A Yank in the R.A.F. Page #3

does she usually dance and sing with eight

beautiful girls at the Regency House?

You don't say, sir. I'm afraid

my aunt will be terribly upset.

(laughs)

Very sorry, sir, but they're all reserved.

I can give you something not too far back.

That won't do, Louis. I want to get

a close look at the chorus.

That's what everybody wants, sir,

a close look at the chorus.

There must be something you can do.

This is an important occasion.

There is a flying officer

at one of our best tables.

- And I'm a squadron leader.

- So you are, sir. This way, please.

Sir, there is a mistake in the reservations.

Would you let me find you another table?

Definitely not.

Excuse me, sir, but I'm sure the squadron

leader will consider it a personal favour.

It's rather important to me.

I'm afraid you can't use your rank to exert

pressure. I'm not ambitious in a military way.

- I'm sorry, sir.

- But if you share my table, I've no objection.

Oh, thank you.

Thank you, sir. And thank you too, sir.

(d "Another Little Dream

Won"t Do Us Any Harm")

- Good, isn't she?

- Very good.

- The singer, I mean.

- So do I.

Really? Would you like me

to introduce you, sir?

- Thank you, but I already know her.

- You do?

How is it everybody knows her but me?

Would you like to introduce me?

No. Anyone who creates

competition for himself is an ass.

- I agree, but I thought I'd try.

- Thanks for the use of your table.

- You're going to meet her now?

- Yes.

If opportunity knocks, shove in

a good word for Roger Pillby.

If opportunity knocks, I'll be speechless.

Thank you.

(both whisper)

- Hello there.

- Hello.

I hate to seem persistent.

- Well, let's face facts. You are.

- Yes, so I am.

Now we've run into each other,

we can have supper.

Oh, I'd like to very much, but...

I'm afraid my husband wouldn't like it.

Your... Oh, really? You're married?

That's the way one usually gets a husband.

It's rather stupid of me. I suppose I should've

considered that possibility, but I didn't.

He wouldn't like me

dismantling your distributor.

No, I'm afraid he wouldn't.

There's nothing wrong with what I did.

That car's as good as ever.

Better, now I know its innermost secrets. Bye.

- May I see you home?

- Uh, no.

No, thank you,

my husband will be along directly.

I see I've made a botch of this all over again.

But I've enjoyed meeting

you once more. Goodbye.

- Goodbye.

- However,

on second thought, since your husband

isn't here yet, I may as well have a cigarette.

I wish you wouldn't.

He might misunderstand.

Oh, I don't see how he could. I'd rather

imagine he'd think the joke was on me.

- Will you have a cigarette?

- No, no, thank you.

- Do you mind if I do?

- Hm? Oh, no.

Perhaps I will have one.

He, uh... he might have fallen asleep.

Quite.

- He works days.

- Really?

- I'm afraid something's detained him.

- Possibly.

- Perhaps I had better run along.

- I'd be delighted to drive you.

- No, that won't be necessary.

- Not necessary, but very pleasant.

(siren)

(man) Air raid. Take cover,

everybody, the alert is sounded.

Take cover. Take cover, please. Air raid.

- The alert's sounded, sir. Take cover.

- Thank you.

Not at all, sir.

Air raid. Take cover.

The alert is sounded. Please take cover.

Shall we go in that church?

It looks quite unperturbed.

All right.

From what I read in the papers,

a church is the one thing they never miss.

A few others seem to have had the same idea.

There's lots of room in front,

among the sinners.

Shall we sit here? I knew that old boy.

He was quite a stickler.

Went to his grave convinced

the Lord made only two kinds of people -

his kind, and the rest of the world.

If he were here tonight,

he wouldn't approve of all this.

- I take it this is a fashionable church.

- Indisputably.

Some of our very best people

have been married here.

- By the way, were you married in a church?

- No.

- Judge's chambers?

- No.

Registry office?

Why all this sudden interest

in my vital statistics?

You may as well know, Miss Brown,

I'm vitally interested.

- You may as well know I'm not married.

- You don't say.

- I only told you that to discourage you.

- Well, it worked perfectly. I was discouraged.

Then you might as well also know

I think you're very attractive.

- Ah.

- But a little late.

I see. There's someone else.

But there must be some hope.

You say I'm attractive. You aren't married.

Unless your wedding's arranged within

the next half-hour, I have a sporting chance.

You must be terribly in love with him.

- Insane.

- I wonder if he knows how lucky he is.

- I... I think so.

- (siren)

- There's the all clear.

- Then I must go.

Of course, they... they may come back.

General feeling seems to be that they won't.

Dull fellows. No feeling

whatever for romance.

Good night.

Shall we say the Ivy,

about one on Thursday?

- What for?

- Lunch.

- There's no purpose in it.

- There's no harm in it either.

All right. The Ivy at one. Good night.

I hope you believe me when I tell you this is

the first air raid I've ever actually enjoyed.

No doubt the spiritual effect of the church.

Good night, Miss Brown.

Oh, hello.

- It's almost two. I'm due back at school.

- I hope I didn't upset your plans.

No, no, it was my fault.

I'm sorry I stood you up.

It's quite all right. How was kindergarten?

Jolly. Some jerk gave us

a lecture on fundamentals.

Over and over again, the same things.

I nearly went nuts.

So I came here to take a nap

rather than going to the Regency House.

- It really doesn't matter.

- Now, don't be like that.

- At least I wasn't out with anybody else.

- Really?

I was. He was very charming.

If I'd known you were here,

I'd have asked him in.

Oh, so that's it, hm?

Trying to make me burn.

Not at all. Just bringing you up to date.

I'm having lunch with him Thursday.

Say.

I believe you were out with somebody else.

I know, honey. I'm a worm.

Gentlemen, you've completed your training

and you're now ready for active service.

And you've got a pretty tough job

in front of you.

But I want to thank you all

for the keenness you've shown

that has helped make my job

such an easy one.

Your appointments will be posted on the

notice board. Congratulations and good luck.

Come in.

- Yes?

- Pilot Officer Baker, sir.

- Oh, the American.

- I've been assigned to your flight, sir.

That's right. I'm glad to have you, Baker.

Take a seat.

Thank you.

I've just been going over your record.

It's excellent.

If it's so good, why wasn't I

assigned to a fighter squadron?

Each man in the RAF is assigned to where

he's most needed and is best qualified to fit.

I think you'll find a bomber has its points.

Perhaps, for those who like

that sort of thing, sir.

But frankly, grousing along over the Ruhr

in a bomber isn't my idea of excitement.

Aren't you labouring under

a slight misapprehension, Baker?

Flying a fighter in a scramble is one thing.

You can go up and get it over with.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes