Another Day in Paradise Page #2

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look at them, they are bones.

- Bones...

- Poor babies.

Let's get these guys

something to eat

before they just blow out

the window like f***ing leaves.

- What do you say?

- Fine.

They do look like death eaten

on a cracker, don't they?

We are going on a road trip

and we will stop to eat.

Because we have road trip boogaloo.

- Boogaloo.

- Road trip boogaloo.

Aye-yi yi-yi

Your grandmother swims

after troop ships.

Drive the car, Melvin.

Did you like this

tongue this morning?

- You guys on acid?

- How long is this tongue?

Is this a long tongue?

How about this one?

Can yours move faster?

- Oh my God.

- Is that moving fast?

Yeah.

- Oh come on, don't be rude.

- Hey look where you are going.

You know, I figure you need

concentration.

You got to be perfect.

You need a nice light touch

for this kind of sh*t.

If that current is broken for

even like one-tenth of a second,

it is all over.

That is why they call them

contact alarms.

See?

That wire is live.

How long do I

got to do this for, man?

All day, all night

if that's what it takes.

Hey, there is no room for error, kid.

You f*** up, the alarm goes off.

Voila, it is over.

- Perfect.

- Hey, Henry Higgins...

how goes the tutoring?

Not bad. The kid has talent.

Well you have been working

him for hours.

Why don't you give him a break?

Let's go shopping.

Yeah, maybe it is time

to take a little break.

What do you say?

Lead the way, Miss Doolittle.

Are you going to wear

your crook gloves out?

- No.

- Good.

Hey, not you, princess.

We got work to do.

- I want you back here at 170O.

- We'll be here.

Don't have too much fun, okay?

Kiss?

- Oh, you shocked me.

- I shock you every time.

Come on. Come on.

We're going to take

a little drive.

F***, I hate the suburbs.

This is the good sh*t.

Where are we going, Mel?

I'm taking you for a drive.

- I thought we were working?

- We are working.

You want to sit at the hotel

and play with alarms all afternoon.

Shut up and go for a drive.

Hey!

I would f***ing

drink her bath water!

Did you see that ass?

How about Sid, man,

she has got the big titties.

Three things you never f*** with:

You never f*** with

a man's money...

you never f*** with

a man's dope...

and you never f*** with

a man's p*ssy.

Sorry, man.

I never want to get old.

You know what Mel says?

He says that when

he turns sixty...

he is going to drive off a cliff.

You want a fix?

No, I never shoot.

I hate needles.

Well, give it a little time, my dear

and you will come to love needles.

So how did you two meet?

Who, me and Mel?

Oh, let's see.

He was selling dope to this

schmuck that I was living with.

And he kept trying to get me to go

out with him behind Charlie's back.

That was the name of the guy, Charlie.

- You want one of these?

- No thanks.

I'm addicted to these things.

So anyway, when Charlie

got busted

and I was on my own...

I finally said yes to Mel.

And the rest is ancient history.

Are you guys married?

Married, why?

Still, it would have been nice

to have a big beautiful wedding.

I guess.

My parents...

I haven't spoken to my parents

since they found out he's Jewish.

It is too bad...

because, he is the ideal man.

I mean, he is smart, he is rich,

he is funny.

And he is hung like a horse.

I'm a lucky girl.

You know the best way

to eat p*ssy?

The f***ing alphabet.

A, B, C, D.

- No way.

- Try a Z, X, Y, Z.

We're here.

- What the f*** is this?

- A clinic.

We are going to rip off

some doctor?

This no regular doctor.

He's the biggest speed doctor

in the mid-west.

- No way.

- Yeah, he's the distributor.

He orders from the manufacture

and he supplies his own clinics.

It goes right through

his pharmacy, right here.

As you can imagine, this guy

does a roaring cash business.

He does a bank drop every morning.

But he is open Saturdays.

So we hit him Saturday night

and we get two day's receipts.

- All right.

- All right.

We will keep some of the

Desoxins and liquid Meth, okay?

Dump the rest wholesale.

You get one third,

expenses come off the top.

Expenses, what expenses?

Living expenses Ace.

This is a f***ing

business here, okay?

- Holy sh*t!

- Damn.

I guess you weren't the only

one who went to school today.

Look at you, baby.

You look great.

Thank you.

God damn.

What is this?

I guess the store is closing

early or something?

No, we hardly did any damage.

Besides, we needed something

to wear tonight.

- Tonight?

- What is tonight?

We are going out, baby.

For a big night on the town.

He didn't tell you?

We're going out.

- Mel, what is going on?

- I guess Mel's treating tonight.

- How much did all this cost?

- A lot.

Yeah? How much is a lot?

- Come on, Mel.

- Okay.

- Really, did it cost a lot?

- Goodbye, girls.

Jimmy.

- Hey Mel!

- How you doing?

Long time no see.

Do you think you can get us

a booth tonight?

I just got to tell you Rose,

you look really beautiful.

Thank you, Sid.

You are a very lucky guy.

They are both lucky,

lucky they met us.

They got good food,

good booze. Good music.

Now you are living, Ace.

I don't know man,

this place is a little rough.

This f***ing place?

Hey, I was in a Blues Bar

in St. Louis.

A guy walks in carrying a severed head.

Walks up, sets it on the bar.

And says, give the b*tch a beer.

- That is a true story.

- No way!

I'm f***ing serious

as a heart attack.

That is a true story.

You live in the fast lane, Mel.

I do.

We're certainly glad to have

everyone here tonight.

Is everyone feeling all right?

Are you all feeling good?

Listen, I'm telling you true.

I got to have somebody

to scratch my back tonight.

If you want to hear

Clarence Carter scream,

you just have somebody

scratch my back.

In fact, what I think I'll do

is play a little song,

so you'll understand what I'm

talking about.

A little song called,

"I'm Looking for a Fox."

It goes something like this.

- Dance? No way.

- Come on, Mel.

I'm all alone and fancy free

But this ain't the way I want to be

Get your game up tight

We gonna have

a wing-ding-do tonight

I'm lookin' for a fox

Lookin' for a fox

Oooh

Tonight the sky's the limit

I've got my money,

and I'm gonna spend it

It's Saturday night

and I want to play

I wanna make love

till the break of day

I'm lookin' for a fox

Lookin' for a fox

Oooh

I've got a brand new

pin stripe suit of clothes

I've got a big, wide polka dot tie

I got cuff links

as big as jay bird eggs

Look at this...

shoes made out of alligator hide

I'm ripe and red

and and hot to trot

Girl you can get anything I've got

I've got the money

if you've got the time

All you've gotta do

is give me a sign

I'm lookin' for a fox

Lookin' for a fox

Oooh

I'm lookin' for a fox

I've got to have me a fox

I'm lookin' for a fox

Find me a fox.

I don't want you puking

on my new suit.

Come on.

- I love you, Mel.

- Yeah?

You saved my life.

I sure did kid, but let's just

stay focused on not puking.

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