Bandits Page #2

I don't feel good about

driving up Main Street...

...wearing clothes that say "inmate".

Do you know what I mean?

And why are we stopping here?

This is where they keep the cash.

The cash!?

Hey! Stupid!

What cash?

Didn't you say something

about needing money?

Oh, yeah.

But I mean not right now.

Look, Joe.

Let's just discuss this for a minute.

I mean, I know that money's

on the list...

...but it's not at the top of the list.

- Bingo.

- Bingo, what?

What do you mean, "Bingo"?

Are you gonna knock-over a bank

with a "magic marker"?

I mean, what are you gonna do?

Write on them?

We don't even have a plan.

You have to have

some kind of plan to rob a bank.

We're wearing matching damn

uniforms that say "inmate" on them.

Unless these people are blind,

I don't think this is gonna work.

Do you understand?

Don't move.

Take out your gun,

thumb an middle finger on the butt...

...hand it to me slowly.

Here we go.

Here we go. Here we go.

Ladies and gentlemen, we'll be out

of your lane in just a second.

No phone calls, no alarms, please!

Cash doors, open!

Take a bag, fill it with cash!

Cash, please!

Ma'am, is there any other cash

in the back?

No.

Don't touch that phone, sir!

Are you sure?

Don't touch that!

- Are you telling me the truth?

- I'm telling you the truth.

You look very honest.

Quickly, please!

Thank you! Thank you!

He made,

he made no plan whatsoever for this.

Here we go!

Put that right in there.

I'll take it.

Thank you! Thank you!

I'll take that! Here we go!

OK. Thank you very much.

There's just never enough time

when you're working.

Thank you for your cooperation!

No phone calls! No alarms!

Here we go! Come on!

Take this.

Sir! In case

you need to highlight anything!

Here we go! Let's go!

Hey! Hey!

Stop! Stop!

- Hey! Ho! Ho, ho! Ho!

- What?

Sir?

I need to borrow your car.

Take the bus, a**hole.

Hey! Come on!

This car!

Let's go! No, no!

This car! This!

Have the gun?

No.

Goddamn it!

Hold it!

Come on. Stop it. Act regular.

Chest pain, left arm a little numb...

...accelerated heart beats, spots.

I'm actually seeing spots.

Hang on. Hang on. Hang on!

Out! Out! Out! Out! Out!

Hey Terry, come here.

It's all right.

May I, please, go back to prison?

Not yet.

Oh, sh*t!

What's your name?

Cheri.

Zip up your pants, Cheri.

You too.

I'm Phil.

So, where's your mom, Cheri?

My mom doesn't live here anymore.

And your dad?

Oh, he's fishing for the weekend.

So your dad left you here all alone.

Oh, no, he thinks

I'm at a friend's house.

And how about you, scooter?

I told my folks I had a soccer trip.

Lie to your parents?

You're kidding, right?

No, I'm not kidding.

I'm sorry...

...who are you, guys?

Hey, you're inmates.

What'd you say your name was?

Phil!?

Do you think there's something

funny about being an inmate, Phil?

We're bank robbers, OK?

So, what's on our mind?

Paraiso del Mar.

Paraiso?

Paradise.

My uncle owns this little hotel, on the

water, about 100 miles south of Acapulco.

That's Mexico.

Right. That's where

they keep Acapulco, Terry.

But I have sanitation issues, Joe.

We'll buy the hotel, turn in into a

night-club and resort...

...I could wear a tuxedo,

sell margaritas to the tourists...

We could have some fun.

You'd do that!?

I mean, you and me.

Yeah.

Partners?

Partners.

Tuxedos and margaritas?

Good, right?

Yeah.

I could run the kitchen, you could

work the room...

It's a high-risk business, but,

considering the alternatives...

I think that sounds really good.

Just have one question.

How do we pay for it?

Well...

...we are bank robbers.

So, where is it?

Below my belt and above my knees.

No. You know what I mean.

You're gonna get us killed.

Maybe I'll save the day.

We'll both be rich and famous

and on TV.

I think there's a way to do it right.

I'm sure of it.

So, where is it?

In daddy's closet,

behind the golf clubs.

All right, I'm going.

What's the biggest problem,

every time you rob a bank?

Getting caught?

Exactly.

There's guards to shoot at you...

...there's tellers to hit alarms...

...there's customers

to get in the way, right?

You're right.

You need to control the environment.

No guards, no tellers, no customers.

Yeah, but if you work at night...

...you still gotta deal with the alarms.

But we don't work at night.

When you do it?

Holidays?

No.

We do it with the bank manager...

in the morning, with the bank manager's

keys and the bank manager's vault codes.

Because we kidnap him

the night before.

I mean, think about it.

We pick a town, we pick a bank...

...we find out who's in charge...

...we pay him a little visit...

...we spend the night with him,

like we are here...

...the next morning

we all go to work together...

...before anybody else gets there...

...we take the money and run.

Tuxedos and margaritas, Joe,

just like you said.

Life will be like one big sunset.

Wanna se something neat?

Aim the shotgun at me.

What?

Aim it at me.

Freeze!?

Pretty good.

But first you gotta pump a shell

into the chamber.

Like this.

Neat.

Conversation is over, all right?

Well, I feel good in this color...

...I've always liked this kind of color.

But you boned me on the pants, Joe.

It's really not fair.

It's a low blow.

I picked those pants out for me,

I laid them out.

I specifically chose those.

Well, well!

Look at you, gentlemen!

Are the clothes all right?

Are we looking spiffy in plaid!

He likes plaid.

Oh!

Two sugars, right?

Thank you very much.

Cheri, we're gonna have

to borrow Phil's car.

Oh! That's OK.

He doesn't mind.

The hell I don't.

It's a new transmission.

So, where are we headed?

Rufus.

Where's Rufus?

It's up the road a little ways.

What's at Rufus?

Pollard...

Harvey Pollard.

What?

Oh, you feel the need to shoot?

Well, go ahead, and shoot then.

Oh, you feel the need to shoot?

Well, go ahead, and shoot then.

What the hell?

Feel the need...

Hey!

Ho, dog!

Joe!?

Joe!

What's up?

I thought you were still in...

No, no. No.

Got out early.

Got out early.

Terry...

...say hello to my cousin,

Harvey Pollard.

Glad to know you.

Any friend of Joe's, man...

Was that, Harry?

Terry...

Well, those are wicked pants!

So, what are you doing?

Working?

Special effects.

Well, stunt work primarily.

Well, mostly training right now.

Damn squibs don't fire.

We're looking for somebody

that can handle a car.

Well, I can do that!

Why?

Banks.

You're fooling me.

Well, hell, Joe, I'm just the

man you're looking for.

You want a beer?

- Yeah, I'll take a beer.

- OK.

Timer malfunction.

Drop!

I'm gonna get a beer.

He's honest, and he falls real good.

Me, I wanna make a name

for myself with fire.

I've been practicing with gels, you

know, mostly on my hands...

...but I need a suit.

Harvey, speaking of the job...

Never wondered why a man

sets himself on fire...

...and jumps off the top

of a 12 story building?

Gosh, no, I didn't, Harv!

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