Barbary Coast Page #6

Don't get excited, stranger.

Go on, take him out.

Make your plays, gentlemen.

Hey, Swan, open the door.

Please, go away, Louis.

Come on, open the door.

I've got something for you.

Part of the money you won tonight.

I don't want it. Keep it.

What you acting so hot for?

I don't know.

Just go away and leave me alone.

Women are like frogs. You can never tell

which way they're gonna jump.

The old man of the sea.

How are you?

Son, still feel a little depressed

over your bad luck last night.

- Yes, I remember.

- I never seen the like before.

Don't let it dampen

that fine western spirit of yours.

I still have two burros left.

That's right, ya did.

But you ain't got 'em now.

They run away.

A very interesting city.

Surprised I have my boots.

- Any complaints?

- No.

No complaints.

Wisdom was never bought at so cheap a price.

You still feel pretty bad, son?

Maybe it's somethin' you ate.

Gall and wormwood sit hard

on the delicate stomach.

Gentlemen, I don't want to depress you

with my problems...

...but is there a way for the shorn lamb to

earn enough money for his passage home?

A shorn lamb

of infinite accomplishments and...

...a great mass of personal charm.

I like the way he talks.

I don't.

Nobody's askin' you.

I like a windbag like that around.

- Go on, get him something to do.

- If you say so.

Get busy on those.

You mean these interesting vessels?

We call 'em spittoons and we like 'em shiny.

With all deference to my benefactor,

I think I'll call them cuspidors.

- How do you feel, son?

- Like a useful member of society at last.

That's fine.

- You ever wait on table?

- No. I'm sure I have a talent for it.

You can begin now.

It ain't hard to be a garsin.

Just stick up for your rights

when they get fresh with you.

And always take a bottle in your right hand

and when they're comin' to...

I may spoil her appetite.

Good morning.

Would you like to see the menu, ma'am?

- What are you doing here?

- I'm waiting for your order.

I don't want you around here.

I don't blame you after last night.

I'm very glad of this chance to apologize.

I don't like sarcasm

so early in the day from waiters.

There's no sarcasm intended, ma'am.

You hate me, why hide it behind silly words?

That's not an accurate account of my feelings.

The worst I feel is kind of philosophical.

What are you standing there for?

I told you I don't want you around here.

If you don't mind, I'd like to work here until

I get money to go back to New York.

You could steer clear

of the harpies next time.

What would you have for breakfast?

Would you like to see the menu?

I'll give you your fare back

to Gramercy Park, Mr. Carmichael.

I'm sorry, but I have some notion

on the subject of handouts.

- I'm not good enough to give you money.

- I'm not bad enough to take it, ma'am.

If you don't hate me, I hate you.

With all of your talk about being a poet...

...you're small, mean, righteous,

and no different from the rest.

- Would you like to see the menu, ma'am?

- Bring me some toast, coffee and jam.

And yes...

...some lamb kidneys in wine sauce.

Yes, ma'am.

I just met a fellow

who told me something very interesting.

I told you what was going to happen to

you if I ever caught you lyin'!

I caught you.

What a pleasant way to begin

a conversation, Louis.

And before breakfast, too.

- You wasn't alone in the rain.

- You mean yesterday.

You know what I mean. Yeah, yesterday.

You was seen.

Come out with it. Don't sit there

like a dog barking at a cat in a tree.

I was seen doing what?

- Who was he?

- Who was who?

Who was the man you were with yesterday?

You're hurting my arm.

I'll hurt worse than that

if you don't tell me.

You were seen with him by the water,

talking to him.

- Who was he?

- I told you...

I beg your pardon, ma'am.

There are no lamb kidneys.

Would you like the wine sauce by itself?

We're talkin', can't you see?

Go on, get out of here.

Sure.

Who was he?

Louis, I told you I got lost

in the fog and I...

I stopped somebody to ask the way

and he told me.

- That isn't a hanging offense, is it?

- I'll find out if you're lying.

Waiter.

Bring me a steak and a piece of pie.

Did you hear about

the Chinaman being killed last night?

Yes.

I was wondering, Colonel, if I couldn't...

...weave it into this piece

about the climate.

Sayin' how sorry we was that the Chinaman...

...was goin' to miss the salubrious spell of

weather we're expectin' next week.

All topics sound hollow

and commonplace compared to...

...the glorious climate of California,

Mr. Wigham.

Mr. McTavish was in again.

What did he want?

He had an item about the

roulette wheel at the Bella Donna.

He says it's crooked,

that they stole a small fortune...

...from a young fellow

playing there last night.

It's quite an interesting item, Colonel.

Avoid all mundane matters,

and we shall flourish like a green bay tree.

The beacon of the press.

In the hell to which all journalists must

descend when they die...

...we shall sit at red-hot desks

with quills of fire in our hand...

...and spend eternity writing about

the salubrious weather of that region.

Let us serve our apprenticeship here

thoroughly and intelligently.

How do you spell "aurora borealis?"

Call it Mr. Chamalis' rosy-fingered dawn.

What's that?

You've got eyes, go on and read it.

It's news, that's what it is.

News you wouldn't print

in that yellow-dog paper of yours.

You'd better not put that up.

There'll be trouble.

There will that...

I strongly advise against it, sir.

Mr. McTavish, take that down.

You had...

I warned you.

Go on back inside

and write a story about the climate.

Stop where you are, sir!

This is the first honest news the Clarion

ever had and it's going to stay there!

Stop or I'll shoot!

Mr. Wigham.

Colonel, are you hurt bad?

Get a doctor quick.

Land a hand here, someone.

- Mr. Wigham.

- Yes?

I want you to change

the policy of the Clarion.

I want you to write a story...

...I should have written myself long ago.

I want you to tell

the people of San Francisco...

...that no city can exist

without law and order.

Don't try to talk, Colonel.

Write a story about that flag.

Write that wherever it flies...

...it brings a promise of life...

...liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

There are some people in this town

who don't seem to know that.

Let the Clarion tell them.

- Print the news.

- I will, Colonel.

We'll carry on.

Law and order.

Print it.

You've got a job. We're here to help you.

Two of you, come with me.

I don't need anybody to go with me.

Here you are, gents.

At last we've got a paper in this town.

All about law and order.

Here you are. The Clarion.

Take one.

The voice of San Francisco.

No charge, brother.

- All about law and order.

- What you think! Law and order.

She's come to San Francisco.

Buy the paper, she's free.

Law and order in San Francisco.

That's a new one on you, brother.

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