Bad Boys II Page #9

-Eyeball set.

-Dex, high ground.

-Rooftop set.

-Fanuti, light your crack pipe.

-Got you.

Lockman, you buzzing?

We're up, baby.

-Hello, anybody home?!

-We got a stiff to deliver!

-What's going on here, man?

-We got a stiff to deliver.

-Nobody told me about any stiff.

-The guy's in the van now. He's fresh.

No deliveries tonight.

They told us to come right over

to the place. This is the place.

-We must bring him in here. l'm sorry.

-No one in.

-You get that body to the morgue yet?

-Morgue?

You said to get it to

the Spanish Palms Mortuary.

No, you dumb Latin f***.

What you smoking

in that crack pipe?

Who you calling a Latin f***, man?

Check.

There's burnt people down here, Mike.

Oh, f***.

Damn, somebody's teeth.

Now that we're here, you need

to sign some paperwork...

...because the man is very contagious.

His contagiousness could touch you.

You guys have a nice evening.

Good night.

Might you see us inside

for some hot cocoa?

Cam one, l got a good signal.

Cam two, l got a good signal.

-Damn!

-Stop it. Do not do that tonight.

-You don't smell that?

-Oh, yeah, l smell it.

-lt stinks.

-Stop!

l'm gonna have some Pepto.

-This dude hasn't been embalmed yet.

-What you talking about?

They stick a tube down your throat

and just suck out all the gunk and bile.

Because what happens is, your body'll

get gaseous and you'll decompose.

Don't want that to happen

before your family see you.

-l don't need to know that now.

-They sew your mouth closed.

They got to get it all out because

a lot of times dead people'll fart.

That sh*t'll clear a funeral home out.

-How do you know all that?

-Learning Channel. That sh*t got me.

Oh, sh*t.

You're not even gonna

warm up to it?

Hey! Do some cop work.

-He's a human being.

-Check the casket.

Why don't you check his spine

while you're in there.

l'm retching.

Mike!

-What?

-Have some dignity.

-l ain't doing nothing.

-Cover her titties up.

Like, what am l gonna do

with these big-ass dead titties?

But you're looking, though.

There's-- Something's wrong

with your brain.

Just cover the titties.

Goddamn!

Damn. This nicer than some cribs.

She's going to Cuba.

Who's top cop now? Huh?

That's what l'm talking about. See?

There you go.

That's it right there. Take a picture

of the money, then check this body.

Nah, l'm gonna count these.

You know?

Check the body.

l'm gonna check the body, Mike.

l'm not rushing into it, that's all.

This one's going to a mortuary

in L.A.

l'm gonna check this one.

That's that bullshit

that l be talking about.

Mike, the motherfucking head fell off.

Come here.

l'm back in the game.

Think l got something.

Feels like a bag.

Sh*t, it's his kidney.

l smell dead people.

Drugs and money.

We got him, baby.

This dude is loaded.

Bet he thinks he's a damn genius,

transporting them in dead bodies.

Let's get this body.

Mike, you got company, man.

Somebody's coming. Hide!

Give me the X. Give me the X.

You gotta stall them.

Hide! Hide! Hide!

Sh*t!

Punk kids do this? Go check it out.

Hide!

Marcus! Why would you--?

That's just not smart, man.

You tell Theresa, l'll kill you.

Bimbo's next.

Oh, God. Not that. Not the bimbo.

Let's hurry this sh*t up.

Sh*t.

We got a big problem.

We got a big problem.

Drive that ambulance

into the building right now.

-Crash it into the building!

-No. Not me, baby.

l got too many crashes on my file.

You do it.

No. You're kidding. l got red-flagged

last month for the thing.

You know how much the city paid.

l can't have another ding on my file.

Mike, my man, we want to help

you out here, you know...

...but we got a couple of administration

problems over here, you know?

So how about we give sirens

and some flashing lights?

Make a racket. How's that?

Negative! Negative!

Crash that ambulance

into the building right now!

We want to help the team out

and everything, but....

But I'm not getting suspended

for this.

Okay, l plan on whupping y'all

asses the second l get out of here.

-Crash into the building right now!

-Screw it.

Just the price of cop business.

Now, get her on the table.

Oh, my God.

Jeez! What the hell!

l'm so-- l'm so--

That's tragic, man.

Go, go, go. Back door's clear.

Go! Go!

Get up, Marcus!

The gas got stuck. l didn't mean to.

Oh, man.

Supple leather, you know.

You ever rub your leather?

You know, like, just rub it.

See how good it feels.

What does love mean to you, Mike?

Don't worry about me and my love.

Look, l got plenty of love in my life.

Like a woman's butt.

-Don't do that.

-Whoa, whoa, whoa. Mike.

Let's just concentrate

and get this warrant.

l need to express right now.

l want you to know, if this is

our last job, l really appreciate you.

Okay?

No, this is not gay sh*t.

This is man sh*t.

You know what l mean?

And you a beautiful man.

You know?

And when you let the beautiful side--

-What?

-Look at your pupils.

How am l look at my pupil?

What, l'm--

Yo, what are you taking?

Did you take some of that X?

-Hey, look, give me a hug.

-Hey, get off. Listen, listen. Listen!

We need this warrant. Do not

f*** this up. Pull yourself together.

Evening, captain.

Hello...

...''capteeon.''

So how do you two plan to f*** up

my evening tonight?

Well, captain, believe me,

we would not be here...

...if it weren't seriously,

utterly important.

Get in here.

Get off me!

Cap, this is beautiful.

Have such a warm feel,

you know.

Sort of like a ''ving shwa.''

What's it, Mike?

-lt was a V, like a ''von schwo.''

-Why don't you have a seat?

-Or ''ven wangs'' or--

-Feng shui.

''Von sway.''

You have a ''von sway'' home.

Make yourself at home.

All right, captain, l know you said

that Johnny Tapia was hands--

-Oh, no! No!

-Look, captain, we got him. lt's a wrap.

Look, we messed up today,

but we got him. Please just look.

-How do l move it?

-Here, you flip through the pictures.

You can flip--

You can flip through picture--

This is horrible.

-Take the picture.

-You can look really close.

Listen, we got everything

that we need to take this dude.

Oh, God.

They're taking the organs out.

Right there you can-- You can--

Yeah. lf you look there....

Oh, gosh.

This is good. That's horrible.

Look at this.

Everybody just needs to relax.

Whoosah. Whoosah. Whoosah.

What are you doing? Marcus,

it's 2 a.m. Get your hands off me.

Remember we said we

were gonna call Vargas and Reyes?

-No, l don't--

-Call Vargas!

Tell him the thing

we said to tell him.

-What thing?

-Tell him we said-- About yesterday.

And tell him about the thing.

So, captain, listen,

we've also got videotape.

Yesterday, we f***ed up bad.

But we got him now.

Oh, sh*t.

-What?

-No, a lot of times with these--

Oh, sh*t!

-What? Did l erase it?

-No. We got video.

-We got f***ing....

-Oh. Let me see.

Oh, sh*t.

He's shipping the drugs around

the country in bodies.

We found coffins of cash,

tagged for Cuba.

And you think Tapia's about

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