A Weekend with the Family

1

[upbeat music playing]

[Travis] Have you ever been in the middle

of everything in your life

falling completely apart,

and you stop and ask yourself,

"Where the hell did it all go wrong?"

This is the moment that ruined it all.

Just look at me,

standin' there looking like

a complete dummy,

just waitin' to get caught.

[stuttering] Hey, girl!

What's goin' on? What are you doing?

[stuttering] What up?

What you mean what...

I just got out the shower.

You the one sneakin' up on...

Babe, what you doin'?

You're such a bad liar, Travis.

You're right, I can't lie to you.

That's why I love you,

'cause you be knowing me.

Babe, you acting a lil' weird.

Got a court case today.

And it's big...

Okay, big day, butterflies, generally...

-Exactly, just a little...

-Okay.

Okay, anyway, so which shoe

shall I wear today?

That's a good one. I like...

-the brown!

-Brown!

Good choice.

You know I make good choices, I chose you.

Okay, I am running super late.

You have a good day at work.

[Courtney] I love you. Love you.

-I love you too.

-Bye, have a good day.

All right, you too.

-[Travis] Love you, girl.

-[Courtney] Love you too.

[music continues]

[gasps]

[laughs]

Mr. Jenkins here

has repeatedly demonstrated

an immense lack of self control...

[aggressively] What? Those are lies!

Lies, lies, lies!

Counselor, control your client, or I will

have him removed from this courtroom.

...as demonstrated in front

of you all today.

[Mr. Jenkins] Object, object. I'm not

going to win, I'm not going to win!

Objection, Your Honor,

my client has done nothing more

than express his religious freedoms.

In fact, the last time I checked,

the practice of voodoo

is legal in this country, and it is absurd

that the counselor and Mrs. Jenkins

have attacked my client's personal

and religious freedoms

in these court proceedings,

all for the sole purpose of monetary gain,

might I add?

-We got this one in the bag.

-I hope so.

I'm paying you guys enough.

Your Honor, it is his religious beliefs

that are in question here.

Overruled.

-You may proceed, Mr. Stanley.

-Thank you, Your Honor.

As we will prove,

it was only after his many infidelities

that he decided to choose

this new "religious" path,

which includes the many perks

of male polyamory and polygamy.

Neither of which did my client,

Miss Jenkins, agree to

on the onset of their marriage,

proving that Mr. Solomon Jenkins here

was just a squirrel

that tried to get his nut and keep it.

You killed 'em!

Squirrel that tried to keep his nut?

Man, really!

Did you see Mr. Clancy in the back?

-I did see him.

-He was even laughing.

That's 14 in a row, baby, we're on a roll.

Clancy and Lynch and Associates.

Here we go, boy!

[both exclaiming indistinctly]

You boys were amazing!

Thank you so much. I feel like I have

a new lease on life.

Don't mention it, Miss Jenkins.

It's our job.

Call me Wanda.

Thank you, Wanda.

You boys be good.

Or bad...

-I think it was the cologne.

-Got to be the cologne.

-Got to get you some.

-I can give...

[Rosie] Yeah, boss,

I had a real good weekend.

Got myself a new lil' thang.

Girl, he was working it out with...

What's goin' on with you, boss?

You're not acting like yourself.

I'm okay. Just thinking.

So, whose ass do I need to kick?

Rosie, everything is fine.

Just got a lot on my mind.

Can my teeth be on your mind?

I just wanna get outta here.

-Jesus!

-[Rosie] Now, wait a minute.

We don't take the Lord's name

in vain here.

Okay, you gotta get your energy together.

-Sorry.

-Tell Jesus that you're sorry.

Sorry, Jesus.

[Rosie] Thank you, that's good.

Your mother raised you well.

At least you got a lil' bit of manners.

I'll make you feel real good,

right about now.

Talking smart to me,

calling Jesus' name in vain,

I'm so sick of these people,

I don't know what to do,

Look at his hair. What's...

Now, he'll be out for ten minutes,

so you need to spill it.

Travis is gonna propose.

How do you know?

I found the ring.

You nosy-ass heifer.

Girl, congratulations!

Court, this is exciting.

Oh, my God! I'm just gonna be an amazing

maid of honor, I know I'm gonna be it.

'Cause we gonna be turnin' it up.

Girl, I got this solo move,

I wanna turn it up.

[in a sing-song voice] Turn it up. What!

I'm doin' it, I'm turnin' it up,

but you ain't turnin' it up.

Ain't you excited?

Of course, I am.

Travis is amazing.

I couldn't see myself

being with anybody else.

Okay, so then, what's the problem?

Travis hasn't met my family yet.

My family is very strict,

very traditional, and very Korean.

Okay, so then why hasn't he met them?

I think Travis is a little insecure

about my father.

So, I assume that you met his family.

That's another thing.

-Court...

-I haven't met them yet either.

Unbelievable.

I've talked to his mom on the phone,

but I've never met them face to face.

What if they don't like me in person?

What if they don't think I fit in?

Now, come on,

you know that's an impossibility.

You know that.

I just want us to be

one big, happy family,

-You know?

-I do.

And I know how important it is to Travis

for my dad to like him.

Okay, so then, what are you gonna do?

Pray?

Now, prayer's very good.

Yeah, I'll be praying with you,

but I'll be praying for us to turn it up!

Girl, 'cause I got these new moves...

-Girl...

-All right.

-[Rosie] Wake up.

-[Courtney] Wake his ass up.

All right, Steve, you ready?

[Steve] Yeah.

[Courtney] All right. Okay, all right.

Thank you, girl.

Open up.

Ah...

[Courtney] Ew!

[Travis] So what you think?

Are we the two new hotshot attorneys

at Clancy Lynch and associates?

I felt pretty good about myself today.

[both talking excitedly]

[John] That's what I like to see.

You guys are always working.

Great work today, fellas.

You guys really pulled it off.

Thank you, Mr. Clancy.

You guys should be

really proud of yourselves.

I don't remember seeing

a rookie win record like that

since... Hell, myself.

-That's a good thing, right?

-Yes, of course, it is.

We got our eye on you two.

I specially got my eye on you, young man.

Travis, you got a bright future

ahead of you.

Thank you, Mr. Clancy.

Yeah, well, you know what, call me John.

You're part of the family now.

This is the pen!

The board voted, and they will make

their official announcement

on Monday morning.

I don't know what to say!

-John...

-Don't say anything.

Look, just show up at work

on Monday morning,

bright-eyed and bushy-tailed,

ready to work.

I expect you to arrive early

and leave late, just like me.

-Just like you.

-Just like me. Good.

Let me get outta here before my wife

sends out the FBI for me.

But anyway, you guys

enjoy yourselves tonight, you deserve it.

-Have a drink on me.

-Thank you...

John!

[both whisper in amazement]

[both start shouting excitedly]

-I take it you won your case today?

-Yeah.

Fourteen in a row.

Ugh! Smells like Joey drowned you

in shots.

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