Allez, Eddy!

In the beginning

God created the heaven and the earth,

the animals and the plants.

In five days.

And everything God created was perfect.

But Mum says that on the sixth day

God made a mistake.

Because that's when he created Man.

We've seen it.

Shitty pants!

- Turd face!

Stinky!

- Stay there. Turd face!

And to help the people

He had created with a defect,

God created the doctor.

That doctor told me

there's a wire missing

between my head and my bottom.

The two aren't connected...

and that's why I keep messing my pants.

But God forgot to tell the doctor

how to put my defect right.

So now I have to wait for a prescription

to be sent down from heaven.

It's best If I don't go out on my own

because no good will come of it.

Like in the case of Martje,

Sien The Horse Man's daughter.

Everyone admired Martje.

Until they discovered that

Martje had a huge lump on her stomach.

From then on

no one listened to Martje any more.

They just looked at her stomach

and laughed.

No one ever heard Martje, Sien

The Horse Man's daughter, sing again.

Because people don't like

children who are different.

People don't like

children who are different.

That's why it's best

not to go out without me.

Freddy?

- Yes?

D'you hear me?

- Yes, Mum.

...the 62nd Tour de France,

setting off from Charleroi.

This year Eddy Merckx hopes

to go down in history

by winning it for the sixth time

and beating the French record holder,

Jacques Anquetil,

who won the Tour de France five times.

Frenchman Bernard Thvenet

won the Dauphin.

Can Eddy Merckx stay ahead of him?

Will the Cannibal be able to

fend off Lucien Van Impe?

For the next three weeks we will

be treated to a fantastic race.

140 riders, 14 teams, 22 stages...

The first riders have completed

the 6 km prologue.

The young Italian,

Francesco Moser, is in the lead

but all eyes are on Eddy Merckx.

Can he, here in his own country...

Fien, Marleen, Briek!

Pull your socks up.

Your bow is untidy.

Briek, I can hear the drums!

- I'm coming, Mum.

Andre!

- Yeah, I'm coming.

The procession.

- Merckx is about to start the Tour.

You don't abandon Mary with impunity.

- Merckx neither.

You were created in the image of God,

not in the image of a cyclist.

Today Merckx is God.

- Andre Dermul, you should be ashamed.

There is only one God

and that's me.

Briek!

- Yes, Dad.

What's up?

- Come on, son. For goodness' sake.

I won't be gone long. OK?

CLOSED FOR MERCKX

Eddy Merckx who won last year,

beating Raymond Poulidor by 8 minutes.

Eddy Merckx who has won

more than 500 races.

Eddy Merckx, our...

One rider will start before him,

the one who came second last year...

The riders are at the start,

the official is counting down.

Five seconds. Three...

Two, one, go!

Excellent start by Merckx.

What power, what pedalling!

The beast has been released!

Merckx passes the flag for

the final kilometre. 800 metres to go.

600 metres.

Will Eddy Merckx do

what everyone is expecting him to do?

Another 100 metres.

50, 40, 30 metres.

Eddy Merckx has set another time record.

Eddy Merckx left them all behind.

Well done, Eddy Merckx.

Well done!

Merckx is unbeatable.

Come on, Eddy, you are our hero!

COME ON, EDD Y!

What was that?

I think it's for the supermarket.

- Supermarket?

Yes. They're going to sell

everything under one roof.

Meat, fish, vegetables, shoes.

All together in the same shop.

Where?

- Next to Achille's field.

Meat next to underwear.

Who's silly idea was that?

They're going to sell racing bikes too.

- Racing bikes?

No one will want to shop there.

I wouldn't mind seeing this big shop.

Just take a look.

It sounds fascinating.

Fascinating?

Go on back to your room,

you strange boy.

Or you'll get something fascinating

round your ears.

Go on.

Come on.

That's a good idea,

your bike up in the air, eh?

Why is that supermarket

such a bad thing?

Go to sleep now.

Eddy Merckx breaks away.

The others can't keep up.

No one is strong enough.

Aunt Marjet!

- Here they are.

Hello, sweethearts.

I've brought lots of presents.

Come and see what I've brought.

Come and see. Take it all out.

Take it with you.

Take it inside. I'm coming.

Look.

So many presents!

- From Aunt Marjet.

Pleased?

Put them on the table.

Hello, sister-in-law.

You're wearing such bright colours.

You've become a nun after all?

Your mum will be proud.

She always wanted a nun in the family.

Look who it is. My little brother.

Take your apron off, it's Sunday.

Hi, aunt.

- Briek. Don't get blood all over me.

Good morning to you too.

Freddy.

Where's my little man? There he is!

My precious boy.

Will you come up to my room later?

- Yes, I'll come up to your room.

Go on then. See you later.

- Yeah.

Where are...

Where are you, girls?

That's a lovely colour.

- Yes, that's true.

That's nice. That's it.

- But that's too long.

We haven't looked at this catalogue yet.

I want that one.

- Me too.

Thought so. Even Princess Astrid

hasn't got one like that.

And she's got more money than us.

Here, Marjet, that's for the dresses.

It's my present for

your silver wedding anniversary, Angel.

I can't...

- Put it away.

No, Marjet, no way.

We'll pay for it ourselves.

You need this money, little brother.

- I'll buy my kids' clothes myself.

She wants to give them a present.

They'll be delivered to my house

in two weeks.

Here, Marjet. Take it.

- Unwarranted pride.

It won't get you anywhere.

I'll get where I want to go and

I don't need to go anywhere else.

Here, put it away. Right.

So this twice, OK?

What's that?

Your bike is up in the air.

Do you cycle up there?

- Yes.

You must be as good as Eddy Merckx.

- I definitely am.

I know you are. Come here.

Here, I've brought you something too.

Molteni, it goes with your T-shirt.

And this. Open it.

What does it say?

- Freddy.

Here, let me put it on you.

Come here.

Wow, that looks smart!

Mum says the girls can come

and stay at your house.

Yes, they're coming for

their dresses for the party.

Can I come too?

- You have to come.

Can you ask Mum?

I'll ask her right away.

Spin round.

Keep spinning, keep spinning.

And then you...

Chest. Chest against chest.

And spin and spin and spin.

Honestly, Angel!

Phew, Angel.

Oh dear.

I feel almost euphoric,

like I've had an orgasm!

It must've been a long time since

you've had an orgasm then!

Listen to you!

Your husband is never home.

It's much easier with

a husband who's never home.

Marjet!

- It is.

Variety is the spice of life, Angel.

After all, we only live once.

Here, have a chocolate.

No. Honestly, Andre, you...

In the city everyone does

all their shopping at a supermarket.

I do too.

- We're not in the city here.

What?

- We're not in the city here.

Be glad a supermarket is coming,

it'll mean an end to all the hassle.

You should be ashamed of yourself!

The shop was your father's, your

grandfather's, your great-grandfather's.

Come on, Angel, smile for a change.

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