Airplane II: The Sequel

FADE IN:

EXT. JUNGLE - DAY

A machete slashes INTO FRAME. An American in battered

fedora and leather jacket, accompanied by two gunbearers,

hacks his way through dense bush. We see him from the back

only. He hacks an opening, bats fly out AT CAMERA and the

bushes part, revealing huge overgrown stone letters -- the

Mayan ruin look -- that spell "AIRPLANE II."

EXT. GANTRY - NIGHT

The Jupiter shuttle stands ready to fly.

SUPER:
HOUSTON, 2002

INT. MISSION CONTROL ROOM - STOCK FOOTAGE

of Houston Control with appropriate jargon V.O.

INT. TERMINAL - WIDE ANGLE STOCK SHOT

of a crowded modern terminal.

P.A.

All lunar departures, please proceed to

concourse lounge 'B.'

EXT. TERMINAL - STOCK FOOTAGE - NIGHT

of heavy traffic at LAX.

ANGLE ON TERMINAL DOORS

A number of men in futuristic-looking mining outfits,

carrying futuristic gear, unload a truck with a corporate

logo that reads:
TRX DEEP SPACE RESOURCE MANAGEMENT.

P.A.

Attention, all Pulsar Four mining

personnel.

The miners look up.

P.A.

Please report to the Resource Expeditions

office, level seven.

Two miners head to terminal doors and pass FOUR NUNS, who

bid farewell to FATHER O'FLANAGAN. O'Flanagan shakes the

hands of the first three elderly nuns, then grabs the last

young gorgeous nun and kisses her passionately.

OLDER NUN:

No tongues, Father.

INT. CONTROL ROOM

A group tour moves through the room behind controllers.

GUIDE:

All lunar shuttle landings are handled by

these computers and simulated on these

video units.

CONTROLLER 1

(at computer screen)

You're programmed on R-two-niner and

locked, Lunar eight six. Over.

INT. LUNAR SHUTTLE COCKPIT - NIGHT

Three crew members watch the lit landing strip as their

shuttle approaches.

CAPTAIN:

(to co-pilot)

It's out of our hands now, gentlemen.

They smile.

INT. MISSION CONTROL

The CONTROLLER moves away from his video unit. A kid from

the tour who has lagged behind hits a switch. The screen

turns into a video game with SFX. He flips knobs.

INT. LUNAR SHUTTLE

The crew are tossed from side to side and try to regain

control of the ship.

EXT. NIGHT SKY

The Lunar shuttle careens towards the terminal, out of

control.

INT. CONTROL ROOM

The kid is still playing like mad. A flash appears on the

screen. SFX VIDEO GAME EXPLOSION and a corresponding

EXPLOSION from outside. SIRENS WAIL. CONTROLLERS run

around. The kid is oblivious and walks away.

EXT. TERMINAL - NIGHT

BUD KRUGER, head of the space center, and the COMMISSIONER

get out of a limo under a sign that reads, "MERCURY

SHUTTLE." They walk and talk.

KRUGER:

Commissioner, we both know the Mercury

shuttle needs another month of pre-launch

testing.

COMMISSIONER:

Forget it. The boys on the board want

that shuttle to go on schedule.

CUT TO:

INT. TERMINAL

Kruger and the Commissioner go up escalator.

KRUGER:

And what do the boys on the board know

about safety, Commissioner? Let me talk

to them.

COMMISSIONER:

Bud, get wise to the political realities.

The boys on the board are under a lot of

pressure from the boys downtown.

CUT TO:

INT. TERMINAL - SECOND LEVEL

Kruger gets a pack of cigarettes from a machine.

Commissioner buys a newspaper.

KRUGER:

And I'll be the one they'll hang if

there's a screw-up.

CUT TO:

INT. TERMINAL - SHOESHINE STAND

Kruger and Commissioner get shoes shined. A MAN next to

them in white shoes reads paper with headline -- "SOLAR

PLANT MELTDOWN, 500 WORKERS SERIOUSLY TANNED" -- and doesn't

notice his shoes are getting black polish.

COMMISSIONER:

Listen, Bud, the boys downtown are under

heavy fire from the boys in Washington.

That's why they're putting pressure on the

boys on the board.

CUT TO:

INT. TERMINAL

Kruger and Commissioner head down escalator.

KRUGER:

Well, you tell the boys on the board to

tell the boys downtown to let the boys in

Washington know that the press has been

nosing around my people in the front

office.

CUT TO:

EXT. TERMINAL

Kruger and Commissioner head to their limo.

COMMISSIONER:

You handle your front office people, I'll

handle the press and leave the boys in

Washington to the boys downtown and the

boys downtown to the boys on the board.

KRUGER:

Commissioner.

They stop and look at each other.

COMMISSIONER:

What?

KRUGER:

I just wish it was that simple.

MUSIC:
DRAMATIC STING

They get back in their limo and drive off.

INT. MISSION CONTROL

CONTROLLER:

(over P.A.)

This is Mercury One control. We have

condition green. Mark launch 'T' minus

two hours and counting. I repeat, we have

condition green.

ANGLE ON LESLIE NEILSON - DOCTOR RUMACK

Dressed as a doctor and looking in a Controller's mouth.

The Controller's face is bright green.

RUMACK:

This condition isn't as bad as it could be

if it were a lot worse. Take these pills.

(hands him pills and water)

Here's some water.

CONTROLLER:

What is it, doctor?

RUMACK:

Two parts oxygen, one part hydrogen.

It'll make the pills go down easier.

EXT. GANTRY - CLOSEUP OF SHUTTLE - NIGHT

MUSIC:
BIG SPACE THEME

WIDE ANGLE LENS PANS the under-belly past the nose as if the

viewer bent his head back as far as he could, until... the

CAMERA crashes to the ground as if it has fallen off the

tripod.

MUSIC:
CRASHES TO A STOP

ANGLE ON SIDE OF SHIP

MUSIC:
BIG SPACE THEME STARTS FROM TOP AGAIN

PAN workers on scaffolding who check gauges on exterior of

ship. PAN to panel that reads, "SOLID FUEL CHUTE" -- a

sweaty muscular worker in undershirt opens the panel, flames

shoot out. LOOSEN to reveal another sweaty worker in

undershirt shoveling coal into the chute. PAN to other

workers checking more gauges. SUDDENLY a PANEL EXPLODES.

Smoking, sparking wires pop out. A WORKER runs up with

walkie-talkie in hand.

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