's beer and breakfast

for the gentleman...

...and hot wine and spices for madam.

- Thank you.

- Happy evening, lady and gentleman.

- Happy evening, Mrs. Zimmerman.

- Happy evening, Mrs. Zimmerman.

- I think I may marry Mrs. Zimmerman.

- She's too good for you.

- Here, drink this while it's hot.

Darling, I'm going to cut

my hair short. Very short.

- Now?

- No. When I'm thin again.

I'll be thin and I'll have short hair.

- You're not going to say no, are you?

- You can cut it.

- Why? I thought you liked my hair long.

- I love it long.

- You said you prefer it short.

- I did not.

- You hinted it.

- I didn't. I'm just trying to agree.

I wish you wouldn't try to confuse me.

I know why you're bored with me.

- Because I love you too much.

- You're mad.

- Please don't shout at me.

- I'm just trying to say, you don't bore me.

Everything else bores me but you.

Darling, you mustn't mind me.

We really are the same.

We mustn't misunderstand on purpose.

- We won't.

- But people do.

They love each other,

and misunderstand on purpose.

They fight, then suddenly

they aren't the same.

- We won't fight.

- We mustn't.

Because there's only us two.

In the world,

there's all the rest of them.

Anything comes between us,

we're gone. They have us.

They won't get us...

...because you're too brave.

Nothing ever happens to the brave.

They die, of course.

A coward dies a thousand deaths,

the brave but once.

The brave die thousands of times,

if they're intelligent.

You're an authority. You're brave.

No, I'm not.

But anyway...

...I won't cut my hair until after

Catherine is born, and I'm thin.

I'll cut it off and be a fine new girl

for you. And you'll fall in love again.

I love you enough now.

What are you

trying to do, ruin me?

- Yes. I want to ruin you.

- Good, that's what I want too.

Say, you know how they go courting

in the Alps? They yodel.

If the lady's interested, she yodels back.

Really?

That's it. Checkmate.

I don't care, I've got your queen.

Darling, the game's over. It's checkmate.

But why? I still have more of these

silly pieces than you have.

I wish you liked rummy.

It's much more fun.

Happy New Year, darling.

To all three of us.

- Here's to 1918.

- Little Catherine's year.

Do you mind? Our being alone, just us,

on New Year's Eve?

I never feel alone when we're together.

But sometimes a man

wants to be alone.

I imagine sometimes a girl

wants to be alone too.

If they love each other,

they're jealous of that.

- I don't want to be away from you, ever.

- Me too.

My life used to be full

of all sorts of things.

Now, if you're not with me,

I haven't a thing in the world.

But I'm not fun for you anymore.

I'm just like a big flour barrel.

You're not. You're more

beautiful all the time.

Just the same,

you're going to town tomorrow...

...and find some gay, young playmate.

- I don't want to be with anybody else.

- Yes, you do.

I'll start the New Year by buying

Catherine's first wardrobe.

I'll find what's necessary.

I'll do it tomorrow.

You should know, you were a nurse.

But so few soldiers had babies

in the hospital.

I did.

Where are you?

Where are you?

I'm right here. I've got a sled.

You sound like a ventriloquist.

- You look like a spook in fairy land.

- Spook for yourself, darling.

All aboard.

I don't think I want to ride.

I want to walk. It's good for the baby.

The baby does what I say.

- Well, may I steer?

- Sure, you can steer.

Ready?

Hello.

- Will it take much longer?

- No.

Don't be impatient.

She's doing a beautiful job.

I must look my best

when I meet little Catherine.

She'll be very impressed.

- Is this your first child, madame?

- No. We have two boys.

That is wonderful.

And two girls.

Oh, monsieur!

Hurry up.

She won't come between us,

will she? The little brat?

No, we'll keep her in a tree.

Won't it be fun?

There'll be three of us.

- Hello, Cat.

- Hello.

- How are you?

- I'm fine, darling.

I brought your things.

- Isn't the doctor here yet?

- In a few minutes.

- How is it?

- The pains are coming quite often now.

This is a real one.

You go away, darling.

- Go out and get some dinner.

- I couldn't.

I may do this for a long time,

the nurse says.

The first labor is usually protracted.

I'd rather stay.

Please go, darling. I think you're

just making me self-conscious.

I want to be a good wife, and have

this child without any foolishness.

You have time, if you would

like to get dinner.

No, I'll be just outside.

Can I go into the delivery room?

Yes, I'm sure it will be all right.

Thank you.

Bear down as hard as you can.

I'm having fine pains.

That was a very big one.

It will be soon, now. I can tell.

Yes, my dear. We'll give you some

gas, to ease the pain.

I don't want to make any fuss.

- Darling?

- Yes.

I just wanted to be sure

you were here.

I won't leave.

That's a good boy.

Darling, I have the most

wonderful doctor.

He's been telling me

the most wonderful story.

When the pain came too badly,

he put me out. He's wonderful.

- You're wonderful, doctor.

- You're drunk.

I know it. But you shouldn't say it.

Give it to me!

I'm sorry I go on so long.

I thought I would do it so easily.

I try as hard as I can.

I push down but it goes away.

Here it comes!

Give it to...

Please, doctor, give me enough

to do some good.

It doesn't work.

It doesn't work!

I don't care if I die, if it will only stop.

Please!

Please make it stop!

Can't they give me something?

- Doctor...

- lf they could only give me something.

It doesn't work.

Nothing works.

Oh, darling...

I'm just a fool.

I wanted so to have this baby and not

make trouble. And now I'm all gone.

- All gone to pieces. It doesn't work.

- My brave darling.

I'm not brave anymore...

...I'm all broken.

- In a little while...

- They just keep it up till they break you.

It'll be over in a little while.

I won't die, will I, darling?

No. I promise you won't.

I don't want to die

and leave you, but I...

...I get so tired of it...

...and I feel I'm going to die.

Nonsense. Everybody feels that.

I always knew I was going to die.

You can't. You won't.

I won't let you.

You wouldn't do any such foolishness.

You wouldn't die

and leave your husband.

Don't mind me, darling.

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