American Pastrol Page #7

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I don't believe it's a difficult

conclusion to reach, honey.

I don't think I'm the only

person who, seeing you here,

would come up with that idea.

You want to do penance,

but this is not penance.

Not even the state

would punish you like this.

- Daddy.

- No.

Look at what

you've done to yourself.

You could die if

you keep this up.

But only to be reborn.

Will you at least

take off that mask

while we're talking

so I can see you?

See me stutter, do you mean?

My stutter was only my way of

doing no violence to the air.

Well, maybe you would

have been better off

with your stutter if

you had to go this far.

Where have you been?

Did you come to Newark

to help me find you?

I got a ride and

here I was, you see?

Coincidence? That's all?

The world is not

a place on which

I have any influence

or wish to have any.

As to what constitutes a

coincidence, you and I, daddy.

Where have you been

all these years?

After Hamlins,

I went to Sheila's.

Sheila Smith, your therapist?

She kept me for a few days

and then she sent me on to

people in the underground.

She sent you to them?

Sheila?

Yes.

They took care of me.

But it wasn't safe

to stay anywhere.

In two months, I had 15 aliases

and moved every

four or five days.

I took a name from

a tombstone in a cemetery.

Merry.

One morning,

I received a phone call

that I was to go to

the greyhound station.

They gave me a ticket

to Chicago.

I would stay there for two

days and then travel to Oregon

where there would be sanctuary.

I was raped the night

I arrived in Chicago.

Oh, my god.

Held captive and

raped and robbed.

Come home with me, merry.

You go, daddy.

Leave you? You think

I could leave you?

After everything I've...

You must.

That's exactly what you must do.

Please go.

No. You're asking me

to do something impossible.

I've looked for you for so long.

I can't.

Come home.

Come home, merry.

Please go now, daddy.

Please go.

What's wrong, Swede?

You never told me.

You've seen her.

You've seen merry.

She came to your house.

Why did you let her go?

Answer me!

You knew.

It was on the news.

She blew up a building and

you hid her in your house?

When I heard,

I couldn't believe it.

But I was her therapist.

I couldn't betray her.

You did betray her!

You sent her to people, the

worst people in the world,

the ones who got her

to do what she did.

That's not true. Merry

believed in what she did.

No! A man died!

A good man. I'll never believe

that that's what she wanted.

They manipulated her.

They used her for their

crazy, f***ing politics.

You used her.

You're trying to make

this my responsibility.

You and your radical friends.

They don't believe in peace or

war or the Vietnamese people.

They just wanted to blow

a hole in the world.

The biggest hole they could

and everything that was good!

They don't care if

people get killed!

And you sent her right to them!

I sent her to where she'd be safe.

She couldn't stay here.

She was a troubled girl. Going

to prison was not what she...

You think she was troubled then?

Oh, my god, Sheila,

you haven't seen her now!

How she lives! Where she's been!

She was raped!

No, don't say that.

Listen, I'm telling you something!

Did you hear me?

- Stop it.

- She's been raped!

My daughter!

She's sick in her body,

sick in her mind!

Dawn says to get

the steaks going, Swede.

Right. Okay.

She wants me inside,

helping with the corn.

And it's going to be close,

and he is out at home plate.

He's out. It's a double play

with a tag from ray Fosse.

And here comes Mets manager, yogi

Berra, to argue with the ump.

Ah, I don't believe it.

God damn this team.

- I thought bill told you to put the...

I can't.

I need to talk to you.

I hope this is important.

Leaving the Orcutts

to your parents like this...

Look, have you seen where

bill and I moved the sunroom?

He was so wrong

about the western light.

It's about merry.

What about merry?

All this time, we've had

no idea where she is.

And we aren't going to.

If she'd wanted us to find her,

she would have told us how.

She hasn't wanted to.

We've had to accept that.

- Dawn... -We've had to

accept that and we have.

But just suppose...

Suppose what?

What?

Suppose that we knew

where she was.

Go on. What is it now?

Do you have a new lead?

Some hunch?

- Some information?

- More than that.

Why? Did someone call?

Some nut who saw her

at an airport in Phoenix

or at a f***ing hare Krishna meeting?

Is that what it is, Swede?

Will you listen?

I'm telling you something.

When are you going

to give up on her?

I can't.

I tried so hard, but I can't.

Our old life is gone, Swede.

It's dead.

This.

This is our only future.

Excuse me, we have guests.

Nixon.

Watergate. It's all I hear.

Day and night, he goes on...

Von Ehrlichman,

Von Haldeman, Von Nixon.

They're all mamzers.

I agree with you, Mr. Levov.

They should all go to jail.

And I'm a republican.

Good for you, Mrs. Orcutt.

Are you okay, son?

Sure I am, mom.

Oh, my boy.

Who could want a better son?

Jesse, don't you think

you've had enough, dear?

Can I get you something, dad?

No. Rest.

You don't look so great.

I'll get you another drink.

Not now.

Not now.

Seymour?

Don't say anything.

- Swede.

- No.

Why are apes here?

Why are kangaroos here?

Life is just

a short space of time

in which you are alive.

Merry.

I have to ask you something.

I have to ask you something

I promised I wouldn't ask,

but I must.

You can ask me anything.

Did you do it?

Do what, daddy?

Plant the bomb

in the post office.

Yes.

Who made you do it?

Lyndon Johnson.

No, who talked you into it?

How strongly you still crave the

idea of your innocent child.

Was it Rita?

Who's Rita?

Rita, the girl you sent, the

one who came to my office.

I never sent you anyone.

Was this just some kind of game you

were playing with me, the two of you?

I relinquish all cruelty,

I relinquish all control,

all influence over the world.

Do you? Do you?

Well, you have

influence over me, merry.

I renounce all attachments

whether little or much,

small or great,

living or lifeless.

Were there others?

Did others die?

Were you involved

in other bombings?

Two.

You built the bombs.

I built and planted the bombs.

Was anyone killed?

Yes.

Who?

People.

How many people?

Three.

I'm going in now.

Don't go away from me.

Don't go anywhere.

Daddy, how much

suffering do you want?

Who are you?

Where is my daughter?

My daughter did not

kill four people.

Say it isn't you.

Say it isn't you!

Look.

Merry.

Your ballet shoes,

your riding ribbons,

all your things.

My stuttering book.

Why have you

brought these things?

Does it mean that

you aren't coming back?

Because if it does,

maybe that's best.

Merry,

I'm your father.

I made you

and I found you.

And there's no way I can ever lose

you or you can ever lose me again.

Let me take you home.

I can't leave you here.

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