A Royal Scandal Page #12

What woman doesn't, when it comes to her age?

I'm not going to be 33. I am 33.

33? Oh, that's very young, Your Majesty.

Yes, to a man with your gout.

You underestimate yourself. One doesn't have

to have a swollen toe to admire Your Majesty.

Why, only yesterday,

someone saw you in your carriage.

- Who?

- The French ambassador.

Oh, my goodness, the French ambassador!

Whatever happened to the French

ambassador? Is he still in St Petersburg?

Not only is he in St Petersburg,

but, by coincidence, he's in the anteroom.

He raved about Your Majesty.

- Don't you think I ought to see him?

- By all means.

- I'll get him right now.

- Just a moment, Nicolai.

All right, now, Nicolai. Bring him in.

Your Majesty,

I have the high honour to announce the arrival

of the emissary of His Royal Majesty,

King Louis XV.

Ambassador plenipotentiary,

Vicomte de Bayeuls,

Comte de Bayon Valez, Baron de Villau,

and keeper of the king's seal,

Marquis de Fleury.

Vicomte de Bayeuls, Comte de Bayon Valez,

Baron de Villau, Marquis de Fleury,

we welcome you to Russia.

In the name of my sovereign,

I thank Your Majesty

for the most gracious expression of welcome

to the humble servant of my king.

My monarch and the whole French people

united in admiration and respect

for the grand Empress, the light of the East,

whose statesmanship is only surpassed

by her military genius.

And, if Your Majesty permits,

may I add the personal note

- to the impersonal formality of the occasion?

- Please, Monsieur le Marquis.

I have seen portraits -

many, many of Your Majesty -

and I have heard reports most glowing

about the beauties and charms of Your Majesty,

but the palette of the painter

has not colours enough to paint.

And the lyre of the poet

has strings not tender enough

so sing about the beauty which my eyes

have the good fortune to dazzle at.

Thank you, Monsieur le Marquis.

But I want you to know that compliments

of that kind don't mean much in Russia.

They don't mean anything in France.

It's just our French way of saying hello.

Well, that's very forthright, Monsieur le Marquis.

I hope you're going to be just as outspoken

in discussing the political situation.

Sit down, Marquis.

The imperial permission to sit in the presence of

Your Majesty cannot remain unanswered.

In the name of my sovereign, I thank

Your Majesty for allowing the humble servant...

- Look, just sit down.

- Thank you, Your Majesty.

Any decision on Private Chernoff, Your Majesty?

Please don't interrupt me.

I'm very sorry, Marquis.

So, you saw me in my carriage.

Yes, Your Majesty, and I will always cherish.

It is the impression suprme.

Your Majesty travelling in her carriage

looked like spring on wheels.

And I mean the season,

not the thing which gives a bounce.

When Your Majesty smiled at the crowd,

it was putting to shame

the smile of the Mona Lisa.

There is old saying: "See Naples and die. "

I say:
"See Catherine and live. "

Vive Catherine the Great.

Thank you, Monsieur le Marquis.

That was charmingly expressed.

- Wasrt it, Nicolai?

- Very charming, Your Majesty.

Spring on wheels.

Smile of Mona Lisa.

See Catherine and live.

Of course, I don't believe a word you said,

but I'm awfully glad you said it.

And what about Anna?

- What Anna?

- Anna Jaschikoff.

Well, what about her? Why do you bother me?

Can't you make a decision yourself?

Must I do everything?

- For heavers sakes, do what you want.

- Thank you, Your Majesty.

You see, Marquis, that's the trouble.

I have to attend to everything myself.

Everybody wants something.

"Your Majesty" this, "Your Majesty" that.

My dear Marquis,

you see me surrounded by thousands of people

in glittering uniforms.

I'm never alone.

And yet I'm lonelier than the loneliest creature

in the loneliest corner of all my lands.

I'm lonely, Marquis.

I do not dare to compare myself to Your Majesty,

but me, I am lonely too.

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