Bad Company Page #3

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Pa made up this deal.

When we got to a town,

he'd find some idiot farmer

and then sell him our n*gger.

Then come nightfall, Pa and me would

sneak out and steal him back again.

Before they missed him, we'd be on

to the next town. My pa thunk it up.

- Pretty smart, ain't it?

- How come you still ain't doing it?

Well, one day,

OI' Dan shot my pa dead.

- He did?

- Yep.

- Just like that?

- Somehow he got the drop on Pa.

Do I have to hear about some n*gger?

Tell us who was yelling at Jane.

Well, tell me later, Boog.

I'd like to hear it.

You're a gentleman.

Not like Jake Rumsey,

who'd rather hear some dumb

horseshit about drawing rooms...

- If you knew my pa, you'd...

- Boog!

"Mister Rochester, however,

was no longer in his chair.

"In haste, I passed quickly through

the room in my anxiety to find him,

"but he was neither in his chambers

nor in the hall.

"I had to consider whether my duty

lay in remaining with the child..."

Believe me, boys, the worst idea

in the world is to go west.

- Come on, now.

- I ain't lying, son.

We tried farming. The first year,

a twister wiped us out.

The next year, it was the cattlemen,

then just pure de-rotten soil.

Nobody got no money.

Even if you do,

there ain't a thing worth havin'.

Rains so damn much,

it'll give you the chilblains.

Dry spell come along,

you choke on the dust...

if a bushwhacker

don't take your last damn dollar.

- I mean it. Turn around and go back.

- Amen.

Listen, farming's always rough.

That ain't our line.

'Sides, you struck out too late in

your years. We're boys in our prime.

You know, seein' as you boys ain't

gonna hit a town for quite a while...

you must be getting kinda itchy,

you get me?

- What do you mean?

- Well, now...

You take Min here.

She's a gal and a half.

I mean, it's not exactly virgin

territory, if you know what I mean.

I'll make a bargain, seein' as

you're playin' it close to the vest.

$10 for all of you.

It's your last chance for poontang.

Make that $8 and you're on, honey.

Zeb?

Well, you boys drive a hard bargain,

but $8 it is.

Well, I ain't interested.

- What?!

- Oh, I just...

Well, nothin' to get riled about.

I just ain't interested.

You dumb sh*t.

You're turnin' this down?!

- Yeah, I am.

- God Almighty!

- He's saving it for his wedding day!

- Well, what if I am, damn it?

- Aw, honey, don't do that.

- Ma'am, I ain't discussing it.

Leave off him,

you goddamn sons of b*tches.

Why you want to waste our money?

We got little enough as it is!

- In your case, that's the truth.

- Go to hell!

C'mon, Drew. Let them kill

themselves for all we care.

- Loney, Jim Bob?

- Just show us where to line up.

How do we know

we ain't buying no pig in a poke?

Min...

Lord.

Oh, Jesus.

- Simms, you in?

- Yeah, sure.

But... Well, you ain't got

no disease, have you?

- That's a hell of a thing to say.

- I just...

They say your brain rots away.

You tryin' to spoil it for us?

Where to, honey?

- That grass looks real soft.

- Well, you name it. I'm first.

Watch your step, now.

Drew,

you're a disappointment to me, boy.

Come on, you sweet thing.

I told you we'd live off the land!

I get seconds.

I get seconds.

It looks like

you're getting hind tit, Simms.

That's all right.

Well, you sure you're clean,

ain't you?

I know I am, hon,

but I can't vouch for your friends.

That was a dinger!

- You done already?

- I don't waste time.

After that, I expect

she's too tuckered out for you boys.

October 20th 1863.

I have resisted temptation,

but how hard it was.

How I long to be in the bosom

of my beloved family.

I think that I should find somebody

to toil with me

through life's weary way.

Unless I do, I will settle

for some poor means

of bestowing my affections

on some poor, pitiful creature,

the same as my good companions

did this afternoon.

What you getting up for?

It's another hour till your turn.

I can't sleep.

I was dreaming about ol' Min.

Hmm? About who?

About the gal this afternoon.

Oh.

She won't forget

that reaming I gave her.

Yeah, I suppose so.

Say, I figure we need an early start

to make up for lost time.

Yeah, I still can't figure out

why you took a passer on that.

Jake, you got something to say?

Damn it, you're looking sideways

at us since ol' Min.

What? No, I wasn't.

See, I ain't got anything

against your doing that,

but I was brought up different.

- Well, don't you wanna do it?

- Well, yes. It's just that...

Well, I was raised to honour a woman.

- You understand that?

- No.

Well, where I come from,

there's good women.

They do it just the same

as the other kind.

Oh, you just don't get it.

All right, lookit.

I've promised to stay on the good

side of life. OK, Jake?

All right? That's the end of it.

You really do come

from good stock, don't you?

Here.

This is them.

Yeah, that's real nice.

Makes me wish I'd took a picture

for reminders.

Yeah...

I do miss my mom sometimes.

I think about her every once

in a while, how she's doing.

Hey, don't tell them

that I been jabbering on like this.

So... you plan on getting married

before you give it a try?

- Huh?

- Something like that.

To each his own,

if you've heard of that.

Yeah, I've heard of it.

Well, seeing as how you're up...

Yeah, I'll take over for you.

Go get some shut-eye.

Here. Take it.

- So you don't wake us up too soon.

- Right.

Well!

That's a charming picture, ain't it?

Are we gonna stand here

or are we gonna rob 'em?

On your feet!

- Get up!

- Oh, my Lord!

Come on, get up.

Very nice. That's what

I call a perfect waking-up job.

Nobody fainted. Nobody screamed.

I didn't think you could do it.

- We ain't got anything.

- Sure you ain't.

Good, Hobbs. Very threatening.

Now, we've all had our fun,

let's set to work.

Hold it.

That's mighty brave, Hobbs,

considering the gun's pointed at me.

- I'll shoot if I have to.

- Shut up, boy.

You're lucky you're still alive.

Now, which one of you was covering

this unruly mob of angered youth.

God damn, Jackson.

I wouldn't mind you being stupid

if you was good company.

C'mon, Jake.

Shoot the son of a b*tch.

Now, boy, let me give you

a little piece of advice.

If you're gonna pull a gun

on somebody...

which happens from time to time

in these parts...

you better fire it, because most men

ain't as patient as I am.

Ain't lost my touch yet.

Well, what are you waiting for?

Clean 'em out!

Here it is, almost lunchtime,

I ain't got change for breakfast yet.

You thought it was pretty funny what

that bastard said to me, didn't you?

This here's all I could find.

Two dollars and fourteen cents.

I'd like to find the son of a b*tch

that told me to go west.

Hey, there's beans and molasses

and jerky and a little bit o' coffee.

Well! You boys must've brought along

a cook from Paris, France.

Take it all. Come on, Jackson.

Goodbye, boys.

Just think of us as some terrible

nightmare that came and went.

By nightfall,

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