A Little Help Page #6

Yeah, no, I was.

I just came out here to...

Oh, okay.

Well, I just came out

for a beer and a smoke myself.

The other kind.

Ah, a little impromptu

degeneracy festival.

That's exciting.

Come on up.

Mm?

Mm, no, thanks.

Pot makes me

kinda paranoid.

All right.

(Chuckles)

Look, your mom!

Oh, God.

(Both laugh)

Oh, God damn it.

Wow, you start off paranoid.

Oh, no,

that's all I need right now

is for my mother

to catch me smoking pot.

What could she do?

What could she possibly do to

you at this point in your life?

I don't know.

More of the same, I guess.

So does Kathy know

you come out here to...?

(Chuckles)

God, no.

Are you kidding?

She'd pass out.

And on the way down,

she'd call the FBI.

(Both laugh)

No, I keep my weed stash

well hidden...

Just right next

to my kiddie porn.

- You don't have kiddie porn.

- No...

Not kiddie.

I don't know...

What's the cutoff?

Stop it.

You're making me wonder.

Oh, no, I'm just a mid-level

perv, nothing exceptional.

Although, I guarantee you,

every man worries what his wife

will find in his closet

if he drops dead one day.

Oh, God. I am sorry.

That's was what you call... right there,

that's what you call a faux pas.

(Both chuckle)

Don't worry.

It's the weed.

They should

make this stuff illegal.

So, how you doing

with all that, anyway?

What, widowhood?

Yeah.

Um...

Fine, I guess.

(Chuckles)

"Fine?"

I don't know, I mean, I'm a

mess, but I was a mess before,

so I don't know

what's from what.

It's gotta be

different, though.

I guess.

The lies are different.

Oh, here's something

that's different...

Um, a guy asked me out today.

What? Who?

This guy, a patient,

but not one of mine usually.

I was covering for Donna.

Um, he's a computer

something-or-other.

Wow.

Goin' out with him or...?

No. No.

I mean, he's okay looking,

and he's nice, but...

I don't know, it was just

weird that it happened,

you know, just like

out of the blue.

Well, you've got that allure,

Laura Pehlke. That allure!

Yeah, I think it was the bloody

smock that put him over the edge.

(Both laugh)

Oh, man.

When I was on the tennis team

in high school,

I used to check you out all the

time from the practice courts.

You and those other two girls,

always smoking behind the gym.

Oh, um, Brittany Nuzzolese

and Rhonda Calvaruso.

- Yes! Oh, my God.

- Yeah.

You had those red jeans.

(Both laugh)

And that laugh.

Oh, that laugh...

It made me nuts.

I used to purposely hit the ball over

the fence and go, "a little help!"

You remember that?

Um...

I think so.

Yeah, you never helped.

I'm sorry. I was kind of

oblivious back then.

I still am, I guess.

But you knew I was in love with you

since, like, seventh grade, right?

No.

- (Laughs) No.

- Come on.

How can you be

that oblivious, Laura?

I used to talk to you

every day...

About some stupid

homework assignment

or whatever crazy thing

I could come up with.

And you were always really polite

to me, which I appreciated,

but then as soon as you

could manage it, you'd...

Pfft! Just walk away.

I remember I thought

you were funny.

Oh, well, that's nice.

No, I didn't mind

you walking away.

Then I got to watch you

go down the hall.

You had that great ass...

Oh, had.

Yeah.

Have.

Oh, my God.

I'm sorry.

I'm such an idiot

tonight!

- And I'm gonna shut up.

- No.

Mmm. (Kisses)

Can I admit something really strange

and disturbing because I'm stoned?

Please.

(Both chuckle)

Okay...

Um, this is gonna sound...

(Sighs)

Okay, wow.

Okay, the main... not the main

reason, but a big reason

that I married Kathy...

Was that she

was your sister.

I always thought that

if I could be married to you,

everything would be okay.

But that wasn't

gonna happen, right?

So there was your sister.

She wasn't as pretty as you,

but she wore her hair

longer then.

And from certain angles I could

kind of imagine that she was you.

So I married her.

Huh.

How's that working out for you?

Not so well.

Where were you?

Having a cigarette.

Don't start.

I wasn't going to say a word.

Paul:
Back from my walk!

God, he's obsessed.

He walks even in a blizzard.

(Phone rings)

So, I spent a few minutes

with Dennis.

He seems all right,

considering.

Yeah, he's all right.

So, the new school

is working out, then.

In its way, yes.

Okay, sweetheart.

Kathy:
She's right here.

Hang on a sec.

Laura? It's for you.

It's mel.

Mel? Why is he

calling me here?

He said he's been trying to find you

all day, so he decided to try here.

Hello?

You gotta be picking up

your messages, kid.

I can't be hunting you down

like this when I need you.

Sorry. What's up?

How well do you know

this girl who worked with Bob...

Julie Cantoni?

What about her?

The other side called her in

for a deposition.

Tomorrow afternoon.

Any idea why?

She's the one, right?

She's the girl?

Laura?

Yeah.

Yeah, well,

don't sweat it too much, kid.

I mean, really...

Even if she does tell,

it won't kill the case.

It just might make them

feel more bold, that's all.

- Meaning what?

- Oh, I don't know.

These things

are such psych-out games.

The worst case is they

lowball us on the settlement

and we're forced to go

win this thing in court.

Now, how well do you know

this Julie character?

Think she'll say anything?

I don't...

Are you eating?

The thing is,

our life would be a lot easier

if she didn't say anything

at all about...

You know...

But what are you gonna do?

It is what it is, right?

What can we do?

I know it's late.

I'm gonna let you go, Laura.

Have a good night.

(Phone beeps)

So, what's going on?

What?

With the lawsuit.

How far along is it?

Um, it's...

I think I'm gonna

drop it, actually.

Drop it? Now? Why?

Kathy, I hate this thing

so much.

I can't keep...

I just need to move forward,

you know?

That's insane, Laura!

I know that this isn't fun,

but right now

it's your

whole financial future!

I can figure out a way to manage.

People do it.

We can move

into an apartment or...

No, but you're so far

into it now!

Mel said the depositions

are almost over!

If you know that, why did you

just ask me how far along it was?

I don't know all the details.

I ran into him at a party and he mentioned it.

That's all I know.

Kathy, why don't you

just do it?

Why don't you sue Dr. Bronstein and

tell me how it all comes out, okay?

- Oh, will you just grow up!

- What? It was your idea in the first place!

I'm obviously just getting

in the way here!

Oh, I am so sick

of this family

treating me like

an overbearing witch!

My brother-in-law was killed

by an incompetent doctor...

Am I not supposed to care?

You care too much.

Do you care at all?

Go to hell.

Because I

really wonder sometimes...

Do you even slightly appreciate

what you got when you married Bob?

What you

were lucky enough to get?

"Lucky"?

Yeah, lucky.

Being pretty is luck, Laura,

that's all it is.

(Phone rings)

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