Adam & Paul

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Adam & Paul

Oh, for f***'s sake!

What's wrong with you?

Some f***er's had to glue me

to this thing.

Would you wait

till I get out of me sleeves?

You go that way there.

There's no glue on that bit!

"Made in... Bulgaria. "

- I feel sorry for them, I do.

- Who?

The Bulgarians.

Have nothing, they have.

- I feel sick.

- Yeah.

- What money have you?

- I don't know.

Odds and coppers.

F***...

Where the f*** are we?

- How the f*** did we end up out here?

- I don't know.

I haven't been out

here in years.

F***in' years!

- All right, lads?

- All right, yeah.

- Yeah?

- Yeah, good, yeah.

Nothin' mad goin'

on or nothin'?

Not a f***in' thing!

- Look, lads...

- Yeah?

What's the story about scorin'

around here, do you know?

Well, you could try Martin

in Block B, Flat 63.

- Thanks. - But he won't

open the door to youse.

- Thanks.

- No problem.

- Oh, here, youse wouldn't have

a smoke, would youse? - No.

Thanks.

- Look, I'll do the f***in' talkin',

all right? - Yeah.

- He might want somethin' doin'

or whatever. - Right, good.

Like what?

I don't know.

Bit of f***in' carryin' or whatever.

All right, yeah, a bit of carryin'. Or maybe

put up some shelves or somethin'.

- F***in' whatever!

- Yeah, yeah.

Hello?

- There's nobody there.

- Shut up!

I can hear him movin' f***in'

around. I f***in' smell it.

- Hello! Martin...

- Hey, who's that...? - Martin!

- Hello! - Get away from the door, lads.

The place is crawlin' with viggies.

- Martin... Martin, we just want

to talk to you a minute. - Jesus!

You've three seconds to

get away from the door,

or I'll come out and f***in'

batter ye! - Jesus' sake!

- I swear to God, lads, I will do

f***in' time for youse! - Oh, f***!

- But, Martin, what about

your shelves? - What?

Right, lads, you've asked for it!

Come back here

and you're f***in' dead!

F*** off, ya f***in'... gaybag!

Hey, what are you

doin' out there?

Oh, f***!

- I'm f***ed.

- Yeah.

Here, do we have a plan?

Um...

- Into town.

- Yeah...

- See who's around, what's

goin' on, like. - Yeah.

- Get some money.

- Yeah.

And then score.

Super. Yeah.

- I'm goin' to get sick. - You're grand.

Put your head between your legs.

I'm goin' to have to get off.

I'm goin' to vomit.

You're grand. Hold it.

- Oh, good Jesus!

- Is right.

- I'm goin' to vomit.

- Oh, for f***'s sake!

I'm f***in' freezin'.

I don't think there's any more.

Wait, I've somethin' in me shoe.

Here we go. Come on!

Wait! F***'s sake...

Aaagh! Agh, me f***in' leg!

- I'm f***in' sweatin'!

- Yeah, sick all right!

- All right, Adam and Paul?

- All right? All right?

All right, yeah.

Good, yeah.

Anythin' mad or anythin'?

No, just in here, like.

- Bit of the old skills training

with the young fella. - Oh, right.

- That's your young fella?

- Yeah. That's Georgie Junior.

Isn't that right, Georgie?

Here, I'm talkin' to ye!

No respect for his old fella.

Who had that baba for you, Georgie?

- Tina Blake.

- Blakey's sister, yeah? - Yeah.

All right.

Where are you livin' now, Georgie?

- Why do you want to know?

- I don't. I was just askin'.

Well, Georgie Junior lives with Tina, like.

I mean, we're not together or anythin'.

Not any more, like.

Me and Tina.

- All right. Sorry.

- It's fine, but.

I mean, no hassle, like. I get Georgie on

Wednesdays and the weekends sometimes.

I bring him down here,

or go to McDonald's or whatever.

Throw her a few

bob when I has it.

- Yeah.

- It's the same all over.

- It's the way of the

world, mate. - Yeah.

So, where have youse been

the last few weeks?

- I haven't seen you since...

- Since what?

Matthew an' that.

Just hangin' around, like,

you know? Just layin' low, like.

- So were youse at it

this morning? - What?

- They had his Month's Mind

this morning. - Oh.

- Dead a month, like.

- I didn't f***in' know that.

Right.

Go on, Georgie, kick the ball!

Kick the ball.

Go on, pass us the ball.

Will I kick the ball? - Jesus...

...would you leave the young fella alone?

You're frightenin' the f*** out of him!

Sorry.

- Sorry. - Hey, Georgie,

that's enough now!

You have me f***in' worn out!

- Look, Marian and the gang are over

the far side of the park. - Right.

- Are youse coming over?

- I don't know. Maybe.

Suit yourselves.

Come on, Georgie,

for f***'s sake!

I can't do it now, love.

F*** off and play for a while!

She has me worn out, that one...

always wantin' her hair plaited.

That's cos she's probably seen it on the

telly or somethin'. Britney or somethin'.

I'm right sick of it.

Oh, Jaysus!

Look who it is!

Look over behind Georgie.

F***in' Adam and Paul!

- All right, Georgie?

- All right, Marian?

All right, Marian?

Marian... Orla.

- Wayne.

- Wayne.

Lads. All right, Georgie?

All right, Wayne? Orla.

- Georgie.

- Out for the day, yeah?

Yeah, just havin' a little picnic

for the kiddies.

Throw us over another can, Orla.

It's a lovely day, isn't it?

Hey, Georgie Junior, were you kickin'

that ball, were you?

- He f***in' was, weren't you?

- He's shy, is he? - A bit, yeah.

Come on, kiddo. We'll go and

kick the ball. Come on, Georgie.

It's too f***in' crowded around here!

Come on, kiddo.

Come on!

Will you have a can, Georgie?

No, you're grand. I can't.

- Why not? - Tina would go mad if

she thought I was drinkin' again.

- It's only a f***in' can!

- Well...

Go on.

All right, quick,

before the young fella sees.

- Georgie!

- I'm f***in' comin'!

What happened to you?

- Me?

- Yeah.

I got knocked down by a moped.

- F*** off!

- Serious. - Yeah.

- Dope!

- It did hurt, it did.

Me leg's f***ed.

All scraped an' all, you know.

Orla, give them two a can

before me heart breaks!

- They don't f***in' deserve it!

- Thanks, Marian. - Thanks, Marian.

Here you are.

I never saw youse this morning.

No.

- Thanks! - Sorry.

- He was your mate, lads.

Sorry.

- So did youse just not bother goin'

or what? - We didn't know, Marian.

- Sure!

- We didn't f***in' know!

- That's not my f***in' fault!

- Sorry.

F*** youse!

I'm f***in' sweatin'!

I am.

Well, youse were missed.

Me ma was there an' all.

- Roarin', she was.

- In bits.

Heart is f***in' broken

over Matthew.

She'd like to f***in' see youse!

Waste of time, if you ask me.

Look at the f***in' state o' youse!

Do you remember them three, Orla,

years ago?

Do I f***! Sure, didn't they

practically live in our house?

F***in' idolised them two,

Matthew did. Idolised.

- Adam, Paul and Matthew. Like the

Three Musketeers, youse were. - Yeah?

And now look at youse.

Youse are like the two...

f***in' eejits!

Sorry.

He'd have been better off

if he'd never set eyes on youse.

Sorry.

Here...

Light up that spliff for yourselves.

Relax, like.

So...?

So?

- So where have youse two been?

- Around. - Yeah.

- Right.

- Layin' low, like.

Low, like.

Was Janine there, Marian?

This morning?

She was.

Not that it's any of your business.

- Doin' very well for herself,

she is now. - Yeah?

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