A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square Page #5

Yeah, as a matter of fact, I've got

two weeks paid coming to me.

You've got more than two weeks,

sonny.

More like 25 years.

Jeez, if I scared that easy,

I'd have been dead long ago.

Nicked?!

Who told you he'd been nicked?

Landlady.

Pigs walked in, wrecked the place,

turned it inside out, took him off.

He must have been shopped. Right.

Who the hell

would want to shop Pinky?

Have you bought a lawyer?

Yes. Mr Berger. Good.

Give Mr Foxy my key on account.

I swear to God, I wasn't even there.

I'm clean, I'm telling you.

What did you do with it, Pinky?

Do with what?!

Where did you ditch the gun?

You got guns on the brain.

I told you a million times,

I never carry a gun!

I swear on the Bible! Never!

That's another of your principles,

is it?

Pinky's Principle No.2...

"I don't carry a gun."

Oh.

You remember those numbers

we were looking at the other day?

These ones.

Remember these, do you?

I found out what these mean.

These are the numbers of the

combination of the safe in the bank.

Oh, wow!

The combination to the safe!

In the bank. Yes.

Oh, wow.

That's unbe... That's unbelievable.

Yes. Found them

in your other jacket, didn't we?

Like I've been telling you

all along... Somebody planted them.

Yeah.

I'm being set up.

There's your proof. There it is.

That's right.

There's the proof.

HE SLAMS DRAWER SHU There it is.

Things don't look so hot, huh?

They certainly

don't look so hot for you.

On the other hand,

they look pretty hot for me.

I want legal assistance.

Well, oddly enough, there's a legal

gentleman waiting to see you now.

Somebody sent him.

Kind of them.

You have one way out, and that is

to cooperate with the police.

Cooperate with them?!

Cooperate. It's a very good word.

Cooperate is a lousy word.

My advice is to put

your own interests first.

Secondly, to tell the truth.

If I tell the truth,

they'll kill me.

Mr Green, I am quite sure

that the police will make sure

that you're

adequately protected.

No way! Who are you trying to kid?

If I rat them out...

..they'll put my ass in a sling

permanently.

How did it go, son?

My lawyer agrees with me 100%.

I was set up.

Yes.

That means

you're going to take the rap

and they're going to take the money.

Listen, chief...

You gotta give me an option.

I mean...if I talk,

do I get credit?

Always give credit

where credit's due.

That's Watford's law.

Willing cooperation's

taken into account.

They're gonna be

after me the rest of my life!

Listen...

Make it three years and help me

with a disappearing act and I'll talk.

Three years maximum

and a new passport?

Huh? How's that? I couldn't be

fairer. And you got a deal.

The Metropolitan Police

doesn't make deals.

As least, not officially.

But er...I'll see what I can do.

Take my meaning?

Have a word with the judge.

I don't know about that...

But you scratch my back...

I'll scratch yours.

That's the name of the game,

isn't it?

Why don't you tell me

the whole story?

You'd never believe me.

Try me.

Where do I start?

Start at the beginning.

That's the best place.

The day I got out of prison...

..I swore I was never going back

to the joint.

I was going to go straight.

And I meant it, too.

No more running away from Kojak and

that Mickey Mouse Ivan the Terrible.

Let him believe his own bullshit.

I was going to work -

licensed electrician,

which is my trade by profession.

So...

my parole officer sent me up

for this job.

Security outfit. Global.

So, one day,

they get this urgent call

from this bank.

They say their wiring's shot.

I go over there and they're good

people. They take me on regular.

And er...I felt

I was morally obligated.

Morally obligated?

Yes, that's nice. I like that.

Go on, then.

So I'm crawling inside

this false ceiling,

and all of a sudden - phoom! -

goes a hammer.

And there's a hole.

I put my eye to the hole and -

oh, my God, what I saw!

So, you know,

round about this time -

it was my birthday -

someone gave me the telescope.

I had it in my bag, I put it to the hole

and... you know... curiosity's no crime!

Come on, out you come.

Got your driving licence?

Do you have a ticket, sir?

Oh, yes, here it is.

Only one person travelling?

Just me.

I need a wheelchair.

We'll arrange it.

Passport, please.

Thank you.

Thank you, sir.

Operator, get me Scotland Yard.

Brrr! Good day to be leaving the country.

I hope you have a nice holiday.

SIREN BLARES:

Would you like some more champagne,

sir? Oh, thank you.

Did you enjoy the journey, sir?

Yes, lovely. No problems.

Thank you so much.

It's Mr Drew, isn't it? Yes.

Mr Bernard Drew?

That's correct.

Could I see your passport, sir?

Why do you want to see MY passport?

Do you want to see mine?

You'll be more comfortable

sitting down.

We can just wheel you away.

HANDCUFFS TIGHTEN

Oh, Foxy. Pinky. Good to see you.

What's happened? I don't know, man.

They dragged me in here

for no good reason.

Mum and me are worried.

Yeah? How do you think I feel?

How is your ma? Fine. Considering.

How's the garden? Huh? Has she been

out back working on the garden?

Digging, you know?

Those flowers of hers are beautiful.

Maybe it's time to transplant with

the weather like this. Come on, Green.

Come on, Mr Fox.

Do you know what I mean?

Take it easy. Come back soon.

Come on. We're going for a ride.

I don't want to.

The Superintendent's waiting.

Where are you taking me?

To pick up your whack.

Got the spades in the back,

have you? Yes, sir.

CAR APPROACHING:

Get the stuff out of the back.

All right, lead the way.

Well?

Right under there.

OK, get back in the car.

Give me one of those spades.

Dig round the other side.

Give it a shove!

I think this is worth

a shot in the Gazette.

Ask Trevor to bring my Polaroid

off the back seat of the car.

Watford and his whopper!

GUNSHOTS:

What the hell was that?!

GUNSHOTS:

Trevor, come with me!

GUNSHOTS:

Hey! What are you doing?

Rabbiting. Ferreting with bleepers.

Ah. Hey, squire, don't you point

those guns in the wood, right? OK.

GUNSHOTS:

Incredible. What's that, Trevor?

Radio-controlled ferrets.

Rather like us in a way, innit?

Let's have that picture, then.

What... What's up, sir?

That pipe...

Have you moved that pipe off there?

I've never seen a pipe, sir.

Bloody hell!

Come on, Trevor!

Get that car started!

Pinky babe, lunchtime.

Steak, tomato, jacket potato.

A lovely slice of chocolate cake.

Ma's special.

Come on.

Your paper, sir.

Thanks.

See you, pal.

See you.

During the night,

a grave was opened

and the coffin, undamaged,

stood on end in the hole.

When interviewed, the vicar said,

"Is nothing sacred?"

You have all been found guilty

of perpetrating the biggest bank robbery

ever to take place in this country,

and the penalties must be severe.

I sentence you to...ten years.

15 years.

20 years.

25 years.

Green, step forward.

Lucius Percival Green, to your credit

is the fact that you plead guilty

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