Adulterers Page #2

In my bed?

All but the first time.

First time was a hotel.

Stop this, Sammy, please stop.

Woman, I am a fuse that

is fixing to blow.

You do not interrupt me again.

You were saying?

I don't remember.

Well, it was something about

you f***ing my wife in a hotel,

I do believe.

Yeah.

First time was in a hotel.

How'd ya'll meet?

Online.

Online, huh?

"Oh, don't worry, Sammy, baby.

I'm just reconnecting with old

friends from my high school."

You remember that

f***ing load of bullshit.

Hmm?

So, tell me, Punchy.

Did you go to

high school with my wife?

God damn it.

I blame myself for this sh*t.

No, Sammy, baby.

It ain't your fault.

I'm just, I'm messed up.

What happened next,

after you and my wife

became internet friends?

Oh, sh*t.

Are you married?

Yeah.

How long?

Ten years.

Ten years?

Yeah.

You got kids?

I got a little boy.

My wife got a girl on the way.

Well, congratulations, Punchy.

See, I reckon,

being married don't

mean sh*t anymore.

You see this little

band of silver here?

Just a god damn

cosmetic, ain't it?

(metal crunching)

(weeping)

Why don't you finish telling

me about you and Peaches.

We met up one night.

One thing led to another.

That was the first time.

How was it?

H... How do you mean?

I wanna know what it

was like f***ing my wife.

Sammy, please stop.

I can't take anymore.

I got news for you, baby.

We just getting warmed up.

We ain't even got to

the good part yet.

Continue.

It was okay.

Just okay?

Motherf***er, I know for

fact it's a whole hell of

a lot better than just okay.

Fine, it was great.

That what you want me to say?

She got some real good

p*ssy on her, don't she?

So, tell me.

Did you ass f*** her?

Come on, man.

Did you f*** my

wife in the ass?

Yes.

She like it?

I don't know,

you can ask your wife, I guess.

Yeah, you been

having yourself a

good ol' time with

my wife, ain't ya?

She suck your cock?

She do that little

thing with her tongue?

You know what I'm talking about.

Mm, oh, yeah, Peaches.

Oh, Peaches got a mouth

on her, don't she?

(murmuring)

Seems like your memory

ain't so good, Punchy.

You know what?

I might just help

you jog your memory.

Hey, there, baby girl.

Seems like your boyfriend

can't remember

whether or not

you give good head.

Why don't you get on over there?

Remind him.

(whimpers)

What?

F*** you, Sammy,

I ain't doing that.

Oh, yes you are.

No, Sammy.

You're just gonna have

to f***ing shoot me.

Well, then I guess

this is goodbye, then.

Peaches:
My god.

Sammy, you're really

gonna shoot me?

What you think?

Come on.

On your f***ing feet, Punchy.

(sobbing)

On your feet, Punchy!

This is f***ing sick, man!

Is that how you get off?

Look at the bright side.

At least you still breathing.

Both of you.

(crying)

Go ahead, there, sweetheart.

Just pop it on in your mouth.

Just pretend like I ain't here.

You know.

Like you did before.

(sobbing)

Yeah, you like that?

(phone ringing)

Baby, that's probably my boss.

I gotta get back

to the restaurant,

he ain't got nobody

covering my shift.

Well, you shoulda

thought about that before.

Keep at it!

Don't stop!

Get on in there!

Hello?

Yes, this is her husband.

Oh, she done decided that

she ain't coming

back to work today.

Oh, no, sir, we...

We kinda in the midst

of a family crisis.

Oh, no, no, no, no.

Everything's gonna be just fine.

Just fine.

Okay, bye.

Is it all coming back to

you now, motherf***er?

Hmm?

Yeah.

You made your f***ing point.

She can stop now.

There, there, Peaches.

Drink up.

You know, I read this

article the other day.

Now, they did this study at one

of them fancy universities.

Apparently they found out that

swallowing cum

makes women happy.

You happy now, darling?

You can thank me later.

(ticking)

A few nights back.

Can't sleep.

So I'm watching this

old show with De Niro.

Can't remember the name.

There's this part where he

picks this fellow up in a taxi.

Fella tells him to drive him to

this apartment

building and just park.

He don't get out.

Just keeps the meter running.

Fella then says that this

ain't his apartment building.

But the half-naked woman

standing in the window,

that's his wife.

Fella then says, "You

know who lives here?"

Niro don't answer.

Fella says,

"A n*gger lives here."

He then went on to talk about

how he's gonna kill his wife.

He said, "I'm gonna kill her.

I'm gonna kill her

with a 44. magnum pistol.

You know what a 44. magnum

would do to a woman's face?

It would f***ing destroy it,

just blow it right apart.

Now you know what a 44. magnum

would do to a woman's p*ssy?"

I gotta say, it's pretty

f***ing disturbing.

It got me to thinking, though.

What would I do?

I mean,

I got me a pretty

powerful gun, too.

I ain't imagine I'd be

answering that question so soon.

Now, you know I ain't never

raised my hand to no woman.

This situation you got me in,

it's taking everything to

keep me from squeezing

this trigger.

(gun rattles)

Ya'll have no idea how bad

I wanna watch ya'll bleed.

But you don't have to, baby.

We can work through this, okay?

I messed up real bad.

But I love you.

Cross my heart, I do.

I believe you

still love me, too.

God, Ash, I wanna believe that

I ain't got it in me

to kill a motherf***er.

I really do.

The way I'm feeling right now?

I'm damn near

capable of anything.

Taxi Driver.

What'd you say?

That's the name of that

movie you talking about.

Taxi Driver.

Who the f*** are you?

- My name's...

- Shut the f*** up!

Black American Express card.

Sh*t.

Platinum MasterCards.

Damien Dexter Jackson.

Sh*t must be nice.

I ain't never been able to

qualify for no platinum nothin'.

Let's see what else we

can find out about the man

that's been f***ing my wife

for six f***ing weeks.

God damn, Punchy.

This a whole lotta

walking around cash, huh?

Ooh, ooh.

You a drug dealer or something?

Hmm?

You a f***ing drug dealer,

motherf***er?

Of course not.

Motherf***er, are you

paying my wife for sex?

No, I'm not,

that's ridiculous, man.

- Ashley:
Wait, wait...

- God damn it, Ashley!

Wait, wait, wait, baby,

it's, let me explain...

Is he paying you for sex?

No, it ain't like that.

It's a loan, okay?

A loan for what?

Baby, you know

how you're always

going on about

wanting a new guitar?

Well, they were having this

huge sale at Old Timers,

and I was fixing to get you

a new one as an

anniversary present, okay?

But I was just a

little short, and so,

you know, I just wanted to

do something to make you happy.

But I ain't never borrowed

money from him before.

I pl...

I planned to pay him back.

How you gonna pay him back?

With his dick in your mouth?

I know you're real angry now,

but you ain't gotta

be so god damn mean.

I got a raise coming soon.

I'm gonna pay him back.

I just wanted to do something

real nice for you, Sammy.

Don't you f***ing move!

(breathing heavily)

F***, Ashley,

f*** the god damn guitar!

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