Abbott and Costello Meet the Invisible Man Page #2

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know where you've been...

but I know where

you're going.

So you let him get away!

Now we can't collect the reward.

Double-crosser.!

You kicked me!

And what's the idea of

calling me a double-crosser?

That wasn't me, that

was him. Don't lie! Ow!

Break it up.

Don't keep the nice

man waiting. Come on.

I know, you saw this man

disappear into space.

That's right.

Do you always see things?

Only when my eyes are open.

Have you ever seen anyone

disappear before? Yes. My brother.

Ah-ha, this may have been

the start of seeing things.

Tell me

about it.

My brother and I were

walking down the street.

All of a sudden, he

disappeared. Into thin air?

No, into

a manhole.

Oh!

How about voices? Do you ever

hear strange voices? Yes, sir.

When does this happen? When I

get the wrong number on the phone.

Oh!

Got a headache? Suppose you

go over there and lie down.

Why? Don't you

believe me sittin' here?

Would you get over

there, please? All right.

Here, lie down.

Perhaps we can find out

something from your subconscious.

Tell me, what's wrong

with me? Well, you see...

Would you

get down there?

Often the conscious

mind will lie...

but from the subconscious

we get the truth.

You know where the subconscious

comes from? The subway?

Look into my eyes.

You're going to sleep.

You're going to sleep. Sleep.

Sleep. One, two, three, four...

What are you doing? I'm countin' cows.

Cows? I'm allergic to sheep.

Sleep. Sleep.

Sleep.

And now you are asleep. I am?

Go to sleep. We must find

out why you are seeing things.

Now, watch this.

Concentrate on this.

Tick-tock.

You forgot to say,

"The mouse ran up the clock. "

You've got to go to sleep! I can't,

I'm too busy looking at this clock.

Concentrate on that.

We've got to help you.

We've got to

make you better.

First we've got to find out

what causes these things.

We must

find out...

What's with that psycho? Nothing yet.

Well, find out what's cooking. Okay.

Wake up, will ya, please?

Wake up. Please wake up.

What's happened here? He was trying

to put me to sleep with this watch.

He kept saying,

"Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. "

Tick-tock.

Tick-tock.

You see, officer? I was...

Where's your head? Oooh!

Wonder what the doc

is doin' here so late.

Somebody's gotta be there. You

think anything happened to him?

I hope so.

Come on, we'll find out.

Why don't you all

get up?

Doc, will you help me

to get them up?

Will you get up, fellas?

Mmm-hmm, tick-tock.

Doc! Doc! What's the matter?

What happened? You were trying to

put me to sleep with your watch.

Tick-tock.

Tick-tock.

Oh, no. Give me that

watch. Get out of here.

Get out of here!

Take it easy.

Did you find out anything? Yes, once

before, he saw his brother disappear.

Into thin air? No, into a sewer!

A fine detective

you are!

You not only mess up

our first case...

but you prove to the cops that

you're a moron. I did not, they did.

I didn't mean to frighten you.

I have a message from Tommy.

He wants you to prove

that he's innocent.

I have a $500 retainer for you. 500 bucks?

You're to take this grip to

the south end of Riverside Park...

that deeply

wooded section.

Leave the grip there and

Tommy will contact you.

Here's

the $500.

We'll get in touch

with you at your house.

Any messages for Tommy? Yes. Tell Tommy

my uncle is working on the reagent.

Thanks for

the $500.

Well, that's that.

Now all we...

So.!

He's invisible,

eh?

Then why take

clothes to him?

What are you two

cooking up on me?

What did this guy

give you to escape?

Don't lie to me.

Ah-ha,

just as I thought.

You'll get no parts of this $500

or the $500 the dame gave me.

That'll teach you to

be honest, someday or other.

Oh, yeah?

No, you don't.

No, you don't!

You leave that alone!

Touch that again, I'll

break both of your arms.

You take this grip...

I told you not to touch it!

Give me

that bill.

Put it there and leave it there.

That's better. Now you...

Give me that bill.

Give me your hand.

Put it in my hand like that

and leave it there!

Take this grip down to the car,

and I'll be right with you.

Hurry up.

Wise guy.

Hello, operator?

Give me police headquarters.

Tommy?

Tommy?

Here's your grip,

Tommy.

Was he in there? Yeah, he

was unpackin' and I'm packin'.

What did you see? An empty

woods full ofTommy Nelson.

Don't give me that invisible

stuff again. Honest.

And there were

footsteps with no feet.

And the grip that was unpackin'

itself. All right, let's go.

That's some disguise. The cops

will never recognize you.

I'm not gonna

get near any cops.

And I'm counting on you guys

to help me. You can trust me.

Tommy.

You can trust me, too.

Thanks. Let's shake on it.

Come on, let's

get out of here!

If I'd known it was you,

I wouldn't have come.

If it's a wild goose chase... There's

a sitting duck right in my car.

You bag him and I'll bag the

reward. I want Tommy Nelson!

I got the keys

in my pocket.

Don't get excited. There's

no use you losing your head.

Cause, I mean...

Oh, Tommy.

Not again.

Come out with your hands up.

What! You again?

I knew you'd do something like

this. Take me to the station!

You gonna see that nice man? Yes,

I'm gonna have my head examined.

I saw another man

in the car when we drove up.

And I'll have your head

examined, too! Come on.

What's your

alibi now?

He did it again. And you did it again...

after me phoning

the cops to be here.

And you did that again!

Now, don't be smart.

I told you not to

get smart, didn't I?

Now, I'll show you

who is the boss.

No, I'll show

you who's boss.

Who said that? The voice is familiar,

but I can't quite place the face.

You brought the cops here and

tried to double-cross me again.

Oh, no, it's Tommy Nelson.

Lou, he's here!

- I touched him.

- I think he touched you back.

If either of you

ever cross me again...

I'll break every bone

in your bodies.

Tommy, I didn't do anything.

Don't give me excuses.

Get in the car.

Yes, sir.

Not in the front,

in the back!

Give me the keys.

Hurry, the keys!

Fine pal

you are!

Stand there and

watch me get beat up.

Bud, believe me, I

didn't see a thing. Yeah.

Boy, I sure

scared that guy.

If we get in an accident,

do you bleed, too?

Mr. Nelson,

I want to apologize.

Okay, from now on,

we'll work together.

You didn't kill your fight manager,

did you? The evidence says I did.

When I stepped out of

the shower that night...

I found O'Hara on the dressing

room floor, beaten to death.

The officer at the door swore no

one else had entered the room.

So, they hung

it on me.

We believe you,

Tommy.

I forgot to tell you, Miss Grace's

uncle is working on the reagent.

Without it, I could become

a raving maniac...

with an uncontrollable

urge to kill.

He ain't kidding.

I hope he's got his driver's

license. I hope he's in the car.

Pull over

to the side.

Tell him,

he's drivin'.

I said,

pull over to the...

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