A Serbian Film
A SERBIAN FILM:
Directed by Srdjan Spasojevic
Baby, I'm gonna f*** you up!
Are you insane?
Haven't we agreed about
putting away your flicks?
What's that?
Give it to mommy.
Sorry, but it's
not a big deal.
I saw my first porn
when I was his age.
How are you, kiddo?
But your dad wasn't
starring in it!
Maria, I'm sorry
I didn't mean it.
I dug up that DVD because...
Laylah called and
wanted to see me today.
Baby, you want mommy
to make you a toast?
The jumping bread!
Mom, what was dad
doing there?
Nothing, hon.
Just playing with a girl friend.
It's like a cartoon
for the grownups.
Honey, I have to pay
for Petar's singing lessons.
Bye, dad.
- Bye, dad.
Easy on that whiskey.
Rye kills sexual appetite.
That's why I drink it.
So, how's family life?
- Nice.
How are Petar and... Maria?
Yes, Maria.
They're fine.
Next year Petar's
starting school.
It'll be interesting
when they ask about
his father's occupation.
His father is a fine gentleman
in a premature retirement.
The problem with that pension
is that it's not lifelong.
How much do you have
stashed? 5 or 10 grand?
Milos, you were more
than just a porn star
you were an artist.
All actresses you worked with
wanted to marry you.
You're still an artist,
but with a temporary block.
And I'm your guardian angel.
Listen.
Something big is about to
happen. Artistic pornography
of the highest level.
Here, in Serbia.
In Serbia? -Only filmed here,
but for the foreign market.
Terribly professional.
Phenomenally paid. If you accept
your family will be settled
till the end of Petar's life.
The man's name is Vukmir.
He'll call you in a few days.
Be nice to him.
Here's something for the junior.
Wow, where's his p*ssy?
You didn't tell me you brought
your copper bro to the meeting.
I came on my own. I knew you'd
be here and couldn't miss
a chance to see you.
I'm your great admirer.
You're well preserved.
Who's the plastic surgeon
we have to thank to?
You know I started early.
I don't need plastic yet.
Everybody needs it.
These don't
So long, fags.
Milos, you heard my advice.
A hooker!
- A porn star.
Has-been.
You know the kind of work
she did after you married?
I know.
No one could handle
a dick like she could.
A natural talent.
Funny she hasn't
contacted her dealer
in the past few years.
Is she off drugs?
Doubtful. A new,
rich provider, more likely.
You'll alienate me
from my friends
if you keep checking on them.
Friends, in Serbia?
You can't check them enough.
I gotta go.
Say hello to your kid
and his beautiful mom.
I'm paying for the bite.
So long.
- Bye.
Sleeping time, hands up.
Dad?
- Yes?
Know that friend of yours
that you were
beating in the video
It's only a movie. Make believe.
When dad was young.
I know, but while
I was watching it
I felt something
strange. - What?
Like some kind
of a wheel, spinning.
A wheel? Where?
- Down there, near my willie.
Several of them,
like a family, traveling.
Do they live in me?
They do, hon, in all of us.
We all have them.
Everyone in the world?
- Yes, everyone.
They're gone now,
so close your eyes
think of them and
you'll fall asleep faster.
What language is that?
I'm translating
for some Swedes.
Swedish? I'm great in it.
That's right.
Wait, I know more.
Listen to this.
You would be a mega star.
So, you say Laylah is
offering you a serious job?
So she said.
It's strange.
Why would anyone
offer me big money
after such a long pause?
In Serbia?
And after all the crap
I shot, look at this.
Maybe they need
the only porn star
a university diploma.
Do you miss it?
What?
- The job.
I don't know. No.
I miss the money so we could
escape away from here.
All those poor girls
you threw away like condoms...
How come you've never
done me like them?
Well, I love you.
I've just f***ed them.
Does it mean that you
never wanted to f*** me?
Am I talking to the
Balkan sex god.
Nikola Tesla of
world pornography?
You must be Vukmir?
Of course. Milos, if you're
ready to change your life
right now and provide
your family for good
a car will be waiting
at your door in 30 minutes.
You just hop in, and take
a ride towards fulfillment
of your personal and
my professional fantasies.
Can't wait to meet you!
to such an artist, I'm Vukmir.
I'm Milos, nice to meet you.
Right hand is the
sex center in any man,
It's direct line between
your brain and cock.
Ever since you childhood.
Your hand is special
for it has jerked
such a special cock.
Milos, it's an honor
to shake a hand
to such an artist of f***.
Pornography is art,
but people can't see that!
Why not?
Because they just want
to jizz into a napkin
what they can't
into a woman.
These movies are
mostly made so that
those who can't
get laid can cum.
They're made by butchers
who can't tell a camera
from a broom.
Their 'actors' would be
f***ing a hole
in the wall if there
were no p*ssy.
Do you know
what proves that
there is art in pornography?
What?
You, Milos.
You are the proof!
Your sense of handling
a woman, your rhythm
of exhausting her,
and then, when she is reduced
to a dog-sh*t, to win her back.
And your love for it,
that's art.
Sadly, this is
no country for real art.
Where there is no life,
there can't be real art.
A real talent will rot here,
while maggots
are giving press conferences.
Have you done anything
I could've seen?
I'm doing stuff
that no one else is.
Just for the selected clients.
All right, but what is it?
Art, naked art!
Truth.
Real people, real situations,
real sex...
minimal editing.
There's a serious script.
We know it, you don't!
And what am I
supposed to do?
The same as always, Milos.
Just stand before the cameras,
whip out your cock,
and f*** until it's raw.
I dunno, I'm a little tired
of cameras and f***ing.
You're also tired of
humping scum
any time your family
needs money.
Kissing some
wretched c*nts
with the same lips
you'd kiss your kid.
Thanks, doctor.
What's that?
- The contract.
No need to read all,
just the numbers.
Something wrong?
I don't know what I'm
signing, what I'm shooting.
You're not supposed to know.
If you knew,
you wouldn't be so good.
In a winter night
way up the hill
A creek was frozen
and covered by the snow.
A bunny's weeping
for that frozen creek
young bunny's crying
with all his heart.
But poor li'l bunny
there upon the hill
perhaps he' after the swallows
heading for a warmer South.
Vukmir! Sounds like a name
of one of your guys
at the Hague tribunal.
Are you sure he's not
an arms dealer?
No, he's some kind of
an artist philosopher
with a grand plan.
So, is it grand?
Dunno, but seems like he
desperately needs me
since he's willing
to offer such cash.
How much?
I won't tell you.
Yes you will,
or I'm not giving it back.
OK, I'll tell you,
just let go.
Don't tell me you refused?
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"A Serbian Film" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 28 Dec. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/a_serbian_film_18715>.
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