Armageddon Page #12

bomb right now. Kill the uplink.

- This thing is gonna blow.

We gotta get it off the ship.

- Easy.

- Stand down, Sergeant.

- Shut this bomb down and let us

finish our job the right way.

l'm under orders to protect

a surface detonation.

l'm gonna give you three seconds

to shut this bomb down,

and then l'm gonna make you shoot me.

Hurry, Watsler.

For Christ's sake, hurry.

What happened?

Sir, the override--

lt's been overridden.

l've bought us a couple

of minutes, so get that radio

workin', okay? Hurry, hurry!

Bring me all the way up here just to

blow me and my friends up? ls that it?

- Listen--

- Shut up!

Shut up, Colonel.

l'm talking now.

lt could start again.

lt might've been a warning.

- Uh-oh.

- That's why you are gonna

dismantle this bomb.

All right. What'd we miss?

- Do it again.

- Go.

Keep tryin'.

Sir, l need you to cease and desist.

l need your terminal now.

- Oh, they're reactivating the bomb.

- Comin' back on-line, sir.

Oh, geez. Here we go again.

What're you doin' up here? And why

did you even bother to make the trip?

To do the right thing,

to see that it's done.

For God's sakes,

think about what you're doin'.

Why are you listenin' to someone

that's 100,000 miles away?

We're here.

Nobody down there can help us.

So if we don't get this job done,

then everybody's gone.

One minute.

l've been drillin' holes

in the Earth for 30 years.

And l have never, never missed

a depth that l have aimed for.

And by God, l am not gonna miss

this one. l will make 800 feet.

But l can't do it alone, Colonel.

l need your help.

You swear on your daughter's life,

on my family's...

that you can hit that mark?

l will make 800 feet.

l swear to God, l will.

Then let's turn this bomb off.

Steady. Steady.

Take it back. That's what you'll

have to do. Get 'em off backwards.

- Rainbow track? Under--

Under one? Under-- Okay.

- All of 'em. All of 'em. All of 'em!

- Okay. Okay. Are we free of static?

- Oh, do a good job. Do a good job.

- Steady. Steady.

- Good job. All right.

All right. All right.

- Go! Go! Go!

Red wire ''A.'' Ready? And-- Now.

Come on! Come on! Come on! Come on!

- Negative ''B.'' Ready, and now.

- Do a good job. Do a good job.

- Track flipped. Hots in.

- lt better be. Go.

Red or blue?

Wait--

Blue.

- Good job!

- You got it.

Oh, God, it sucks up here.

- Sir, the clock has stopped

at three seconds.

- What?

Have we lost

complete radio contact?

l got some magic happening.

We're bouncing off Russian and French

satellites. lt may have a faint signal.

Houston? Houston, do you copy?

Go ahead, Freedom.

Houston, you have a problem--

Problem.

See, l promised my little girl

that l'd be comin' home.

Now, l don't know what you

people are doin' down there...

but we got a hole

to dig up here.

Go, go, go, go! Come on.

We got work to do.

Okay, guys. All go, no quit.

How ya doin' down there? Good?

Okay, got the tranny.

We're back in business.

Hey, you guys should take a break

and come up and see this.

Wow. Got a great view

of the Earth from here.

Too bad we'll never

set foot on her again.

- Lev, do you see anything?

- No.

Well, keep goin'.

l'm not givin' up.

Hold up here, Bear.

- Oh, boy.

- This is great.

We just happen to run into

the Grand Canyon on the asteroid?

l told you, you took

a wrong way, a wrong road.

What-- What road? Do you see

any roads around here?

You know what? l do not have

much pleasure being near God's ear.

But you think this is

looking good, or what?

Lev, why don't you just do humanity

a favour and just shut the hell up?

Have you ever heard

of Evel Knievel?

No, l never saw Star Wars.

All right.

Doin' a good job.

- Give me a depth reading, Max.

- We're 150 feet, Harry.

Ride 'em, cowboy!

Yippee-kai-yo, kai-yay!

Get off the nuclear warhead.

l was doin' that guy

from that movie, you know...

Slim Pickens, where he rides it

all the way in-- the nuclear warhead.

- Now.

- Oh, you didn't see that one, huh?

We got 700 feet of hole

to dig, Rockhound.

All right. Just-- Just wanted to feel

the power between my legs, brother.

Hey, Sharp.

No nukes! No nukes!

No nukes!

You got any more bullets

in that gun, Sharp?

What did Watts tell you, Bear?

lf she kicked you in the balls,

you'd keep floating.

Yeah.

We turn the thrusters off, we jump

this thing, we float right over it.

Go over it again, Lev.

Throw the jet thrusters off

exactly when we jump.

- Okay.

- And then we're gonna put them on,

and we gonna go down nice and slow.

- That's it. That's it, baby. That's it.

- ls this gonna work?

- l don't know.

- Lev, you know what, just lie to me.

Let's say 50-50--

No. More like, uh--

like 70-30 or 80-20.

But you know what? lf it works, the two

of you gonna be heroes, just like me.

Screw it. We're jumpin'

over this canyon.

Just for the record,

this is a very bad idea!

- Wait for the edge now.

Wait till we get there. Wait--

- l'm waiting.

- Here we come. Now, not till we do it.

- Three...

- two, one!

- Here we go!

Off!

- Yes!

- lt's working!

- lt's working!

- Oh, my God!

- Yeah!

- l'm a genius! Wait a minute.

- Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

- We got some rocks!

- Go left! Go left!

- Lev! Lev, l can't do anything!

Turn!

Oh, okay, okay, we're

floating into outer space.

- Check main switch.

- Uh, this could be

a little bit of a problem.

- Thrusters on now!

- All right, turn 'em on.

- What's wrong?

- l-l don't know. The-The thrusters

not working. l hate this machine!

- l thought you had this planned!

What're we supposed to do?

- Be quiet! l must think!

- l'm stepping outside.

- You're-You're going outside?

l am the only certified astronaut,

and l'm saving your American ass!

Yes. You'll listen

to him. Right.

Hurry up, Lev, because we're

about a mile off the asteroid!

Just a second.

The fuel line is iced up.

- Yeah, l think maybe workin' now.

- No, Lev, it's not working!

l'm sorry, A.J.

l was way off the odds.

- We're gettin' higher, man.

- Look out! The rocks! Rocks are coming!

Hold on!

- Pull the thrusters!

- Lev, look out!

- We lost Lev.

- A.J.!

A.J., the thrusters!

Let's get Lev back!

Lev, hold on!

We're comin' in!

Thank You, Jesus. Thank You, Lord.

Thank You. Thank You,

thank You, thank You.

- Lev!

- Now l'm really a Russian hero!

- l told you!

- l know!

- l knew this would work!

-Good odds, you know?

-Come on, Lev. Get in here. We gotta go.

Rockhound, keep

on that transmission.

- Tranny looks good, Harry.

- All right. Take it outta there.

Lock it down, Chick.

Nice.

How come we didn't get

any training on this thing?

Whoa. Very cool. l could take out

this asteroid single-handedly.

Okay, boys, give it a rest.

l'll take it from here.

- Whoa!

- What the hell is that?

-lt's Rockhound.

-Whoa. This is so much fun, it's freaky.

Rockhound!

Whoa, watch your heads.

Sorry, Harry.

- Outta my way, boys!

- Rockhound!

Meet your maker, asteroid!

- What the hell's the matter

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