A Modern Twain Story: The Prince and the Pauper Page #7

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Maybe you'll still have a career.

- What the... Eddie!

- Can we get Eddie on set, please?

- Take him away.

- Eddie, what the heck is this message?

I don't know. I gotta go on set.

- I'll talk to you later.

- No, Eddie, wait!

- Good afternoon, gentlemen.

- Yeah, hi.

- We want to go to a movie set.

- Which one?

Actually, we're extras

on the Eddie Tudor project.

They didn't tell us

where we're supposed to report.

- Spy Teen III?

- That's it.

Has there been a kid claiming

to be Eddie Tudor

trying to sneak in here, yet?

No, sir, not yet.

- Section 3, gentlemen.

- Oh, thank you.

Hey. I'm with those guys.

You must be pretending to be Eddie Tudor.

- Section 3.

- Thanks.

Now, Eddie, big, big scene, okay?

This is it. I don't have a lot of time.

I need you to get this in one, maybe two

for me, okay? Can you do that?

- Yeah, I...

- Great, buddy. Let's go! Let's get this.

Okay, look. I talked it over with Charles,

and he said if you want to do two front flips,

it's fine.

But the tumble has to be sped up.

The timing has to be right

or it won't look real, okay?

I will not compromise timing.

You have a problem with this,

you can talk to your director.

Honestly, I've been with you

since you were five, doing stunts.

What is the problem, all of a sudden?

Okay, okay. Relax, relax.

We've got a sequence to shoot.

Now, are you set on two flips?

Okay, then, it's settled.

Just speed up the tumble.

Can you speed up the tumble?

- Yeah, speed up the rumble. Got it.

- Tumble. Tumble.

He's not ready.

We have professional stuntmen to do this.

- Why you don't do that? That's crazy.

- Okay. Relax, relax.

Okay, remember,

Evil Darkness will hurl you through the air

at top speed.

You'll land into the tumble,

and at twice the timing,

catapult yourself into two front flips,

which I think is egregious, but it's fine.

Bounce back to your feet. Big finish.

Jump into the racecar and drive away, huh?

Should be lovely.

You ready for rehearsal?

Rehearsal's up!

I don't think, I mean...

Well, I am thinking about it, but...

Get out of my way!

- Hey!

- Stop, you punk!

Oh, thank God.

- Tom?

- Pop?

- Mom!

- Eddie?

- Julia?

- Miles.

Oh, my God.

Julia.

I'm Harlin now.

- Mom?

- Then who are you?

I tried to tell you. I'm Tom Canty.

You're dead!

Wait, wait. Come back here.

Hey! We've got a scene to shoot.

- You took my identity.

- They switched locations.

I got kidnapped by your creepy grandpa.

And I got yelled at by your mom a lot.

Oh, my God. Eddie!

Eddie! Come here. Eddie! Eddie!

I mean, Eddie. Eddie!

- I mean... Eddie.

- Mom.

I didn't know that that wasn't you.

- That's horrible!

- I know.

I am so sorry.

- I am so sorry. I am...

- Okay, listen.

- I have to tell you something.

- What?

I know you push me hard

because you love me.

Yes, baby. It's because I love you.

Because I love you.

- I missed you, Jerry.

- Oh, I missed you, too, Eddie.

Tom? Wait a minute. Are you Tom?

Yeah, Pop. It's me.

- Why isn't that you?

- It's a long story.

- I don't get it.

- I'll tell you everything later.

- Hey, Miles.

- Hey, Tom.

- You really did it this time, huh?

- I know.

- I love you, kid. I love you.

- I'm proud of you, buddy.

So you're... You're Eddie, he's not.

Look, I just need someone

to shoot this scene. So let's get on with it.

- Oh, yeah.

- Okay. Go get them, tiger!

Go get them, baby.

Harlin.

Now, that's what I call a family.

- I had no idea you had a son, Julia.

- My name's Harlin.

- No, it's not.

- Yes, it is...

not.

You know, when I...

When I left town, I didn't...

- I didn't...

- Miles, don't.

- Really, I'm not looking for an explanation.

- No.

It was because of me.

Because I was no good for either of us.

Eddie's a great kid. Talented, too.

I got to know him a little bit

when I thought he was Tom.

Yeah, he's really dramatic.

Guess he gets that from me, huh?

Yeah, those crazy kids. He's your son.

- What?

- What?

Yeah.

I didn't tell you because I just figured

you really wouldn't care.

I mean, you left, so...

Well, that might have been

valuable information for me to have.

I might have stayed.

Yeah, well, now you know.

I owe you a big apology,

you little actor, you.

- I tried to tell you.

- You really did.

He really did try to tell me.

But now at least I know why you were

so anxious to get back to Palm Beach.

So listen, I've been thinking.

- You are a real natural.

- Oh, thanks.

The kid's got talent. Did you know that?

And I've been thinking.

This production company's gonna do

a remake of Prince and the Pauper,

Mark Twain's,

and they were going to use a set of twins,

but I don't know about you, but I think

Tom and Eddie would be fantastic.

And let's face it, they fooled us.

Yeah, I guess they did.

So you want to do something like that?

I mean, act in a real film?

Hey, I'm good at it.

You could be good at anything, Thomas.

I want to know if it's what you want to do,

you know? And even if it's hard.

Yeah.

- No more landscaping?

- No more landscaping.

I want to be in the movies.

Okay. Then...

Let's do it.

- Oh, thank you, Pop! Thank you so much!

- You bet, kid. You bet.

- Thank you, Jerry.

- Oh, Tom.

- You having fun?

- Yeah.

I'm actually glad to be back.

Sorry I took your car.

Sorry I didn't believe you.

Don't worry. I will pay you back

for the bail and that stuff.

You don't worry about that. Really.

Oh, you know, you're a lot younger

than I was when I first started doing this.

You know what the hardest lesson

I ever learned was?

What?

Be gracious. Treat people with respect.

Do you do that?

I will now.

That's good.

That's good.

Thou lookest tired and hungry.

What is thy name?

Tom Canty, and it pleases thee, sir.

- Where dost live?

- Offal Court.

Come with me.

And cut!

That was great, guys.

- That's a print.

- Beautiful, beautiful guys.

So the apple doesn't fall too far

from the tree, does it?

No, I guess not.

- That was a great job, Tom.

- Thanks.

Yeah, you too, pig head.

Thanks for noticing, snot nose.

Just kidding.

Okay. Who wants what?

- All right. I'll see you later.

- I want a hamburger.

I'll take a veggie dog.

One hamburger, one veggie dog.

Coming up.

- A what?

- A veggie dog.

A veggie dog? What's a veggie dog?

You know,

a hot dog made out of vegetables.

You're weird.

- L.A. Is pretty nice, huh?

- Yeah, it's really hot.

- And it's not humid like it is out in Florida.

- Get used to it.

I do miss my lawn chair.

- I bet you do.

- Sometimes.

- So what do you guys want to do today?

- You got a football?

- Yeah.

- Yeah, let's play some football.

Hike!

All right, show me what you got.

You will love this.

It's simple and beautiful, okay?

First, the right.

He comes back, and then gauche.

And now, pice de rsistance.

I don't know. Give me some...

Jazz it up a little bit.

Jazz, jazz. What is this? Dance?

How about this?

No, no, I don't know. Weak.

It's weak. Hit him again.

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