All at Once Page #5

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has not traveled

across the pond.

I just don't want to be late

on my first day.

First day of what?

Janitor?

Is that what I look like?

Do I look like a janitor?

No, I'm teaching here

next semester.

Oh, well, we don't want you

to be late on your first day.

I'm Bridget, by the way.

James.

I will show you

where you need to be.

- That'd be very nice. Thanks.

- Sure, let's go.

So are you a student?

Oh. [LAUGHS] I wish.

Thank you, but, no,

theater department.

- Oh. Art department.

- No.

- Yeah.

- No.

- Yeah.

- No, they didn't tell you.

What? Tell me what?

Mrs. Morrison decided

not to retire.

That position

is no longer available.

- What?!

- I can't believe they didn't tell you.

What are you talking about?

I just moved my whole life

to this place!

- What are you talking about

- Calm down, calm down.

- I'm f***ing with you.

- That's not funny.

- I'm sorry.

- No, that's not funny.

I don't think you understand

that you nearly gave me

a heart attack.

We really need to work

on your sense of humor.

You are very uptight.

Maybe you need to work

on your jokes.

See, now that,

that's what I'm talking about.

- Yeah.

- Come on, we'll be late.

Drama people.

Five rules you must abide by.

"When you're on the clock,

you're on the beat,

and when you're on the beat,

APB"?

Awareness, performance, bravado.

- Are you serious?

- Dead serious.

And then the fifth one

is the most important one.

So make sure you remember it.

"Never, ever belittle, insult,

or voice any displeasure

outwardly

for the God of cinema himself,

Sir Sylvester Stallone."

- You kidding me?

- Yo, Adrian, I did it!

[Laughs]

What? It's

it's from Rocky.

Yeah, I know,

and it was terrible.

Well, you should see

my Adrian impression.

It's even worse.

You're really pretty

when you smile.

I have a boyfriend.

Y-yeah, no, I meant

So, tell me, how do you like

living here so far?

I love it.

It's like a new adventure.

Yeah, have you met

any new friends yet?

Uh-huh, Uncle Lou, Denny, Dino,

Aunt Tiff, and you, too.

Aw, your sweet.

I love you too, darling.

But I mean, you know,

friends your own age.

Not really.

Hmm, well, it's important

to have friends your own age.

Well, I don't really get along

with other kids

my age that well.

Mm-hmm.

Yeah, I understand.

But, you know, you might

give it a shot because,

who knows, you might find

a new best friend.

No, way.

Uncle Lou is my best friend.

You excited

to have a new teacher?

Super excited.

Yeah, I think

you're gonna like him.

I've known him forever.

He's a wonderful musician.

[PIANO FLOURISH PLAYING]

[BEETHOVEN'S

FUR ELISE PLAYING]

That was beautiful.

You are truly gifted.

Thank you.

Ready to try

something different?

Sure. Yeah.

Okay.

This is where we're going.

[PLAYS BLUES RIFF]

[SCATS ALONG TO TUNE]

Now, what I want you

to do now is just

Boom, boom, boom, boom,

boom, boom, boom, boom

Boom, boom, boom, boom,

boom, boom, boom, boom

Find it.

That's it.

You got it.

Yeah, yeah.

Okay. Okay, now let's pick it up

a little bit, huh?

Let's take it to

[SINGS NOTES FASTER]

[SCATS ALONG WITH NOTES]

Come on, come on.

Pick up a little bit.

[SCATS ALONG WITH NOTES]

Yeah, take it somewhere now.

Take it somewhere.

[SCATTING]

That's okay, it's okay.

You're doing fine.

Hey, little darling.

What's wrong?

We're not finished just yet.

I would like to call Ginny.

Is something the matter?

I'm wanna go home.

Why so sudden?

I don't feel well.

Oh, well,

if you don't feel well,

then by all means, but, uh

you're not leaving

because something else

is bothering you, are you?

I don't like that music.

I don't want to play it.

You ever play the blues before?

Then how you know

you don't like it?

You can't say you don't

like something

- till after you tried it.

- I just did.

Little darling,

almost catch the rabbit

don't make a stew.

You can't eat no rabbit

you almost caught.

I don't eat rabbit stew.

[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]

All right then.

Guess we better give Ginny

a holler.

[R&B MUSIC PLAYING]

[BOTH SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY]

So if he's not your dad,

who is he?

- It's a long story.

- We have all day.

Hey, Love Puppy,

and Dreamweaver, order 27 is up.

James is my father's best friend since

they were little. They both grow up here.

It ain't gonna walk itself to the

table, all right? [SPEAKS ITALIAN]

So why is he taking care

of you and your sister?

Because both

our parents are dead.

[DINO] Enough with the commiserating.

Get back to work.

No more flirty flirting,

you got it?

- Yeah.

- How'd they pass away?

Was it an accident?

They worked

in some financial offices

in the Twin Towers.

You mean on 9/11?

Oh, my God.

I'm so sorry.

- It's not like any of this was your fault.

- I'm sorry

- Did James work in one of the buildings, too?

- No.

He was an artist, a painter.

He had to give it up

when he started taking care

- of me and Grace.

- How old was he?

Like early 20s or something.

That's pretty hard-core.

I mean, like, one second,

you're this,

like, cool New York City artist,

and then the next,

you're Mr. Mom.

I mean, damn.

He must really love you guys

for him to give all that up.

We should probably

get back to work.

- Lou's gonna kill us.

- [LOU] Oh, my God!

I got two skeletons at table 27!

The rest of the restaurant's

dying of starvation!

Kindly hurry up!

Let's go!

[PEOPLE CHATTERING]

See you later, bye.

Another reason

why I don't drive.

Can never find my bloody keys.

Oh, always the last place

to look.

How was your first day?

It was a happy medium.

Yeah, that's all right.

Couldn't have been as bad

as my first day.

- Oh, yeah, why's that?

- I never actually made it here.

I crashed my car into a fence.

- Wow.

- Yeah.

Couldn't actually believe

there were white picket fences

here in America.

- You thought that was only in the movies?

- Yeah, it was very distracting.

My mind told me to take a left.

My heart told me to go right.

You Americans couldn't keep

the damn steering wheel

- on the right side, could you?

- Oh, well, what makes you Brits

- think it's the right side?

- Oh, very clever.

Thank you, been working

on my sense of humor all day.

God, you gonna ask me if I need

a ride home or what?

- Get in.

- Yes, sir.

I gonna make a pit stop, though.

[CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYS]

[ROBERT] When I was a young 'un

just about your age,

my mama and daddy

worked two jobs

to buy me my first piano.

A Chickering.

[LAUGHS]

Some of the sweetest sounds

I ever heard

came out of these

old wooden boxes.

I called her Jolene.

You got to name your piano,

little darling.

Treat her good

like it's her best friend.

They need love just like we do.

And they got souls, too.

My daddy was a musician, too.

He was out there on the road

most of the time,

but he took me along with him

from time to time when he could.

That man could pick up

any instrument,

any instrument,

and in a matter of hours,

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