Batman: Under the Red Hood Page #4

Mine was more flashy maitre d'

than motorcycle fetish.

You kids today.

I'm sorry, could you hoid on?

i was just in the middle of setting fire

to your gang.

RED HOOD:
Go ahead.

You think i care if that scum dies?

Don't know. i just wanted your attention.

RED HOOD:

You've always had my attention.

But what i really wanted

was an audience with you.

I'm sorry, that seems to imply

that you organized this little clambake.

RED HOOD:

i did. Sure, i had lots of plans...

...but the endgame was getting Black Mask

so desperate that he'd cut a deal.

He was the only one with the connections

to get into Arkham...

...and get you out.

You can't trust anybody.

So i've been bamboozled.

oh, my.

RED HOOD:

i wouldn't undersell it.

it took a lot of work

to bring about our reunion.

Reunion? Have we met before?

RED HOOD:

Yes, we have.

well, here's to warm memories.

[MUFFLED SCREAMING]

[YELLS]

[SCREAMING]

RED HooD [oVER RADio]:

i've got him.

You want him? Meet me at crime alley.

[CoUGHING]

[LAUGHING]

okay.

So, what's the plan?

Slumber party? Charades?

A little Truth or Dare?

Yes:
i'll start with "dare."

well, maybe i'll just go with "truth."

[JoKER GRUNTING]

RED HOOD:

Tell me, how does that feel?

You know, it only hurts when i laugh.

But, hey, i gotta know.

who are you?

You said we knew one another,

and you do seem really familiar.

we double at the prom?

or maybe blow up a school bus together?

RED HOOD:

No:
I'm just something you helped make.

That's pretty cryptic...

...but interesting.

Tell me more.

RED HOOD:

Sure. Listen up.

[JoKER GRUNTING]

BATMAN:

Unreal.

RED HOOD:

Hello.

So glad you could make it.

This ends tonight. All of it.

RED HOOD:

Nobody knows that better than me.

RED HOOD:

Ha. oh, you and your gadgets.

You're not the oniy one with toys.

[BEEPING]

Crap.

[GRUNTING]

[RED HooD LAUGHING]

Look at you.

i guess we should keep it even.

Jason.

Yes.

BATMAN:

i don't wanna fight you.

RED HOOD:

All evidence to the contrary.

Please, i can help you.

i know what happened.

oh, you got to talking with Ra's, huh?

Does it make it easier for you to think

that my dip in his fountain of youth...

...turned me rabid?

or is this just the real me?

Tell me...

...what bothers you more, that your greatest

failure has returned from the grave?

or that i've become a better Batman

than you?

You're ruling through intimidation

and murder. Just another criminal.

I'm what this city needs.

Hidden goodies all over, huh? we're both

just a couple of walking armories.

Maybe so,

but let's see how you do without your toys.

Enough. it's over.

You say you wanna be better than me.

But it won't happen.

Not like this.

i know i failed you...

...but i tried to save you, Jason.

I'm trying to save you now.

is that what you think this is about?

That you let me die? i don't know

what clouds your judgment worse.

Your guilt

or your antiquated sense of morality.

Bruce, i forgive you for not saving me.

But why? why on God's earth...

...is he sti;; alive?

[CACKLING]

Gotta give the boy points.

He came all the way back from the dead

to make this shindig happen.

So who's got a camera?

ooh! ooh!

Get one of me and the kid first.

Then you and me, then the three of us.

And then one with the crowbar. Then--

[YELLS]

You'll be as quiet as possib;e

or i'll put one in your ;ap first.

Party pooper. No cake for you.

ignoring what he's done in the past.

Blind;y, stupid;y, disregarding

the entire graveyards he's filled...

...the thousands who have suffered,

the friends he's crippled.

You know, i thought--

i thought i'd be the last person

you'd ever let him hurt.

if it had been you

that he beat to a bloody pulp...

...if he had taken you from this worid,

i would've done nothing...

...but search the planet for this pathetic pile

of evil death-worshipping garbage...

...and sent him off to hell.

You don't understand.

i don't think you've ever understood.

what?

what, your moral code

just won't allow for that?

it's too hard to cross that line?

No. God Aimighty, no.

it'd be too damned easy.

All i've ever wanted to do is kill him.

A day doesn't go by

i don't think about subjecting him...

...to every horrendous torture

he's dealt out to others and then end him.

Aw. So you do think about me.

But if i do that...

...if i allow myself to go down

into that piace...

...i'll never come back.

why? I'm not talking about killing Penguin

or Scarecrow or Dent.

I'm talking about him. Just him.

And doing it because....

Because he took me away from you.

i can't. I'm sorry.

That is so sweet.

well, you won't have a choice.

-i won't--

-This is what it's all been about.

This.

You, and me and him.

Now is the time you decide.

if you won't kill

this psychotic piece of filth, i will.

if you wanna stop me,

you're gonna have to kill me.

-You know i won't--

-I'm gonna biow his deranged brains out.

And if you wanna stop it,

you are gonna have to shoot me.

Right in my face.

This is turning out even better

than i'd hoped.

it's him or me, you have to decide.

Decide now. Do it.

Him or me? Decide.

[JoKER CACKLING]

i can't believe you got him.

You expert, rooting-tooting, eagle-eyed,

goth-loving marksman.

i iove it.

You managed to find a way to win.

And everybody still loses.

No, don't spoil it. This is better.

I'm the only one who's gonna get

what he wants tonight.

Yes, bing, bang, boom.

we all go out together.

Don't you just love a happy ending?

[CACKLING]

woMAN oN TV:
Sources close to the

district attorney's office have intimated...

...the case will likely be dropped

due to lack of evidence.

But the Black Mask is still under

investigation for his alleged complicity...

...in Joker's escape from Arkham.

The guards charged with aiding and abetting

the escape...

...were found murdered

in the Gotham courthouse jail...

...while the alleged crime lord, Black Mask,

was released...

...on $1 million bail

for his suspected involvement...

...and is currently awaiting a hearing.

Meanwhile, the Joker has been returned

to Arkham Asylum.

Officials claim extra measures

have been taken...

...to ensure another escape

would be impossible.

MAN:
Prior to his arrest,

Black Mask was being strong-armed...

...by the mysterious Red Hood.

ALFRED:

Sir:

in light of all the recent events,

would you like me to remove that?

No.

This doesn't change anything.

it doesn't change anything at all.

BATMAN:

okay, let's go.

if you can't suit up quickly

at home base...

...I'm concerned how you would handle it

in the field.

ALFRED:

Perhaps he's primping.

As i recall, Master Richard spent nearly

half an hour admiring his reflection...

...the first time he donned his cape.

Jason, get on out here

or I'm going on patrol without you.

-Ha!

-My word.

-Gotcha.

-would have...

...if i hadn't seen you slip behind

the computer banks three minutes ago.

-No, i got you.

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