A Single Man: Making of a Single Man Page #4

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entirely, and forever.

Light me up, will you?

Darling, you dont look well.

Do you remember that little

heart attack you had last year?

- It wasnt a heart attack.

- Well whatever it was darling...

...you dont look so hot.

Im fine.

I never felt better.

- I'm a little tired. I haven't

been sleeping... - Geo, it's normal.

You were with Jim for 16 years.

I think about Richard every day.

Its hard being alone.

At least you have a job and a life.

Lets have a bit of dinner shall we?

Because Ive worked so very hard.

- What are you talking about? - Seriously,

there no such thing as old anymore.

The other day one of my students

has called me a senior citizen.

I wouldn't mind if old didn't exist...

...but I'm not sure senior is

what I'm aiming for either.

It's all becoming so bland.

It's not why I came to America.

It's like a complete breakdown

of culture and manners.

The young ones have no manners.

The other day at the car wash

a young man looked me up and down...

...and actually asked me if I

was a natural blonde.

- What did you say?

- I looked him straight in the eye...

...and said:
''Let's just say

if I stood on my head...

...I would be a natural

brunette with lovely breath.

- You didn't!

- I did!

And the amusing thing was

that it went right over his head!

You know, you had a mouth on you

even back in London.

Do you remember that old lesbian

who threw her drink over your head...

...because you asked her if

she was hung like a donut.

Geo.

We could always go back to London.

The two of us.

- No, thanks.

- You know you miss it.

I miss it sometimes.

Maybe if Jim had lived.

He loved being in England. He asked us

to stay the last time we were there.

Do you really think you

would have moved?

I don't know. It's silly to even talk

about it. It was only a fantasy.

What's this?

It's my mother's wedding ring.

I found it a drawer

when I was cleaning out.

Charley my dear, you and I are

both in need of another drink.

Wait!

Wait, wait!

I love this!

- You're insane!

- Come on, old man!

Don't move.

Thank you.

- Very smooth cigarette move.

- I've always wanted to do that.

You don't even smoke.

Well, not for the last

sixteen years. Jim hated it.

What's to stop me now?

It's not as if he's gonna to kill me.

This is so nice, lying here with you.

Don't you ever miss this?

What we could have been to each other?

Having a real relationship and kids?

- I had Jim.

- I know, but I mean a real relationship.

Geo, let's be honest, what you and Jim

had together was wonderful but...

...wasn't it really just a

substitute for something else?

Is that really what you think

after all of these years?

You think Jim was just some

kind of substitute for real love?

Jim was not a substitute for anything.

Do you understand?

There is no substitute for Jim...

...anywhere!

And by the way, what is so real

about your relationship with Richard?

He left you after nine years!

Jim and I were together

for sixteen years!

And if he hadn't died we

would still be together!

What the hell is not real about that?

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

I know how much the two

of you loved each other.

I suppose I'm just jealous that

you and I never had that kind of love.

Actually, I've never had that

kind of love with anybody.

I don't think Richard ever loved me...

...except for the way I looked.

And Clay...

I don't know. You raise

a child and love it...

...and then when they are

old enough they just leave.

Charley, there is nothing

wrong with your life.

You just like feeling sorry for yourself.

It's one of your great pleasures.

And it's not one of yours?

You're as pathetic as I am.

Feeling sorry for myself is definitely

not one of my great pleasures.

Well, it's not one of mine either. I don't

like feeling sorry for myself one bit.

I tried to hold onto

Richard for so long...

...even when it was obvious to

everyone but me that it was over.

And now Clay is grown up.

I mean, what am I doing here Geo?

Tell me, what?

You have plenty of friends.

You'll be fine.

Yes, I have friends.

But none of them need me.

And yes I have you and if you weren't such a

goddamn poof we could have all been happy!

I only have you now

because you lost Jim.

Soon I'll lose you to someone else.

It's not as easy for a woman.

I've done everything the way

I was supposed to and...

...all I have to keep me

company is a bottle of gin.

Maybe you should try

donuts with your gin.

Screw you.

Charlotte, you are dramatic.

I swear you really almost had me.

A tiny tear was beginning to

form in the corner of my eye.

Now stop it.

You are still

breathtakingly beautiful.

When you can be bothered

to get up and out of bed...

...and you stop whimpering about

everything for five minutes.

Go to London.

Change your life.

If you're not happy being a woman

then stop acting like one.

You have all the answers.

No, I don't have any to mention.

If you're so smart why don't you

have something new in your life?

Take that position at Stanford.

You complain about that little school

but you could go anywhere you want.

I think what I've done

has been worthwhile.

I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

I shouldn't have said that.

As much as I dread it, I think

I will go back to London.

Why do you dread it?

When I lived in London last I was

young. I was fresh, I was everything.

Coming to America was such a dream,

it was the icing on the cake.

Going home is defeat.

None of it really worked

out the way I'd planned.

Most things don't work out

the way people plan.

You're just living in the past. You need

to start thinking about your future.

Living in the past is my future.

It doesn't have to be yours.

You're a man.

And you're a bore tonight.

Can't we just feel sorry for

ourselves a little bit longer?

Let's have another drink.

- I don't think so. I have to go. Come on.

Walk me out. - Please, please!

- Come on, I have to!

- No, this was such fun! No.

When will I see you again?

- Aren't you going to England?

- I'll never do that!

It's far too much effort.

Besides, I don't think Jim would want me

to leave you here in LA all alone.

Don't worry about me. I'll be fine.

I've got all the answers. Remember?

What are you doing this weekend?

I think I might just be very quiet.

You never really did take me

seriously, did you George?

I tried to Charley. Remember?

A long time ago.

It didn't really work out, did it?

No, Charley.

Sleep tight.

Patrick, a beer and a

packet of Lucky Strike, please.

Excuse me.

It's too hot in there.

Yes, it is.

- Would you like a cigarette?

- No thanks, I don't smoke.

- This place is really crowded.

- Well, it is Saturday night.

It's usually as bad as this.

People normally just stop by and pick

someone up and then head on down the beach.

Yeah. It's pretty wild out there.

I'm surprised the cops

don't break it up.

- Is it always like that?

- Since the war ended.

It's pretty great actually.

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