Accidentally Engaged

1

[chattering]

[man] Didn't see you

here last Friday.

[woman]

No, but I loved the place.

- Friday...

- I know.

Here you go, ladies.

All right, so we got you

your director-approved apron.

Yeah, yeah.

I like the small better.

So, I saw his abs.

- Seriously?

- Yeah.

Yeah. He just ripped his shirt

off right in front of me.

Abs for days.

[woman] What did you do?

Well, I did

what any girl would do.

I just refrained from asking him

to take a selfie with me

for my Instapics.

And you? Are you gonna be able to

handle looking him in the eyes

without stumbling

over your lines?

I think I'll manage.

I mean, he's just a person

like everyone else, right?

[women] Right.

We're ready for her.

Let's go, Clare.

It's Clarissa.

Go, go, go.

Let's go.

I need everyone at their ones!

Okay, guys, quiet on set!

We're gonna roll for rehearsal.

Sound!

All right. Scene 101 A,

take one:
Coffee Shop Crush.

And action.

Hi.

I didn't see you last Friday.

Or the Friday before,

but you were here...

[both] three Fridays ago.

I was visiting my mom

in San Fran.

Aw, that's sweet.

[man] I thought I'd

never see you again.

[woman] Well, I'm here now.

Let me buy you a cup of coffee.

Can I get you anything else?

Think I've got everything I need

right here in front of me.

[all exclaiming]

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry!

[exclaims]

Um... No.

I didn't know the lid wasn't...

Don't sweat it.

Wardrobe has doubles.

Wardrobe has doubles.

Yeah. You, come with me.

Clarissa, honey, you always

gotta check your props.

I know. I made

a complete fool of myself

in front of two of the hottest up-and-coming

actors in Hollywood right now.

Oh! Oh, please!

Honey, Stella is

a notorious diva.

It was probably her bad karma that

caused it to happen in the first place.

And Chas, he's all sexy

soap-appeal, no brains above.

I doubt he'd remember you

if he saw you.

Jeannette, I know how hard you

worked to get me that audition.

Forget it. Okay?

You still got paid, and we'll

keep it on your headshot

until we book you

something better.

Yeah. But what if this small

part led to something bigger?

Clarissa, it was seven lines.

It's not the end of the world

or your career.

You're barely 24.

Yeah. Well, Stella's 24.

So says her publicist.

I'll have you know

that Stella is nearly 30.

And do not compare

yourself to her.

You are a talented actress.

So you're not all

lips and lashes.

But you are beautiful.

You look like

a storybook princess.

And you're vulnerable,

yet you're strong.

Honey, you have star quality,

that's why I signed you.

You're right.

I mean, 'cause if I don't believe

in myself, who will, right?

See? You are a great actress.

What?

Well, even though

you're down on your luck

and you don't believe

a word you just said,

you had me convinced.

Thanks.

All right. You go home,

you get some rest.

And I'm gonna get you out

for a commercial audition

on Friday at two

in Studio City, okay?

I can't. I'm going back home

for a bridal shower, remember?

Yes, you're maid of honor in your

best friend's wedding, right?

The honor is all mine.

All right.

Well, it'll be good for you

to get away. Go have fun!

And, Clarissa...

Life is a movie

if you let it be. I know.

- Okay.

- All right. Go have fun.

- Bye.

- Bye.

Of course I'm coming!

You think I'd miss your bridal shower?

I'm your maid of honor.

Um... About that.

What?

Well, since you don't live here,

and you've been so busy

with your auditions and stuff,

and haven't really been

able to help with planning,

I kind of had

to make you like...

a co-maid of honor.

I'm sorry, you made me a what?

A... co-maid of honor.

Maya, there's no such thing as

co-maid of honor. Are you serious?

Hey, look, it's my wedding, and I can

create whatever kind of title I want.

Look, Riss, I'm sorry.

It's just Kelly's been the one who's

been doing all the grunt work on this.

So, I had to kind of

give her that title.

And you know I wish it were you.

But I realize how busy

you've been with your auditions.

Not anymore. I just got fired.

And now I just got fired from

wedding duties, too. Great.

Look, it's not like that, okay?

I still want you right by my side

on that big wedding day, okay?

Nothing's gonna change

besides a silly little title.

You're my best friend, Riss.

I mean, heck, you're like family to me.

Sister I've never had.

You're right. I'm sorry. It's...

I guess it's a good thing that

Kelly stepped up to the plate.

Yeah. Well, don't get me wrong,

her and Veronica

have been driving me nuts,

but I will say that those two

know how to get stuff done.

[Clarissa] Okay, fine.

But when I get there tomorrow, I'm gonna have

my say in some of the arrangements, too.

Of course you will.

And me and Pete will be there

to welcome you with open arms.

How is the old fart, anyway?

Speaker phone!

Pete! You know I love you.

How am I an old fart?

You're old.

I'm six years older.

You should've seen him

running at the park today.

He fell over

after the first mile.

That is her cooking.

She's trying to keep me heavy

so I'm slow and easy to catch.

So, Riss, how the heck did

you get fired from your job?

I... spilled coffee all over Chas

Hunter and Stella Sommers' laps.

But, Riss, you really

are a waitress.

I know. I must've been,

like, nervous. I don't know.

Well, was it hot at least?

I hope it was boiling hot.

That Stella Sommers deserves it.

She's so full of herself.

Yeah. But what did I do

to deserve it?

I mean, I thought

my karma was pretty on point.

I don't know.

You're just gonna have to leave it

up to a higher calling, I guess.

Okay? 'Cause everything

happens for a reason.

And if this wasn't your ticket to

success, then the next thing will be.

I just wish I could do it over.

Well, when that

opportunity comes,

you just have to make sure

that you're ready to take it.

Aw, thanks. You're the bestest

friend ever, you know that?

No, you are.

Okay, I'm gonna be there this weekend.

I will see you guys.

I cannot wait to just relax

and not think about Hollywood.

Bye!

Advertise your product or brand here

Can I get you guys

anything else?

No. I think we're

all right, thank you.

Perfect.

Uh... Chas.

Hey.

Hi.

You know, I...

I think I came

to the wrong place.

Hey, Melody, can you

watch my tables for a second?

Hey, baby, can we just

meet back at my place?

The menu here isn't so great.

Yeah. I'll pick us up

some takeout.

All right, bye.

You didn't even

look at the menu.

I didn't think my publicist

would like it here is all.

You thought I was gonna pour

cold coffee on your lap again.

I'm not an idiot, you know.

I wait tables for a living.

Really?

Shouldn't you be brunching at the Ivy

with some Teen Choice Award winners?

I don't even know you're name.

Why are you so mad at me?

You're the one who set our

shoot back two hours.

You know what? Does no one blame the

props master for not doing his job?

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