Ball of Fire Page #16

- This is as far as you drive, brother.

- No, no.

1330

01:
10:46,441 -- 01:10:49,308

But, Officer, this is a wedding party.

1331

01:
10:50,445 -- 01:10:51,912

A wedding party?

1332

01:
10:51,980 -- 01:10:54,141

- Are you the bridegroom?

- No, I am.

1333

01:
10:54,215 -- 01:10:56,410

- Is this the bride?

- Yes.

1334

01:
10:56,484 -- 01:10:57,883

- Pardon me.

- Officer, please.

1335

01:
10:57,953 -- 01:10:58,942

What is it?

1336

01:
10:59,020 -- 01:11:02,251

It's good luck to touch a bride,

and I got a promotion coming up.

1337

01:
11:02,324 -- 01:11:05,851

Well, could you reciprocate

by letting us proceed?

1338

01:
11:05,927 -- 01:11:07,417

- Yes, we'll drive very carefully.

- Yes.

1339

01:
11:07,495 -- 01:11:10,225

Postponing a wedding

is bad luck, you know, Officer.

1340

01:
11:10,298 -- 01:11:12,232

That's right.

Well, what are you waiting for?

1341

01:
11:12,300 -- 01:11:13,892

- Get going.

- Okay.

1342

01:
11:13,969 -- 01:11:15,596

A very nice gentleman.

1343

01:
11:19,107 -- 01:11:21,940

All that nonsense with my driving license.

1344

01:
11:23,144 -- 01:11:26,477

With that license I once drove

President Theodore Roosevelt.

1345

01:
11:26,548 -- 01:11:28,778

And he pronounced my driving bully.

1346

01:
11:28,850 -- 01:11:29,874

(HORN HONKING)

1347

01:
11:29,951 -- 01:11:32,351

- He said that...

- Look out! Look out!

1348

01:
11:36,257 -- 01:11:38,020

Look out, look out!

1349

01:
11:39,361 -- 01:11:40,350

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

1350

01:
11:40,628 -- 01:11:41,925

(PHONE RINGING)

1351

01:
11:46,101 -- 01:11:47,500

(BANGING ON DOOR)

1352

01:
11:56,644 -- 01:11:58,407

Help! Help!

1353

01:
11:59,981 -- 01:12:03,417

Police! Police! Help! Help!

1354

01:
12:04,052 -- 01:12:06,145

How's that, operator? No answer.

1355

01:
12:06,221 -- 01:12:07,848

- Jam it.

- Jam it.

1356

01:
12:08,356 -- 01:12:10,085

(PHONE RINGING)

1357

01:
12:11,593 -- 01:12:12,582

Huh?

1358

01:
12:13,294 -- 01:12:16,559

All right, I didn't mean to say it, I'm sorry.

1359

01:
12:16,631 -- 01:12:18,826

Hey, wait a minute,

there's a car driving up now.

1360

01:
12:18,900 -- 01:12:19,889

(PHONE RINGING)

1361

01:
12:21,836 -- 01:12:24,202

Listen, sister, I said I was sorry.

What do you want me to do?

1362

01:
12:24,272 -- 01:12:26,570

Send you a bouquet of...

1363

01:
12:26,641 -- 01:12:29,371

It's you, wait a minute.

Hey, it's Sugarpuss.

1364

01:
12:31,679 -- 01:12:33,943

Sugie, say,

what the sweet Judas gives out?

1365

01:
12:34,015 -- 01:12:35,004

Where are you?

1366

01:
12:35,083 -- 01:12:38,917

We're not down here to enjoy ourselves.

This is a wedding.

1367

01:
12:38,987 -- 01:12:41,785

A what? They had an accident.

1368

01:
12:42,490 -- 01:12:47,484

Nothing serious.

No, it just shook the old boys up a little.

1369

01:
12:48,163 -- 01:12:50,529

I couldn't get to a phone before.

1370

01:
12:50,598 -- 01:12:52,828

I don't know,

some little hotel near Kingston.

1371

01:
12:52,901 -- 01:12:55,199

Poplar Grove, it's called. Yeah.

1372

01:
12:56,504 -- 01:12:58,995

Oh, sure, Joe,

there's a midnight bus. I can grab that.

1373

01:
12:59,074 -- 01:13:00,541

Midnight bus, what are you talking about?

1374

01:
13:00,608 -- 01:13:03,736

I'll have Asthma and Pastrami

pick you up in about 40 minutes.

1375

01:
13:03,812 -- 01:13:04,904

Sure tonight.

1376

01:
13:04,979 -- 01:13:07,140

I've got a justice of the peace on call.

1377

01:
13:07,215 -- 01:13:08,978

There'll be a justice

of the peace tomorrow.

1378

01:
13:09,050 -- 01:13:10,984

Now, why not do this thing right?

1379

01:
13:11,052 -- 01:13:15,284

I want to wait until the old boys go to bed.

I can't walk out on them cold.

1380

01:
13:15,356 -- 01:13:16,448

Maybe you'd like to sit down

1381

01:
13:16,524 -- 01:13:18,856

and knit them eight little sweaters

to remember you by.

1382

01:
13:18,927 -- 01:13:22,158

I've told you how it's going to be,

now stop barking orders.

1383

01:
13:22,230 -- 01:13:23,458

So long.

1384

01:
13:27,168 -- 01:13:28,863

Get the car ready.

1385

01:
13:30,472 -- 01:13:33,066

GURKAKOFF:
I could prove to you

by the laws of relativity

1386

01:
13:33,141 -- 01:13:36,372

that it was not I who ran into the signpost,

1387

01:
13:36,444 -- 01:13:38,639

but that it was the signpost which ran...

1388

01:
13:38,713 -- 01:13:41,113

That's all right, go ahead, sit down.

1389

01:
13:42,050 -- 01:13:45,144

But that it was the signpost

which ran into me.

1390

01:
13:46,554 -- 01:13:47,680

Let me explain.

1391

01:
13:47,755 -- 01:13:51,816

If you do, by that same law,

your head will run into this bottle.

1392

01:
13:52,660 -- 01:13:56,357

- Before you do that, I'd like a drink, please.

- By all means, excuse me.

1393

01:
13:56,431 -- 01:13:58,194

No, I think I'll hit the hay, get some sleep.

1394

01:
13:58,266 -- 01:14:00,097

- Why?

- The evening's young yet.

1395

01:
14:00,168 -- 01:14:02,568

Oh, no, I don't belong here.

This is a bachelor dinner.

1396

01:
14:02,637 -- 01:14:04,969

- But this one is different.

- No, that's the law.

1397

01:
14:05,039 -- 01:14:07,473

We've heard from the garage.

The car will be ready in the morning.

1398

01:
14:07,542 -- 01:14:09,476

Perhaps it will hold together

until Rancocas.

1399

01:
14:09,544 -- 01:14:10,602

Then we'll be leaving early.

1400

01:
14:10,678 -- 01:14:15,342

Yeah, after issuing an urgent appeal

to all signposts not to charge at us.

1401

01:
14:15,550 -- 01:14:16,574

That's right.

1402

01:
14:16,651 -- 01:14:17,777

What...

1403

01:
14:17,852 -- 01:14:20,116

What time shall we waken you,

about 7:
30?

1404

01:
14:20,188 -- 01:14:22,213

I'll be awake all right.

1405

01:
14:23,158 -- 01:14:26,093

Well, kids, here's to you.

1406

01:
14:26,161 -- 01:14:28,857

- Here's to you.

- Here's to all of us.

1407

01:
14:28,930 -- 01:14:30,056

Yes, to all of us.

1408

01:
14:35,069 -- 01:14:36,502

Pottsy, I...

1409

01:
14:38,706 -- 01:14:41,174

You know,

you boys still have time to warn him.

1410

01:
14:41,242 -- 01:14:44,370

- A man is a goof to marry any woman.

- Just let them try to warn me.

1411

01:
14:44,445 -- 01:14:48,074

He'll have to console us that

there aren't seven more just like you.

1412

01:
14:48,149 -- 01:14:51,846

- Yeah, one for each of us.

- Of assorted ages, of course.

1413

01:
14:51,920 -- 01:14:53,251

Naturally.

1414

01:
14:53,821 -- 01:14:54,810

I...

1415

01:
14:55,857 -- 01:14:56,846

Well, I...

1416

01:
14:57,425 -- 01:15:00,360

I'd like to keep you all in a locket, always.

1417

01:
15:00,962 -- 01:15:04,125

Eight squirrelly cherubs

right out of this world.

1418

01:
15:05,934 -- 01:15:08,630

- Bye, kids.

- Good night.

1419

01:
15:08,970 -- 01:15:10,096

Goodnight.

1420

01:
15:10,171 -- 01:15:12,731

Did you hear, Potts?

I'm a squirrelly cherub.

1421

01:
15:33,361 -- 01:15:36,592

No, no, no.

No, I insist, the happiest marriages

1422

01:
15:36,664 -- 01:15:38,894

are those which produce three children

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