As Good as It Gets Page #4

Vincent's slack-jawed expression changes. He feels an

intellectual tingle to be having this conversation.

VINCENT:

I know exactly what you mean.

There's a joy in him at this moment -- a bit of purity.

SIMON:

Hold it.

Vincent does so -- hums a bit of "Satisfaction" to

celebrate.

INT. RESTAURANT - DAY

Carol and LESLIE, another waitress, are waiting for their

order at the cappuccino bar. Leslie is telling the story

of the traumatic audition which may have turned her life.

Carol is rapt.

As they pass Melvin she does not break stride, nor give

him notice. Though she is aware of him -- resentfully so

-- hard not to be since he is giving a moment to moment

commentary on her every action.

MELVIN:

Clippity clop -- clippity clop --

she has to pretend she doesn't

hear me. Listening to the story

from the upset friend... now she

drops off the cappuccino and

smiles at the putzette who doesn't

even say, "Thank you." No, the

putzette wanted the whipped cream

so back she goes and now she has

to pass him again and it's getting

tougher to make believe.

CAROL:

(reluctant forgiveness)

Okay.

Melvin stops -- she passes behind him to deliver an

uncharacteristic rabbit punch.

CAROL:

What's with the plastic picnic

ware? Why not try ours... afraid

it isn't clean?

MELVIN:

I see the help -- judgement call.

CAROL:

Just give yourself a little pep

talk. "Must try other people's

clean silverware as part of the

fun of dining out."

MELVIN:

What's wrong with your son,

anyway?

CAROL:

What do you care?

Melvin just looks at her.

CAROL:

He's gotta fight to breathe.

His asthma can just shoot off the

charts -- he's allergic to dust

and this is New York and his

immune system bails on him when

there's trouble so an ear

infection... Is this bothering

you?

MELVIN:

(caught)

No.

CAROL:

An ear infection can send us to

the emergency room -- maybe five,

six times a month where I get

whatever nine-year-old they just

made a doctor. Nice chatting with

you.

MELVIN:

His name?

CAROL:

Spencer.

MELVIN:

Okay.

CAROL:

(quietly)

Spence.

She exits.

INT. SIMON'S APARTMENT - STUDIO - DAY (SEVERAL WEEKS LATER)

The greenhouse studio is a busy sanctuary, as Simon puts

the finishing touches on his painting of Vincent. A beat

and then a strange figure crosses between the CAMERA and

the scene -- gone before we can examine him further.

SIMON:

You can put on anything you want

now. I might be sort of done

here...

Vincent quickly and expertly picks a CD to meet his

immediate needs and puts it on -- dying a little at every

second of silence during the transition... then LOUD

MUSIC PLAYS... Vincent even GOOSING the VOLUME. Simon

does a take -- he gestures Vincent to take it down --

which Vincent does.

ANGLE - APARTMENT

where it is not clear that a robbery is in progress --

Vincent's two friends from the street sweeping all

objects into large sacks -- one of them, Doug, pauses

to look past the terrace to the studio.

DOUG:

Lucky Vinnie -- he's a painting.

INT. SIMON'S APARTMENT, STUDIO - DAY

MUSIC PLAYS -- Simon cleaning up his stuff.

VINCENT:

So you're practically finished,

huh?

SIMON:

Yes... well, there's one more

stage -- trying to figure out if

it's any good.

Simon sneaks a look at the canvas from another

perspective... he focuses -- then the smallest shy nod

of self-approval -- he's finished. Vincent is desperate

to distract.

CLOSE ON dog as Verdell awakens, stretches and pricks his

ears. He moves quickly to the closed door and starts to

frantically scratch, attracting Simon's attention.

As Simon keeps walking... Vincent shoots over to the

canvas.

VINCENT:

Wait -- I want to see the

painting.

SIMON:

Just a second -- he has to go.

VINCENT:

Please!! NO!!!

Simon opens the door and Verdell shoots out like a

bullet. Vincent pauses before the painting and is thrown

to see his humanity captured -- to be "immortalized."

INT. SIMON'S APARTMENT - LIVING ROOM - DAY

Doug and Evan are nearly to the front door as VERDELL

stops them with a vicious GROWL and BARK.

Simon is distracted -- looking down at his pet so that he

continues to walk toward Doug and Evan, not noticing

them -- Vincent, terribly afraid, appears behind Simon.

SIMON:

(to Vincent)

What's the matter, sweetheart?

He instantly stops. Shocked. Frozen. His eyes on the

stranger, Doug, looking at him. Now Vincent comes in.

Doug greets him.

DOUG:

Yo.

Simon turns to Vincent.

SIMON:

Why are you doing this?

VINCENT:

No. No. No. Hey, that painting

in there... I just want to tell

you...

Now Evan appears holding a brass hat rack.

EVAN:

(to Vincent)

What are you doing? Cruising him?

And he uses the hat rack first as a spear, then as a

club, as the brief savage attack begins.

ON VERDELL:

as he starts to go toward Simon and then scurries back in

fear. The three attackers leave. Now silence. A single

BARK from VERDELL.

INT. APARTMENT BUILDING (NEW YORK) - HALLWAY - DUSK

A mass of OFFICIAL PEOPLE clutter the hall as a gurney is

whisked down to the elevator. It's impossible to tell if

Simon is awake or dead. Melvin is standing against the

wall near his door a cop, RAY, interviewing him.

RAY:

Okay. So you call 911 and don't

leave your name -- even a dumb

geezer should know that emergency

automatically pulls up your name.

How come you make a mistake like

that?

MELVIN:

How come you're pretending to do

cop work -- 'cause I don't think

you could find your ass if you

were spotted the hole.

RAY:

(stunned)

What?

MELVIN:

Just move on. No one here killed

him.

RAY:

Oh, is he dead?

MELVIN:

Ask him.

RAY:

We will if we can and if we can't,

we'll come back and ask you again

and again.

INT. APARTMENT BUILDING (NEW YORK) - HALLWAY -

ANOTHER ANGLE - NIGHT

Frank standing upset, anxious, holding a dog bowl, a

leash and VERDELL, who is more upset making pathetic

little CRYING SOUNDS.

As we FOCUS BRIEFLY ON Verdell... Frank is talking to the

Sweet-Faced Woman.

SWEET-FACED WOMAN

I've been praying for him since I

heard.

FRANK:

So I've got to get to the

hospital. If you could take the

dog just for tonight.

SWEET-FACED WOMAN

Oh, Lord -- I've got all these

antique knick-knacks... Or else

I'd be glad...

FRANK:

Maybe if you kept locked in

the bathroom. No? Okay. Thanks.

(as he turns away and she

closes the door he adds)

Old b*tch... Damn dog.

A short laugh makes us realize that Melvin has witnessed

and enjoyed Frank's hostile mutterings...

VERDELL starts WHIMPERING as a pissed Frank approaches

his mugger:

FRANK:

You're taking him... yes... you're

taking him -- this will clear the

books. One night. You want to

say "no" to me? Try... because

I've never felt as nuts as I do

right this second. I almost want

you to try saying "no."

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