An Ideal Husband Page #7

- Oh, not now.

It's about that letter you wrote to me!

Do come round in the morning.

I can't talk now.

Lord Goring.

Miss Mabel, about this evening, I...

Congratulations.

I beg your pardon?

I gather you are to be congratulated.

Nothing I like more

than to be congratulated.

I find the pleasure immeasurably

increased by knowing what for.

Haven't you heard?

You're to be married. Your father says.

Does he?

Yes, he does.

Did he, by any chance, tell you to who?

No, but when we saw you

with that woman Mrs Cheeseley,...

-.. we naturally assumed...

- Oh, did we?

Yes, we did.

Well, the fact is your assumptions...

.. are presumptuous.

You see,...

.. I'm not sure...

.. that I've seen anything

I quite like the look of yet.

Oh, really?

Mmm, really.

In which case, I have something

vitally important to say to you.

Oh?

To look at a thing...

.. is quite different from seeing a thing.

And one does not see anything

until one sees its beauty.

Oh, really?

Yes... Really.

Oh, Mabel.

Do you have something

you wish to say to me, Lord Goring?

Um...

No, no, I don't think so.

Then I don't wish to hear it.

Goodnight.

I'm sure that nice Mr Trafford

will have something to say to me...

.. and I'm even surer...

I will be quite charmed to listen!

Damn!

It is a great nuisance.

I can't find anyone else to talk to...

.. and I'm so full of interesting information.

I feel like the latest edition

of something or other.

Well,...

.. after some consideration,...

.. there's so much to do

there's only one thing to be done.

There comes a time in every son's life

when he must indeed...

.. follow his father's advice.

I shall go to bed at once.

I do hope we see you in the near future,

Mrs Cheveley.

So do I, but I fear, Lady Markby,...

.. that for me the future

seems strangely uncertain.

And what of the present?

Well, as a very dear friend

once said to me,...

.. "To love oneself is the beginning

of a lifelong romance. "

Goodbye, dear Lady Markby.

London will be the lesser

for your leaving...

.. and sadly lacking in scandal.

Ah, my dear Lady Markby,

my personal favourite is shortly to unfold.

Consider it a parting gift.

Thank you, Mrs Cheveley.

May I see it?

Mmm.

So... that is what you were doing

with that woman Mrs Cheveley?

Mmm.

Oh.

Well, it certainly didn't look that way.

There's a great deal of difference

between looking and seeing,...

.. isn't there, Miss Mabel?

Oh, my dear Arthur,...

.. what a good friend you are to him.

To us.

But the truth is

we're not out of danger yet.

There's a rather popular saying

about frying pans and fires.

Only this time it is you and I

who are to be roasted.

Oh, no, Arthur, I couldn't.

I think it is better

he should know the exact truth.

So you want me to tell him... What?

That I intended a...

.. secret...

A secret rendezvous, yes.

With a single man?

You want me to tell him that?

It's scandalous!

It's also the truth!

In this case, it may be our best option.

- But I couldn't possibly tell him.

- Then may I do it?

Certainly not. And you must give me

your word that you never will.

You are wrong, Gertrude!

But I will give you my word.

That you will never tell me what,

Lord Goring?

Robert.

What does this mean?

Robert, I had meant to

give it to you last night...

Last night?

Yes, when Gertrude sent it over,...

.. but you left in such a hurry...

So this letter is intended for me?

Well, of cour...

Oh, my goodness, you didn't think...

You couldn't possibly think that...

The name,...

.. the address on the envelope is yours.

She knew that when you left here

you would come to me at once.

Well, it stands to reason, old man.

Come on!

It's true, Robert.

I delivered it myself.

You did?

You did? Um... you did.

Certainly.

As you will remember, Gertrude,

after my rehearsals, I called in for tea.

When you mentioned the letter,...

.. I remarked I was shortly

to meet Lord Goring...

.. as we had an appointment

to visit the exhibition...

.. at the Grosvenor which, apart from

two studies in grey by Whistler,...

.. was exceedingly forgettable.

And that's exactly what Lord Goring

proceeded to do. Namely forget it...

.. before he even saw it,

for he never appeared,...

.. a fact which I find most upsetting

on behalf of myself and Mr Whistler.

We're both deciding

whether or not to forgive him.

In the meantime, I delivered the letter

to your office this morning.

And, you know, the fact of the matter is...

.. I still haven't heard a word of apology!

Um...

Sorry.

I forgive you.

Thank you.

Is this true?

"When you left,...

.. my...

.. my life fell apart. "

"I need you after all. "

Your life fell apart, Gertrude?

Yes.

Y-You need me, Gertrude?

Y-Yes.

Why did you not say that you loved me?

Oh, because I love you!

I...

I do not care what punishment

or disgrace is in store for me!

This letter of yours... makes me feel

that nothing that the world can do...

.. can harm me now!

There is no disgrace in store for you

nor any public shame.

Oh, I...!

I-I don't understand!

We have much to thank him for, Robert.

When I finished my speech last night,...

.. I felt sure that my future was in ruins.

When you began it,

I wasn't so sure about my own.

I don't know how to thank you.

I'm sure I'll think of something.

In the meantime, I'd be grateful

for the return of my hand.

Oh.

Miss Mabel.

Miss Mabel.

Miss Mabel, wait!

I... er...

.. have something very particular

to say to you.

Is it a proposal?

Well,...

.. yes, it is.

It is?

Er, well, I think it is.

- Well, yes or no?

- Well...

- Actually, yes, I'm afraid it is.

- I am so glad.

- That makes the second one today.

- What?

- Oh dear, not...

- Tommy Trafford.

It is one of Tommy's days for proposing.

He proposes on Tuesdays and Thursdays

during the season.

- Ah, but today is Friday.

- I know.

Today is special.

You didn't accept him, did you?

I shall be in the conservatory

under the second palm tree on the right.

Second palm tree on the right?

The usual palm tree.

And then we'll see how you do.

Usual?

Well, sir, what are you doing here?

Wasting your time, as usual.

My dear father, when one pays a visit,...

.. it is for the purpose

of wasting other people's time.

- Why are you here?

- I've important news for Chiltern.

- A seat in the Cabinet!

- You well deserve it, too.

You have got what we want so much

in political life - high character,...

.. high moral tone, high principles.

Everything that you have not got, sir,

and never will have.

I...

.. cannot accept this offer,

Lord Caversham.

I have decided to decline it.

Decline it, sir?

It is my intention to retire at once

from public life.

Decline a seat in the Cabinet and retire?

I never heard such damned nonsense

in the course of my existence!

I beg your pardon. Will you prevent

your husband from making such a...

I think my husband is right.

I agree with him.

You agree?

- Good heavens!

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